Since two of my four children were born after I turned 35, I can totally relate to what Ondine Galsworth has been going through
as chronicled in her essay "Older Wiser and Pregnant: What it Means to
Have a Baby at an "Advanced Maternal Age." It means: YIPES. It means:
testing. It means: discrimination and weirdness in the reactions of
others. It means: "Why aren't you 23?"
More importantly, however,
for Ondine, it means: security, confidence, trust. It means things
that, for her, came with age. Things that will in turn make her a
better mother for having them. Sure, there's the increased risk of abnormalities in the baby
that comes with advancing maternal age (my youngest has Down syndrome,
so I'm no stranger to statistics), but women are having babies later
and later these days so the rewards must still be greater than the
risks. I know they have been for me.
So
isn't it time to forget the stereotypes we've been holding onto, that
motherhood and fertility is just for young women? We don't simply dry
up after 35! Women are more free now than ever before to make
different choices as to when and how to raise a family. It's time we
adjusted to that and supported these choices in a more meaningful way.
