Truth is, most men wouldn’t deem material objects as "better than sex". But there may be some exceptions. This Father’s Day, give that Dad in your life something extraordinary, something that really says “you rule”, something that would not only compare to but may outshine the excitement of a roll in the old hay.
First I should probably point out that this is a fantasy list, some are affordable, others are for those lucky lottery winners our there. Yeah, the list is pretty spendy, but you know, for most red blooded men, you’d really have to deliver a lot of bang for the buck for them to think it was better than sex. I’ve tried to include items for all sorts of fathers. I used as my model the typical carnivorous, sports watching, tech toy lovin’ American male. Perhaps your partner would rather receive a signed Susan Faludi book or a delightful Chianti but this list, after consulting with a mix of males, is representative of the lustful items suitable for that standard American Male 2.0.
So without delay, here is my list of Father’s Day Presents That Are Better Than Sex (organized in growing order of seductiveness of course)
10. Home Beer-Tap System
Who doesn’t love a sudsy glass on hoppy goodness? But instead of having your hubby sip from a bottle or can, let him pull his own pint of draft beer with the BeerTender from Heineken and Krups B95 Beer-tap System. Yup, Krups known for their line of coffee makers and grinders has partnered with lager maker Heineken to create a system to deliver their DraughtKeg beer right into your awaiting glass in the comfort of your own home rather than at the local pub. This machine keeps the beer a precise 41 degrees and will keep the beer fresh for a month. (on sale for $249.95 was $400)
9. Kobe Bryant Signed Basketball
What goes best with a nice cold beer? (see above). Why some good old-fashioned sports of course. Game five of the NBA final between the Los Angeles Lakers and the Boston Celtics is on Father’s Day, so a whole lot of dad’s will surely be parked in front of the tube. A perfect prop to go along with the chips, dips, and a freshly poured draft beer is a Kobe Bryant autographed Official NBA Basketball from Steiner Sports. ($799.00 and it comes with a Upper Deck Certificate of Authenticity). Just make sure he follows the house rules of no dribbling in the living room.
8. La-Z-Boy Recliner
My father in-law proudly guards “his chair”. No one dares to sit in it, or even look at for too long. It is so warn and tattered and the seat forms to his behind like a glove. It’s totally one of those “dad” things, his happy place. Get your guy his own cushy seating to claim as his very own. Instead of opting for some fancy designer, I thought I’d go all old school with a genuine La-Z-Boy recliner The Carmen. But this isn’t your dad’s La-Z-Boy. This leather chair has a nice modern sensibility to go along with the wide armed comfort and of couse their famous kick-out leg rest.
7. Aersosmith Guitar Hero Bundle
Yeah, odds are your man is spending his Saturday nights reading Pat the Bunny to sleepy babes rather than rocking out on stage to babes of a totally different ilk. But for those with rock star dreams that never came to fruition, they can always make some music magic with some hot Guitar Hero action. Coming out later this month, the Aerosmith Guitar Hero Bundle will hit the stores and he’ll be able to get in touch with his inner Joe Perry. ($109.99)
6. Sony Ericsson Bluetooth Watch
I love things that do double duty. This secret agent like contraption is perfect for the Bluetooth-obsessed clock watcher. This wrist wear – the Sony Ericsson MBW-150 will show incoming calls on the face of the watch, will vibrate when new calls come in, will let you accept or reject them, will send an alert of incoming SMS messages, can control your phone’s music player, it’s water resistant oh and it tells the time too. (to be used in conjunction with Bluetooth headset) On sale for $289.99 (was $499.99)
5. Vertu Nurburgring Racetrack Phone
Speaking of phones. I’m just picking this one ‘cos although it looks cool it is, well, ridiculously expensive! The Vertu Nurburgring Racetrack Phone is a titanium limited edition cell that commemorates Germany’s legendary racetrack. So if the dad in your life gets off on having the most exclusive, overpriced gadget known to man, well this one is for him. $8000 from Barneys (yeah, eight grand, all those zeros was not a typo)
4. Mulit-Cade Games
In my house, this present would so actually be more for me than my hubby. As soon as I found it I started dropping hints like “you know, what we really need, a Ms. PacMan machine in the house, don ‘t you think?”. So far I’ve just been getting blank stares. But I think his tune would change if he knew that you could get not just one game but up to sixty games on one setup with the Upright Cabinet Multi-Cade Game unit! You can get old school standards like Donkey Kong, Centipede and Frogger. (60 Game Unit - $2999.00)
3. , Bacon of the Month Club
Bacon has been a downfall for countless die-hard vegetarians. The aroma of sizzling slices can be just too seductive for at these non-meat eaters. I’ve been witness to many a vegetarians being felled by the seductive snack. I like to call bacon “the gateway meat”. Once they eat it, it just leads to harder stuff (filet mignons, pork chops, and even the rare case of Foie Gras). For those who do consume carnal culinary delights, the bacon of the month club from The Grateful Palate is a yummy and perfect gift. ($150 for one package shipped each month)
2. Sony Bravia 52" LCD TV
Yeah, it won’t be a fantasy Father’s Day gift list with out some big gigantic flat screen TV. My pick? The Sony Bravia 52” 1080p 120 Hz Flat-Panel LCD. Big, bold and destined to get more play than pretty much any other toy in the house. It’s a TV, not much more to say! ($2699)
(See picture at top of page)
1. 2009 Lamborghini Murcielago Roadster
And here is the most outrageous, expensive and boldest message for that fabulous father in your life. If budget ain’t an issue that is. Nothing says “yeah, you’re a pretty good dad” than a 2009 Lamborghini Murcielago Roadster. It does stuff, it goes fast, and would make a good present for pert near anybody. Sure it costs about the same as a 2 bedroom house at $369,200. But isn’t he worth it?
