Time Flies

re: Time Flies

steffmarcusky — Sun, 31 Aug 2008 18:52:42 GMT

I was so happy reading about your experience with Ty in this post, because it's the same as what we're going through (except he doesn't speak as much as Ty) until you dropped the bomb on us - I am crushed. I am so sorry, but I do hope that you will find another child for your forever home. For now, I grieve with you that you will lose him, but I hope the little bit of time you have with him is wonderful.

I'm so sorry.

re: Time Flies

Monica — Sat, 30 Aug 2008 04:24:41 GMT

I am so very, very sorry.

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Kelly — Fri, 29 Aug 2008 14:25:31 GMT

I'm not a big crier, but I cried at work when I read this.

I'm not a big pray-er (more spiritual than anything) but I want to for you all.

The thought of you all not having Ty with you forever is enough to make me crumble, so I can't even imagine how either of you feel.

You did a GREAT thing by being there for Ty when he needed you, but I'm sure it doesn't make this pain go away. I can't imagine my life before my son (who is the same age as Ty) and could never imagine my life without him.

Wish I had some eloquent words or something comforting to say, but this f'ing sucks. I just hope the "process" really does what's in the best interest of Ty, but I have a strong feeling that staying with the two of you is it.

re: Time Flies

bfw — Thu, 28 Aug 2008 17:14:05 GMT

your story is so touching, I wish for the best for all of you. reading your blog makes me even more angry that my state is trying to make it illegal for anyone who is not married to serve as foster parents or to adopt. who knows what could of happened to Ty if the two of you didn't come along.

re: Time Flies

Marie Eve — Thu, 28 Aug 2008 14:57:23 GMT

My heart is completely with you... A miracle did indeed happen: the one that took Ty away from an unhealthy environment and put him into your loving care.

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mombo — Thu, 28 Aug 2008 13:11:04 GMT

I will second everyone's comments and keep you all in my thoughts. What you must be going through sounds uniquely heartbreaking. I am so sorry.

That said, I have to say that this post was beautifully written. My own son is about Ty's age, and I totally relate to the Tasmanian Devil image. But the whole metaphor of time as this heavy thing gaining momentum, propelling you toward a future that sounds exceedingly difficult...it's just very beautiful and sad all at once. You could have easily said, "This sucks, d*** it!" but instead you crafted a poetic response to the most awful situation. Thank you for sharing this.

re: Time Flies

knockedup — Thu, 28 Aug 2008 03:33:54 GMT

You have provided - and are continuing to provide - so much love to Ty, and I believe that, no matter where he goes or when he goes, that will give him strength and comfort. You are amazing fathers to him.

re: Time Flies

TheFosters — Thu, 28 Aug 2008 02:41:04 GMT

Thank you to everyone for all the supportive words.

Hillary: We are learning how complicated the whole process can be. The state and DSS generally feel that it is in the interests of families (including the children) to keep everyone together and that's the goal they have been working towards in this specific case. We aren't convinced that decision is in Ty's best interests, but there's little we can do.

Dan in WI: We've been trying to process our own feelings about this for about three weeks now and keeping a bit quiet about it all.

CAMamma: We will definitely have a part to play in Ty's transition home. We want to lessen, as much as possible, the impact of what will undoubtedly be a traumatic experience for him, and that will mean working with the family. We don't know what will happen (or what we want to happen) once the transition is over though.

Melissa: We try to hold on to the belief that there is a reason for all of this, if for no other reason than the fact that Ty needed love and care at a very crucial time in his life.

-- D

re: Time Flies

Melissa — Thu, 28 Aug 2008 01:14:35 GMT

I'm really sorry to hear this. You've been a wonderful gift to Ty during what was a difficult time in his life. I do believe God has a reason for all things...if that's any comfort.

re: Time Flies

CAMamma — Wed, 27 Aug 2008 19:53:34 GMT

No idea if this is a possibility for you, but I understand more and more foster families are trying for openness to maintain some stability in transition and afterwards. Perhaps you can maintain some link to Ty that way? My heart aches for you. I wish you luck if and when you re-explore adoption. We went that route directly. I don't know if I could foster, but you guys are amazing role models.

re: Time Flies

EG — Wed, 27 Aug 2008 19:39:24 GMT

So sad for you guys.

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Dan in WI — Wed, 27 Aug 2008 14:46:50 GMT

I'm sorry, I didn't realize the extent of how the legal proceedings were going. You guys are in my thoughts, and you're the best and most nurturing parents a kid (and especially an active toddler!) could have.

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Hillary — Wed, 27 Aug 2008 13:30:20 GMT

Oh! I'm so sorry. Why won't you be able to adopt? I just don't understand this system. This is so sad ... you'll all be in my thoughts.

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1happymom — Wed, 27 Aug 2008 12:49:23 GMT

My heart just got crushed reading this post. I'm so sorry. I will keep you all in my thoughts and prayers. You have given Ty more than you will ever know, and he will carry you with him always.

re: Time Flies

CFJ — Wed, 27 Aug 2008 12:08:40 GMT

I am so, so, so sorry. How terrible...

You have given Ty such an unbelievable gift. We need more people like you in this world, people who are willing to give everything they have to take care of someone else, for however long they are needed.

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chyna823 — Wed, 27 Aug 2008 00:42:44 GMT

I'm hoping for a miracle...

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Clementine — Tue, 26 Aug 2008 23:20:33 GMT

Oh god--seriously, I'm crying at the computer. My heart breaks for you. I don't know what else to say except that I'm just so sad to read this post.