I always fantasized about having my own personal "Jeeves" or "Winston" or "Worthington" waiting on me hand and foot. I should have just cut to the chase and gotten pregnant because babies soon become toddlers soon become "mommy's little helper(s)."
Here is mine taking a quick break from servitude:
(As if you people haven't been bombarded with a thousand zillion photos. I know but this one is particularly cute.)
Today Archer swept the entire house. Last night he hand-fed me an entire salad including garbanzo beans and specks of goat cheese. It may have taken an hour, but he was there every drop of the way.
Yes. The day has finally arrived: Archer waits on me. Honestly, the timing couldn't be better. Mama needs some TLC, these days and boy, has she been getting it. Woohoo! It's my turn, bitches!!!
My turn for what, you ask?
My turn to be swaddled ... with blankets and pillows.
My turn to get spoon-fed.... even if couscous ends up in my eye.
My turn to watch someone ELSE sweep the floors... even if said "sweeper" is sweeping the dogs in the face instead. Thought that counts right?
My turn to be wiped.... um.... thanks, Archer but no thanks. **Maybe I
will post more on this issue in the future. Right now, it's just way
too embarrassing. I don't care what anyone says, potty training is
mortifying.**
All in all, he's a pretty cool servant. And a VERY cute one to boot:
(Another photo. Don't be mad.)
You know what they say? They're never too young to serve.
Because one day, hopefully many years from now, Archer might have to wipe my ass and spoon-feed me and spot-remove my old stained nightie so it's good he's getting in some practice now.
Thanks, Archer.
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