FameCrawler : Halle

Esquire's Sexiest Woman Alive Is A Mom

HerBadMother — Wed, 08 Oct 2008 11:46:00 GMT

And a damn sexy mom she is, too. Congrats, Halle.

(OK, Halle. You can ditch the Spanx now. Let the gut out. It's okay. BIG EXHALE.)

(No? A girl's gotta do sit-ups? DAMN.)

DAMN.

Source

Pregnant Celebrities: The List!

Whit Honea — Mon, 12 Nov 2007 02:03:00 GMT

There must be something in the water. There sure are a lot of pregnancy rumors floating around. For instance:

Brooke Burke following up Heaven Rain with a new baby. She should name the kid Chocolate.
Keira Knightley dresses the part.
Are the hormones making Britney Spears crazy?
Angelina Jolie is rumored to be pregnant. She is definitely naked.
Jeri Ryan is expecting a girl.
Jessica Seinfeld is not pregnant, but if she was she'd sneak cauliflower into the breast milk.
Desperate housewife Nicollete Sheridan is having Michael Bolton's baby. That's the word on Wisteria.
Apparently J-Lo and Marc Anthony are expecting someone new on the block. CONFIRMED!
Jordan does two things- show her stuff and make babies.
Giada De Laurentiis has a bun in her oven.
Xtina's finally admitted the obvious.
~~Bob Dylan~~ Cate Blanchett is with #3.
Nicole Richie is smokin' hot.
Ellen DeGeneres isn't just crossing picket lines!
Katie Holmes- I'm guessing the marathon disproved this rumor.
Halle Berry is enjoying the fruits of her labor, but not as much as her husband.
Do we hear the sound of little Posh feet? The Beckham boys could use a sister!
Julianna Margulies and a shotgun.
Jessica Alba? Again?
Katharine McPhee married and expecting?

See? That's a lot, right?

Halle Berry is Learning the Clichés of Pregnancy

Whit Honea — Mon, 08 Oct 2007 16:40:00 GMT

A pregnant Halle Berry sat down with The Insider and said all the right things.

The Stars Are Nothing Like Us: Halle Berry Gets Her Feet Massaged By a Really Hot Guy

sweatpantsmom — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 23:05:00 GMT

In case you're feeling smug because your husband took out the trash last week after only being asked three times, don't read any further. Halle Berry, expecting her first child with Gabriel Aubry, enjoys pampering sessions by her ridiculously hot boyfriend. Aubry says he's trying to help Berry through the early stages of her pregnancy by regularly massaging her feet and satisfying her cravings for pickles, bread and all things salty.

Yeah, but does he take out the trash?

[photo: Celebs and Bubs]

Halle Berry Doesn't Take No For An Answer

HerBadMother — Mon, 24 Sep 2007 16:33:00 GMT

Halle Berry reportedly told Oprah in an as-yet unaired interview that she took 35 pregnancy tests until she got a positive result.

That's a lot of urine. She says that she started testing when she suspected that she might be pregnant, which usually means a missed visit from Aunt Flo, but let's assume for the sake of the math that she started testing on or around the first day of the missed period. She had to have a gotten a positive result within a few days of that date - but let's be generous and allow for some confusion on dates and say that she might have tested early or whatever. So, what? Five days of testing? Five into thirty-five (scratching out the division on paper here... just a sec...) let's see... that's SEVEN TESTS A DAY.

Seven hefty streams of urine onto seven sticks, per day, for five days.

I hope she washed her hands.

I Hate to Say I Told You So, But I TOLD YOU SO: Halle Berry is Totally, Absolutely, 100% Pregnant

sweatpantsmom — Wed, 05 Sep 2007 18:45:00 GMT

After months of speculation and thousands of annoying posts by me, Halle Berry is finally announcing that she is pregnant. Every media outlet in town confirmed yesterday that Berry and boyfriend Gabriel Aubrey are expecting their first child together. I'm hurt that she didn't IM me beforehand, but I'm sure the thank-you gift basket will be showing up on my doorstep any day now. Halle, don't forget that I like Italian Roast coffee and tell them to leave out that weird trail mix that was in the last one.

Halle told Access Hollywood yesterday, "Yes, I am three months pregnant. Gabriel and I are beyond excited and I've waited a long time for this moment in my life." Speaking of waiting a long time for this moment, I first speculated that Halle had a bun in the oven way back in June, although Perez Hilton gives The Enquirer credit for breaking the story in August. So much for sharing my gift basket with you, Perez.

Labor Day Special #3: In Case You Didn't Hear Me the First Fifty Times, Halle Berry is Pregnant

sweatpantsmom — Mon, 03 Sep 2007 21:45:00 GMT

Here's Halle Berry, once again proving that she's pregnant with her telltale loose-fitting dress and large bag. The bag gives it away - everyone knows the only use for a big purse, besides covering a baby bump, is to hold a bottle of Tums and a hardback copy of "What To Expect When You're Expecting." I'm sure some of you still aren't convinced, but you're probably the same ones who don't think Loch Ness exists, either, even though I've seen some grainy, computer-enhanced photos to prove it.

