I can't believe we are already into the second week of June. I wish summertime would go more slowly (or last longer) because even though I still have to work full-time during the kids' summer vacation, I do find that I have considerably more relaxed time with them in general during these warmer months because they aren't as busy with school assignments, plus it stays light a lot later each day after I get home from work. I love it.
But as much as I'm enjoying spending more time with C, J and E in recent weeks, I'm really missing child #4 - my eldest. Seventeen-year-old H left for boarding school (summer school to be followed by his senior year) at the beginning of June. I am missing him terribly, but I'm really proud of how well he seems to be adjusting and how hard he's working. But it's totally bizarro having one of my little monkeys (I still think of him that way even though he's nearly 6 feet tall) missing from the household for the first time. I often find myself with the unsettling feeling that I've forgotten someone or something...and then I realize that it's H's absence that is making me feel this way. His siblings miss him a lot, too. Phone calls and letters help, but it still feels kind of weird around here at the moment. I am still adjusting. We all are. I know he would have gone away to college in only a year anyway, but having him living away from home for the first time just feels like a really meaningful, pivotal moment in our family's history. It's big.
Here H is at a stop on the last leg of his trip to his new campus, which is located on the other side of the country. He and his Dad and grandfather made the trip together, and I think they really enjoyed the three day, three generational cross-country adventure they had to take to get him there.
And here he is right after they arrived on campus.
J's summer started off with a bang. She got to spend an entire week in NYC with a church mission trip. J had been in New York briefly before on a couple of occasions, passing through to go to other places. But this was the first time she'd stayed in the city for any length of time. And suffice it to say that she fell in love. She says NYC feels like the place she's meant to be, and that she intends to go to college there, and live and work in Manhattan after she graduates. My budding fashionista especially loved the shopping (and yes, even on a church volunteer trip, she managed to do quite a bit). She's a fierce bargain hunter, and she came home with a suitcase full of designer knockoffs - clothing, jewelry and accessories - and with almost half of her spending money left over.
Here she is modeling some face painting she had done while volunteering with young children at an Episcopal church in the Bronx.
And here she is modeling an array of her NYC shopping finds.
After she returned from her trip, she announced that she wanted to poke two new holes in her ears, adding to the single ear piercing she talked me into letting her get when she was only 7. Her father and I decided we were okay with it, so yesterday she headed out to the mall, returning with her ears looking like this.
She says the top one is pretty sore today, but she's happy with the results. My mother was appalled that we let her do this, but I'm a big believer in picking your battles. This seemed relatively harmless; I mean, she wasn't asking to get a tattoo on her lower back or pierce her tongue - so I was okay with it. I'm sure some of her friends' mothers may be disapproving of this parenting leniency, but to me, two extra ear piercings seem like a fairly harmless flight of cosmetic fancy for a budding 9th grader.
E has been loving summer so far. He was soooooo ready to be done with school. He was practically vibrating with happy energy on the last day of class. This is a boy who needs plenty of rigorous daily physical exercise and play - preferably outdoors with other boys - to be at his emotional best. Long hours in a classroom setting are a struggle for him; he longs to be free to climb trees and wrestle and dig in the dirt. So that's mostly what he's been doing for the past few weeks. He also finished up his lacrosse season strong, with a final win of 9-0.
Here he is with some pals on the last day of school.
Here E and his 7 year old cousin M are the other day as they got ready to head out on a bear hunting expedition. That's our dog Leo that E has tied to his waist, and as you can see, the boys wisely armed themselves against potential bear attack with a mop handle and a walking stick. The bear they were hunting had been spotted in a tree in our very urban neighborhood the night before (no, really!). Unfortunately, E and M did not find him before the authorities did. That same day, the bear was captured (and subsequently euthanized) about than 2 miles from our house :-(
Here E is up in our neighbor's tree.
He's been playing with his little sister a lot lately; here they are swimming together last weekend. She finds him more entertaining than any toy. He never stops finding clever ways to amuse her.
And at the end of these busy, tiring summer days, big brother and little sister enjoy falling asleep, together with me, in "the big bed." After he's dead asleep, Jon or I move E upstairs to his own room, which is getting harder and harder to do as he's getting bigger. But I plan to keep carrying him as long as I can because you never realize when it's the last time you will pick your child up and carry him or her to bed. That milestone happens without you realizing it. And I plan to enjoy this little parenting ritual with my sweet youngest boychild as long as my arms and his weight will still permit.
You will note that C has a bottle with her in the photo above, as well as in most of the photos below. That's because she is utterly and completely attached to her "boppy." Regular blog readers may recall that I made the really hard, conflicted decision to wean her from breastfeeding when she was 12-13 months old (she had been taking supplementary bottles along with the nursing since 6 weeks because I had to return to full time work at 8 weeks). I made this tough call on the strong advice of my specialist doctor, who believed that continuing to nurse was playing a role in my miscarriage issue. I have previously breastfed a baby through a pregnancy, but I was 11 years younger at the time. My doctor felt that if I really wanted to try to have one more successful pregnancy at 41 years old, I needed to lower all risk factors. So I weaned her. And I still miscarried again (and again). The breastfeeding obviously had nothing to do with the problem. So I have some significant regret over my decision to end breastfeeding so early, but C never really seemed bothered in the least. She loved - and continues to love - her boppy. So I now have one of "those toddlers" that people talk about - a walking, talking child who still carries a bottle with her everywhere. I am starting to note the disapproving glances and snarky comments about the bottle. I know how Katie Holmes must have felt (well, without the nasty tabloid scrutiny of her parenting) But the whole toddler-with-bottle thing is a topic I'll address in a future blog post... (UPDATE: I have now written the "why my toddler still takes a bottle" blog post.)
But back to the summertime photo essay.
As for C, well, she is enjoying summer just as much as the rest of us. She especially likes the fact that she's getting more playtime with her older siblings and her cousins. We took care of NC most of last weekend because my sister is recovering from knee surgery, and the girls had a blast together. (As for me, well the experience of caring for two toddlers mostly by myself - Jon was sick - for that long of a stretch gave me a fresh appreciation for all of you mothers of multiples. I bow down to you.) We try to get C and NC together to play at least twice a week.
Here they are playing the piano together.
And here they are on the way to E's lacrosse game on Saturday. Chasing both of them around the sidelines and trying to keep the two of them off the field (they wanted to "help" the players) was a bit like herding cats.
In Bell Buckle
Bathing in the sink at Jon's office
This is C and me with my newborn cousin and my niece in Bell Buckle last weekend.
At the park after a rain
Hanging with her big sistah on a lazy, no-homework summer evening
A little toddler 'tude
So there you have it: a snapshot, or, rather, a number of snapshots of our summer thus far. We've not really got anything big or exciting going on as a family this summer. We aren't even going to take a proper vacation (although the kids are going to do a couple of trips with other family members).
But I think we'll just enjoy the day to day hanging out together without a lot of Big Things Happening. That sounds pretty appealing after a crazy-busy fall, winter and spring. I intend to take a less is more approach to the summer of '09. More popsicles and watermelon on the porch, and less rushing around. Less worry about the disheveled state of my house. More focus on reading some good books, and walking the dogs around the neighborhood at the end of the day.I definitely want to spend more time with the friends I haven't seen enough of during this recently completed season o' excessive stress and rain and busyness.
"Go slow" will be the family motto over the next few months. We all need to recharge.
(But next year, I've gotta tell you, I am going back to Bonnaroo ;-) )
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