Baby Squared

Browse by Tags

(RSS)
  • Mommy's turn to cry

    Remember how I said I wasn't going to write about bodily functions anymore?  I lied. Well, sort of. This isn't about Elsa and Clio's bodily functions, but my own. Puking, specifically. I spent several hours last night engaged in this delightful activity, my stomach repeatedly, violently insisting on purging itself of its contents long after there was nothing left to purge. It was wretched. On the bright side: at least there was women's gymnastics to watch in between pukes. And the US kicked ass!

     

    After the medal ceremony and some final, valedictory heaves, I basically lay in bed moaning for awhile, because I felt so completely awful -- aching, shaky, spent. Eventually I fell asleep. Today, fortunately, there's been no more puking. But lots of aching and nausea and feeling exhausted. As I write this, I am snacking on my children's Goldfish crackers, bringing my total caloric intake for the day up into the triple digits, I hope. (Another bright side: easy 2 pound crash diet!)

     

    Seriously, though, what is the deal with parenting and getting sick?

     

     

    Read More...


  • Please, let it be food poisoning.

    Has anyone ever wished for food poisoning before? (For themselves, I mean.) Of course, I'd rather not feel sick at all. But I'm really hoping the reason I threw up last night and felt nauseated and weak all day today was that I ate something a bit "off" yesterday. Perhaps the leftover chicken I had for dinner. Because if it's a virus, that means chances are Elsa and Clio are going to get it, too, and I can't deal with any more sick babies. They just got over colds. Then before that it was a stomach virus. Colds before that. And more colds. They don't even go to daycare, for God's sake!

     

    As for me, I have been sick more times in the past six months of my life than I think I've been in the previous six years. Several colds, a stomach virus and a case of (I hope!) food poisoning. Oh yeah, and a month-long bout of clinical depression which still hasn't entirely cleared up. Grrr. What gives? I've heard a lot of people comment that this has been a particularly bad year for illnesses, but I feel like people say that every year. Does having children weaken your immune system? It's not like I'm sleep deprived. I eat well, I drink a lot of water, I wash my hands. Don't these viruses realize I'm trying take care of two toddlers, hold down a job, and write the great American novel, among other things? Could they show just a teensy little bit of mercy?

     

    In other, healthier news, on Saturday, at the invitation of BabyMama (wife of Babby Daddy), we joined her and Josie and apparently every child under seven in the city of Arlington, Massachusetts plus their parents at an Indoor Beach Party for little ones in a school gym. And let me tell you, that Josie sure is a bitch. (JUST KIDDING!!!) 

     

    Seriously, we had a great time. There were beach balls and inner tubes for kids to play with, cardboard boxes and containers for them to make "Recycled castles" with, wading pools full of toys and a couple of "sandboxes" with rice for sand. There was pizza and ice cream and donut holes (three of the four junk food groups), Beach Boy tunes, and general chaos. Outside it poured rain, but inside it was surf city, man.

     

     

     

    This season it's all about the lei-as-choker

     

    Adding to that genuine "real beach" feel, was the fact that a couple of times I no idea where one or both of my children were. Keeping tabs on both of them at once wasn't easy, especially when Alastair ducked out for a few minutes to run an errand. But it was a pretty friendly crowd. And, unlike at the real beach, there was no ocean for the girls to wander haplessly into. Mostly they just went toddling up to various groups of parents and kids and stared longingly at their food. Here's Elsa in action:

     

     

    I was amazed, actually, at how independent and adventurous all three girls were -- Josie, Elsa, and Clio. They were happy to walk around and explore, braving belligerent three year-olds, barrelling six-year-olds and lots of distracted adults. Clio stuck a little closer to us, but struck out on her own a few times. She also had some inner tube adventures:

     

     

    As did Elsa...here seen making her new "uh oh" face. And hanging on to a souvenir from the Recyled Castle-making area. (You venture out in the driving rain to the next town over for something fun and different, and what do they do? They play with tupperware. Just like at home.)

     

     

    So, that was our day at the beach. I guess with so many people crammed into one space, tossing around baby-slobber-infested beach balls and things, it's not terribly unlikely that I could have picked up some kind of virus. But until somebody small starts puking, I'm going to hold onto hope that it was salmonella, e.coli, anything -- just not another something we can all catch!

     


  • McMurphy's Law

    I added the "Mc" in honor of the fact that Alastair is currently in Scotland (which is a key element of this story). McMurphy's law, in our case, goes a little something like this:

     

    If your husband leaves for the UK for a week on Monday night, leaving you alone with your twin one-year-old daughters, then on Tuesday morning, you will wake up feeling nauseated and shaky. While changing the diaper of one of your daughters, you will have to stop mid-change, leaving onesie and PJs unfastened, plop daughter onto the floor and run into the bathroom to puke.

     

    You will then fumble your way through dressing your babies and yourself and proceed to go to work even though you feel like absolute shite, because, seeing as McMurphy's law is in effect, you will also be in the midst of the PROJECT FROM HELL, on a tight deadline, and it's not the kind of thing you can easily pass off to someone else.

     

    You'll soldier through a few hours of work, until people start giving you funny/scared looks as you shuffle greenly through the corridors with a shawl wrapped around you, and you realize you really need to go home and get in bed. (But you also will bring your work home with you, because you've still got to get in a few more hours.) When you wake up from your nap, it will be to the sound of one of your daughters (McClio), downstairs with Jean, crying inconsolably. When you go downstairs and pick her up, she will promptly puke all over you. And continue to puke approximately every half hour for the next three hours. (In between puking and cleaning up after it, you will be trying to get work done, of course.)

     

    You get the gist of it. Yes, yesterday things were looking grim in the Baby Squared household. I was bracing myself for a terrrible night -- I thought Clio would continue throwing up, and that it was only a matter of time before Elsa joined in. And, of course, I still felt like crap, and had a raging headache owing to the fact that I'd barely eaten or drunk anything all day.  I made a panicked, tearful call to mom and dad (not thinking they could actually do anything, just looking for parental love) and called on a friend, who delivered Pedialyte and a much-needed hug.

     

    Then McMurphy showed me a little mercy. Clio slept soundly through the night, and today she was feeling much better -- almost her normal self. The bug has migrated to her lower GI tract, where it is much less unpleasant for her, apparently. Elsa is, so far, still healthy. (Still waiting for the other McShoe to drop there...) I'm feeling better, AND we brought in a freelancer to help me with the big bad project. So life seems much less overwhelming.

     

    I actually considered blogging last night in the midst of my misery, because I knew you guys would come through with sympathy and cheerleading and your own tales of sick baby woe to make me feel better. Turns out, even just knowing that was a great comfort. So I decided to turn off the computer and get some much-needed rest instead. (McThank you!)

     



in

About the Blogger

Jane Roper

Jane Roper in Boston

One baby? Piece of cake. Try two. This working mother gives you the inside scoop on the ultimate in extreme parenting: twins.

GROUP BLOGS

  • Strollerderby

    The smartest, funniest, most exhaustive parenting blog in the blogosphere.
  • Droolicious

    Modern design for modern parents.
  • FameCrawler

    Your daily baby celebrity fix.
back to blog homepage