For anyone out there raising a Highly Sensitive Child, reading this post by Jenna Forrest may give you some insight into what childhood is like for your little one (if you haven't read perhaps the most helpful tool in any HSC's parenting arsenal, The Highly Sensitive Child by Elaine Aron, please, do it now, It has helped me and my little HSC tremendously).
Jenna writes, "I was dramatically sensitive, ultra-shy, pretty picky and painstakingly conscientious... My pastime of choice was studying the mysterious intricacies of the world from the safety of the shrub outside my front door... Being
most anywhere else put me in a panic. I tried hard to disguise my most
blatant shortcoming — eruptive emotion — but failed time and time again... My sentiment just didn’t want to be buried. It always would find the fissure in my willful mental dam..."
Sound like anyone you know? For HSCs, childhood is overwhelming at every turn - everything from outgrowing a beloved t-shirt, to welcoming a sibling, to having a poster on the wall moved, can send them into a spiral of confusion, panic, and overwhelming anxiety. The best analogy for life is like for an HSC that I've ever heard came from Elaine Aron: Imagine that a "normal" or non-highly sensitive person at an orange sorting factory - they will have 3 slots for sorting oranges: small, medium and large. Now imagine an HSC at the same factory - they will have 15 slots for sorting the same oranges: small, medium, large, extra large, bumpy, smooth, bruised, heavy, stem, no stem, etc. HSCs simply process more details - in any situation - than the average person. When they walk into a room, they take everything in: sights, smells, sounds, what people are wearing, how light or dark it is, pictures on the walls, who's there, who's not there... they get easily overwhelmed because their little brains are working overtime, and their little nervous systems are, too. This is why they crave, and truly need, so much downtime (and often naps or "time outs" well into their school years), and why they melt down so easily: they are simply worn out from noticing, and feeling, so much. It requires diligence on the part of an HSC's caregivers, to guide them in managing their emotions, and to remove them from overstimulating situations, before it becomes too much for them to handle.
If you are raising an HSC, there are many resources out there for you to use as tools in understanding what your child is going through, and how to help them understand it, themselves: the book mentioned above, this blog, and this website are excellent starting points. Hyper-sensitivity is a very real thing, affecting millions of people - if you have noticed that something is "different" about your child, but can't put your finger on what "it" is, take this quiz - it may help get you and your little one on the road to understanding, and ultimately, accepting, life as it is for your family.