But now I have real proof, "former Hollywood publicist turned blogger" Jonathan Jaxson claims that a friend of Berry's in Hollywood has confirmed that the actress is three-months pregnant. If that isn't credible I don't know what is, almost like hearing it from your mother's neighbor's aunt's podiatrist.

[photo: Flynet]

Bump Watch: Halle Berry, Stop Lying To Me

sweatpantsmom — Fri, 24 Aug 2007 13:05:00 GMT

Before you start getting all up in my grill, that isn't Halle Berry's pregnancy EPT stick that I took out of her trash. I've got a little more integrity than that. Besides, the last time I was digging around in there all I found were some torn Catwoman tights and a picture of Eric Benet with his eyes cut out.

But this picture is further proof that Halle is pregnant - just look at her in the second most popular pose of the pregnant celebrity woman, the 'Cradling The Bump of Life' pose.

For those of you who don't know, first on the list of most popular pregnant poses is the 'Awkwardly and Inexplicably Holding My Bag In Front of My Stomach' pose, which coincidentally Halle was caught doing earlier this week:

So Halle - girl, just break the news already. Don't make me come over there and dig in your trash.

[photos: X17, imnotobsessed.com]

Bump Watch: Halle Berry - Not Pregnant My Ass

sweatpantsmom — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 11:05:00 GMT

Like my prediction that rainbow suspenders would be making a big comeback this season, sometimes I'm wrong. But I still say I'm right about Halle Berry being pregnant even though her manager is saying otherwise, blatantly ignoring all of my ~~made-up crap~~ expert evidence. In fact, I was about to write a post about the National Enquirer confirming Berry's pregnancy when this buzz-kill of a story spoiled my fun. That's what I get for stepping away from the computer, taking off my astronaut diaper and indulging in a bathroom break.

But just remember how everyone around Nicole Richie insisted she wasn't pregnant, and now here she is hoisting her growing belly in front of her like a $700 Prada Bag. So I'm still putting my money on Berry and disturbingly-hot boyfriend Gabriel Aubry making their pregnancy announcement soon. And you might not want to throw out those suspenders just yet, either.

Halle Berry: You Can't Tell Me This Woman Isn't Pregnant

sweatpantsmom — Mon, 06 Aug 2007 21:35:00 GMT

The big dresses, the strategically placed purse - I'm telling you Halle Berry is pregnant. And I'm going to keep saying so until all you skeptics believe me. I mean, she may as well be walking around with an ultrasound taped to her forehead, holding a pint of Ben and Jerry's in one hand and a jar of pickles in the other.

So when the big announcement comes, don't forget that you heard it here first. And if it doesn't come, if it turns out Berry is just fond of big sundresses and carrying her purse in front of her, don't forget the healing powers of forgiveness.

Whoop! There It Is - First Sighting of Halle Berry in Maternity Dress

sweatpantsmom — Wed, 11 Jul 2007 19:15:00 GMT

Here at FameCrawler, we pride ourselves on jumping to conclusions. So when I saw this photo of Halle Berry leaving a CVS pharmacy a few days ago, I asked myself: Is she simply wearing a summery cotton dress, or has she donned a maternity sheath designed to hide her growing baby-belly from the prying eyes of the paparazzi?

Guess which one I chose!

I'll take it one step further by saying that my x-ray vision sees inside that bag and spies a bottle of Tums, an issue of Pregnancy magazine and a bag of Funyuns. If that doesn't scream 'knocked-up' I don't know what does.

Unless of course she's not pregnant, in which case FameCrawler accepts no responsibility for this outrageous pack of lies.

Do Halle Berry and Gabriel Aubry Have A Baby On The Way? Everybody Wants Some Of This Gene Pool.

sweatpantsmom — Wed, 13 Jun 2007 14:05:00 GMT

Should these two even be allowed to mate? Or would the resulting offspring be so perfect as to not be viewable by the naked eye? Halle Berry and her model-restaurateur boyfriend, Gabriel Aubry, are rumored to be expecting a child together. Not surprisingly, three modeling agencies are already fighting over who gets to sign the fetus.

The rumors started when Halle was recently spotted buying infant clothes as well as requesting jeans three sizes too large for her. Of course, amongst us mortals those same two things would be called "buying baby gifts after having lunch at In-N-Out."

If the baby talk is true it'll be nice to see Berry, who disclosed details about a suicide attempt in an interview earlier this year, have some happy news in her life. The X-Men star had a turbulent marriage and bitter breakup with musician Eric Benét a few years ago and also an earlier failed marriage with baseball player David Justice. Hmmm...baseball player, musician, model - Berry sure picks some serious real estate to hook up with. Uh, Halle - if this thing with Gabriel doesn't work out, and I hope it will - you might want to consider dating an accountant.

[source: Life&Style Weekly, print edition 06.18; photo: justjared]