The actual anniversary slipped by me, but last week and change marked my three-year anniversary of blogging here at Babble. Wowza! How the time doth fly. Hard to believe that when I first started writing here, it was about breastfeeding and sleep schedules and watching the girls’ unique personalities devlop. And now, three years later, I’m writing about….well….dinnertime and bedtime routines and how interesting it is to watch the girls’ unique personalities develop. Plus ca change….
I’ve actually been digging back into old posts a lot these days as I work on my book — “researching” my own life, as it were. Life moves so quickly and babies grow into children so fast; I don’t think I’d be able to remember half as much as I’m remembering if I didn’t have my own blog posts to jog my memory.
It’s fun (and a little bit sad) to trip down memory lane, looking at pictures of the girls when they were just chubby little babies, and reading about their first big milestones. It’s also fun to relive particularly memorable moments of blogging here, like my psuedo blog war with my friend Steve Almond (which a lot of people — to my amazement — thought was real), and the first time I wrote openly about my depression.
It’s also got me thinking a lot about the future of this blog — and the possible repercussions of blogging about your kids in general. When I started blogging here, I didn’t really have a sense of how long I would want to do it. “Baby” Squared suggests a certain shelf life. And frankly, I thought I might get tired of blogging after a year or two. But I didn’t. And at this point, it’s hard to imagine not writing here. Where would I get all my parenting advice — not to mention reassurance that I’m not / my kids aren’t, in fact, crazy?
And now, if don’t blog at least until my book comes out — which will most likely be May, 2012 — my publishers would probably kill me. The girls will be five then. Five!!
Beyond that, I guess, it’s up to me. To blog or not to blog?
Certainly, there may come a time when I just don’t feel inspired to write on a regular basis about my kids / being a parent anymore and want to spend the time on other projects instead. The more complicated issue for me is how the girls would feel about my blogging once they’re old enough to really understand what it is, and what I’m doing. And regardless of how much longer I keep at it, how will they feel when they’re able to go back and read what I wrote?
Will they feel exploited? Embarrassed? Will they be hurt or confused by anything I’ve written here? Will they feel like I’ve used them for my own gain somehow? (Not like I’m getting rich off blogging here by any stretch of the imagination, but it has helped my writing career in various ways.)
There is plenty about my children and my experiences as a parent that I don’t share here. I try very hard not to write anything that I can imagine the girls being upset about five or ten or thirty years from now. (If by then robots haven’t taken over the planet and replaced the Internet with a series of tubes.) And I try to respect their privacy. (Yes, I have written an awful lot about their poop. But believe me, I could go into much more detail.) But I do share a lot.
Sometimes I think maybe I should have given the girls aliases back when I started blogging. Or just stuck to “E” and “C.” But I felt like doing that would make it harder for me to write honestly and from the heart; like it would put up a barrier between me and readers. But maybe I’m just rationalizing my exhibitionist tendencies. Ha!
Anyway, it’s going to be interesting to see what happens when the generation of
blogged-about children comes of age. I can just see it now: support
groups, lawsuits, tell-all memoirs, blogs about being blogged about….
My hope is that my girls will see this blog as evidence of my engagement in their lives — my desire to document and reflect on my experiences as a mother and also celebrate (albeit in a very public way) my love for them. This would be a very mature and measured reaction, however. Before they get there, I may be looking at a couple of very pissed off teenagers.
The girls at approx five months — can you tell who’s who?
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fan of Baby Squared on Facebook for updates when new posts are
bonus material and that whole virtual sense of community thing.
news about my writing elsewhere — including my novel, EDEN LAKE, to be
published in 2011 by Last Light Studio, and my memoir, BABY SQUARED,
first three years of parenting twins, to be published in 2012 by St.