Yes, it is
hard being a new mom. So when you get frazzled, perhaps it's time to turn to celebrity moms for inspiration, and find out how they stay so fresh and put-together in spite of the obvious stresses of caring for a newborn. Alyson Scott, stylist of celebrities and founder of StyleChic
says there's things we civilian moms can do to "look and feel well-rested".
Okay, wait. We are taking our cue from celebrities... So I'm guessing most rely on a live-in nanny, a full-time chef, a housecleaning service, tons of money, a personal trainer and a professional makeup artist to keep famous mom looking and feeling paparazzi-ready at all times. Is that what Alyson recommends we get?
Nope. Alyson says we ought to slather our babies with Vick's BabyRub. Let's all pause and let that one sink in. Because "the gentle
Vicks BabyRub formula contains petrolatum and Aloe to leave your baby's
skin feeling soft... Plus, Vicks has been a trusted
name for more than 100 years, so you know that you are being a good mom
when you combine this with a mother's loving touch."
Maybe I'm especially dense, but I wonder how rubbing stinky vaseline on my kid is going to make me feel less stressed out. Or how it would make me look like a celebrity. This is what we call: Cheap. Product. Whoring. And not even skillful whoring, to tell you the truth.
Alyson's other tips are: go for a hike with your baby, and let neighbors or friends help out. Alyson missed an opportunity here. Try, "If your muscles are sore after your hike, try rubbing Vick's BabyRub on your infant to make your own legs feel better. And why hand your baby off to friends? Let your Vick's BabyRub jar watch the kid for a couple hours while you get in some 'me' time. Leave the baby with a product you've trusted for over 100 years. That way you'll know you are a good mom for buying the stupid-ass, overpriced balm we are trying to sell you by getting a celebrity stylist shill to endorse it."
Apparently they believe new moms are not only stressed-out, but also idiots.
