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  • Is Jordan Ever Going to Pop That Baby Out?

    that's a big ol' belly

    Someone call SeaWorld, there's an Orca on the loose!  Oh, wait, it's just Jordan, aka, Katie Price.  I didn't recognize her with clothes on.  It's an honest mistake.

    Here is why I love the British.  This is part of the press for this photo as reported by The Sun

    HEAVILY-pregnant JORDAN looks fit to burst as she walks hand-in-hand with hubby PETER ANDRE at Ladies’ Day.

    The glamour model, whose baby is due this week, even had a hospital bag full of pyjamas just in case.

    Jordan, looking elegant in a tight cocktail dress, joked she hoped the thrill of a win would bring on labour — and bookies offered 16-1 she would give birth in the Royal Enclosure.

    Top-hatted Peter, 34, kept a helicopter on stand-by for mother-of-two Jordan, real name Katie Price — but she held out.

    The pop star patted her bump “for luck” before each race.

    ... Some Ascot diehards were not impressed.

    Charles Bovery, 52, raged: “Jordan in the Royal Enclosure, how truly awful. It’s downright tacky.”

    Ha! They called her elegant! Here in the states, we tend to go with things like, "Tramp Knocked-Up... Again, Hangs Out at Tracks."

    I'm not sure which is better. 

     


  • The Fair Jordan and Mirror, Mirror, Off the Wall

    belly babe 

    Katie "Jordan" Price is suing the makers of a mirror that had been installed in her home for four days before falling and injuring her partially blind five-year-old son.  He suffered cuts to the face and a broken nose.

    Said Jordan,  "We are taking legal action against that company.

    "But I just feel sorry for Harvey because he can't see that well and just imagine it falling on him. It's awful."

    I really wanted to poke a little fun here, what with the huge mirror hanging in the home of the vain Jordan, but I can't make light of a kid getting hurt.  Come on, he's nearly blind.  I'm not an animal. 

     


  • These 'Runway Moms' Still Don't Eat Carbs.

    I have to admit I was curious when I heard about a show on The Discovery channel, 'Runway Moms' that featured pregnant women walking the catwalk.  I'm not a fan of fashion shows, but I thought this might have a different angle.  Real pregnant women, flaunting their big bad selves and their huge round bellies. Pregnant celebrities, like Salma Hayak, showing off their baby weight.  Afterwards they would show them partying backstage, but instead of celery sticks and laxative martinis these real mommies-to-be would be chowing down steaks with their bare hands.  I couldn't wait!

    But come to find out Runway Moms centers around a modeling agency, Expecting Models. and these 'Runway Moms' are all professional models, who happen to be pregnant.  You know the type - the ones that only gain 5 pounds during their entire pregnancy and who, at nine months don't even look pregnant but just appear to be suffering from a mild case of post-lactose bloat. These women certainly don't look like they've ever had to pop the button on their  maternity jeans because the elastic panel couldn't fit across their barrel-sized stomachs.  Not that that ever happened to me. I'm just saying.

    You can see a segment here that's a hoot, where they feature a model, Jennifer, who, while not even appearing to be pregnant, worries that she's "too big." She's then filmed in her kitchen, lamenting the fact that she has to eat for her unborn child, but she's really only used to eating one meal a day. 

    Needless to say my heart breaks for Jennifer and her thin arms.

    I think looking and feeling great during pregnancy is important, but showing a 100-pound preggers model obsess about her weight borders on irresponsible. Don't expect me to tune in to 'Runway Moms' anytime soon, but when they feature an ordinary pregnant woman, big and round, resplendent in her granny panties and wearing a bra that resembles a rocket launcher, maybe I'll give it another look.


  • Tom Brady's Bunch

    Bridget Moynahan & Her Baby's Daddy

    Tom Brady's story was much more interesting when we thought that he had knocked up both ex- girlfriend Bridget Moynahan and current flame Gisele Bundchen, at the same time.  By "the same time" I mean the dualing pregnancies, not a fertile threesome.  Although that would have given the story the stuff of legends. Apparently those rumors were untrue, and he only dropped the ball once.  That's a football reference.

    This week Tom has been trying to turn his attention to the field, but guess what the media wants to talk about? You guessed it, the personal crap.  Brady is on record as telling the press that the pregnancy was "about him."  Under normal circumstancess I would feel for Tom Brady and his STDS (Stupid Things Dudes Say), but seeing as how he left the mother of his child on the sidelines, I have no sympathy. 

    I wonder if Gisele punched him for that. 



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