FameCrawler : celebrity haircuts

S-Fed Keeps It Straight, 4 Realz Y'all

Whit Honea — Thu, 28 Jun 2007 12:32:00 GMT

Sean Preston Federline, according to Us Weekly, hasn't been affected by his momma's crazy. They quote Britney Spears from her website "[I'm] feeling more at peace. Now recently I find with my children that I want them to have that feeling all of the time."

I have no idea what that means. I'm not sure if Britney does either, or she might actually try to spend some time with them. Then again, maybe that peace comes for S-Fed when Mommy ain't around, in which case he does have that feeling all of the time. That's heads-up parenting right there.

Britney Spears is/has a Crazy Mother...

Whit Honea — Tue, 26 Jun 2007 21:03:00 GMT

According to AHN, Britney Spears is filing a restraining order against her mother. She is taking this step to keep her mom, Lynne, away from her two sons. She claims that her mother is abusing prescription pain medication and Britney doesn't want her spending time with her boys, Sean Preston and Jayden James.

This concerns me, because who would be with the boys then? I see hundreds of pictures of Britney every day, and do you know why we don't use them here at FameCrawler? Because she never has her kids with her. She has Uggs, nipples and big, stupid glasses, but no babies.

Not only is she mad at her mother for having an alleged problem, but she is deciding to shun her rather than take the steps to help her like Lynne and (gulp!) K-Fed did, sort of, when the tables were turned.

She blames her mom and K-Fed for putting her in rehab, yet she still lets her boys (and her girls too, nudge, nudge) go over to their daddy's place without concern. Which is, of course, concerning. As you can see, I have nothing but concern for this family. Actually, I really am concerned for the boys. I hope someone steps up and provides these kids some shelter and a bit of sanity.

The scary thing is I'm looking at you K-Fed.

Gwyneth Staggered by the Crushing Weight of Her Convictions

BadKitty — Sat, 23 Jun 2007 16:09:00 GMT

Oh no, not that kind of convictions, like Paris or Nicole. The other kind, like being holier than thou and aggressively vegan and wan. It's Gwyneth, silly, not someone cool or hip. She doesn't drink or do anything that could get her convicted of a crime. Or you know, happy.

She's hobbling out of some kind of salon. I hope to GOD it's nails, not hair. If she looks like that after a hair appointment, we need to invent a new low on the Frump-o-meter for whatever she looked like before.

At least she got an afternoon out. Do you suppose Chris is at home, feeding organic fruit leather to Apple and Moses, counting the minutes until she returns and they can do their afternoon sun salutations as a family?

Get well soon, Gwyneth! Everyone is counting the seconds until your next Sliding Doors. We miss your fake English accent. It's so much better than Madonna's.

What's the Limit on TomKatSuri Posts in One Day?

Whit Honea — Tue, 19 Jun 2007 20:02:00 GMT

Katie and Suri hitting the beach. Katie is not doing anything to discourage the pregnancy rumors. That suit is only worn by two kinds of women, old or pregnant, and despite her hair, she isn't old.

Suri, Daughter of a Preacher Man

Whit Honea — Tue, 19 Jun 2007 19:05:00 GMT

Katie, the bump, the mom shag, Tom, and Suri, are seen here getting ready to descend to our level. Apparently Tom "Top Gun" Cruise has reached the highest level of crazy, and can, and may, perform wedding ceremonies.

The top level is called 'Clear' or 'The Larry Bird' to some people. Some people being me and Michael Jordan.

I actually performed a wedding ceremony for some friends this past summer, so I have some advice for Tom: Stand on a phone book so the people in the cheap seats can see you. They're paying good money you know.

Lock Up Your Couches: TomKat May Be Preggos Again

Whit Honea — Tue, 19 Jun 2007 17:02:00 GMT

Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes, might, MIGHT, be expecting again. The source for this is The Sun, which is like saying the source for this is the guy on the subway. They are going with all of the staples here, the bump, the desire, the haircut.

Stay tuned!

Posh, Kate and Tom Watch Sports, Show Off Mom Hair, Subvert Gender Stereotypes Everywhere

HerBadMother — Mon, 18 Jun 2007 13:34:00 GMT

The Beckhams and the Cruises had a little family outing together on Saturday, joining forces to cheer on David Beckham at the final Spanish league game of the season.

There are a great many jokes that one could make about Scientology and matching haircuts and Tom's three-piece suit (not, I think it's safe to say, standard wardrobe for sporting events) and the fact that each of them looks like they'd rather be purging Thetans than attending a soccer game, but aren't we all getting a little sick of making fun of Posh and TomKat?

No?

Okay then. I'll ask this: if you swapped outfits between Tom and Katie - put the pouffy-sleeved dress on him and the ugly three-piece suit on her - don't you think that it would look like he and she had just swapped places? Everyone jokes that Katie is looking more and more like Posh (who is herself, it seems, trying to look like her husband), but I think that she's looking more and more like Tom. That, or Tom is looking more and more like her.

I'm not judging. Just pointing my fingers and laughing.