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Baby Daddy

Hug It Out! Suck It Up!

 Josie turns 1.5 years on Tuesday. No fooling. The big innovation this week: hugs. She’s in a phase. How wonderful is this? It’s wonderful beyond description. It's like what I dreamed it would be having a daughter: super affection, minus the exhaustion. We've also begun a ritual of walking around the block, our daily constitutional. This allows us to go see the birds and to visit our neighbors Bridget and Jim (Bridget gave Josie a bunny slightly larger than her, which she hugs with great ardor) and to visit any stray dogs that might be around, none of which frigthen Josie, unless they bark right in her face. She doesn't scare easy.

    At the same time, Josie is taking a serious interest in the basic girl stuff. She's super into dressing her dolls and giving her dolls bottles, the basic modeling behaviors. She also loves to go run and get the dish rag and wipe up random patches of the floor, which she considers cleaning. And she's got a vacuum fetish that is unrivaled. When Babymamma gets out the vacuum, she goes into a frenzy. And she'll yell out "vacuuuu!" several times a day, no matter where she is. We don't know what to make of this, frankly.

   With boys, it seems more obvious to me, from an evolutionary standpoint. For hundreds of thousands of years -- before the sliver of history that modern man represents -- boys who focused on large, fast-moving objects (i.e. animals) and who engaged in physical combat behaviors generally did better, survived, and passed down their genes. That's why lots of the boys we know are obsessed with cars/trucks/buses/planes/whatevers, and why they tend to get into imaginative play that involves disembowling. I can't quite figure out what evolutionary trait would select for vacuum fetishism. Yes, I know, she's just copying Babymamma. But it's like like Babymamma LOVES vacuuming. It's not like she exudes the attitude: Hey, I was BORN to vacuum. And maybe she vacuums a bit more than other folks, because of cat hair, but we do have wood floors.

    Regardless, we're both delighted with her early interest in domestic stuff, and babies in particular. We're hoping when the time comes for her to have a little brother or sister, that this will bode well. Can anybody out there give us some reassurance on this point? Or will she love the idea of a baby sibling, but hate the actual reality?

  
 

 




Comments

 

Tracey said:

I love the hugs! I was drawing Cade's bath one night and he was standing beside me and he squealed "Mamaaa" and I felt his little arm around me and then he patted me on the back. It was too freakin' adorable.

It's hard to believe that was only a month and a half ago. Now at 21 months we're catching hugs on the run. His interest in domestic life is usually asking me to pick him up while I'm cooking to see what I'm doing. (and of course, immediately asking to be put back down, wash, rinse, repeat)

He does wipe up things, and try to sweep (we have mostly wood floors and rugs), and if a cheerio falls out of his bowl it's "Uh oh" and he puts it back in.

Then he throws toys around without rhyme or reason and likes to turn his cup upside down and empty it's contents everywhere.

Ahem.

March 29, 2008 10:24 PM
 

John said:

Kinda the same boat, but a little farther along. Have daughter Abby who's six and son Jack who is 2 and a half. The thing when Jack was born was Abby's dissapointment of Jacks inability (as a new born) to engage in any sort of "impromptu broadway musical numbers" that are sung by saying the same word over and over, or shag balls. We probably could have managed that better.

Now the caveat, your a little older, having this baby means a lot more than it would if you where 23, myself included. When Jack came, I took me a while to warm up to him ( I would still throw myself on grenade for him) I felt conflicted about who should I take care of, listen to, etc. It's taken me a while to sort it out. The boy is the complete opposite of Abby...he's grumpy, deliberate, demanding and thinks that things on a shelf are his own shooting gallery to throw things and knock off.

It's taken me around three years but now I kinda like him. The father/daughter thing is real for me. Abby and I will always have this mutual admiration thing going (aside from when she is 16, smoking, two deep into Malt liquor and saying to her friends "my Dad is such a prick".

I guess my point is that your capacity for love is there, just don't expect it to be the same as your love for Josie, It will be good, just different.

John in Cincinnati  

March 30, 2008 12:32 PM

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About the Blogger

Steve Almond

Steve Almond in Boston

The author of My Life in Heavy Metal and Candyfreak found out his fiancée was pregnant five days after they got engaged. He tells you what it's like to be a brand-new Baby Daddy. Visit his website here.

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