Strollerderby

I appreciate your perspective, but disagree with your conclusion.  I think that sending people home with formula *does* jeapordize breastfeeding success, and, it sends the message that the medical establishment encourages formula feeding.  Most moms I know (even the die-hard breastfeeding types) tucked a package of formula in the cabinet just in case there were problems, and it's not like formula is exactly hard to come by.  I absolutely support the idea that new moms need way more support to breastfeed successfully, but capitulating that most women will end up formula feeding anyway doesn't offer that.

Agree with Anna. I found the pro-breastfeeding approach at the hospital where I delivered to be a total turn-off. Guess what? BFing is still best. At times I have found it painful, annoying, and every other thing under the sun, but it worked out for me and that's worth the sleep deprivation, the Nystatin, and feeling for four weeks that I was tethered to my baby by my incredibly sore nipples. I absolutely agree that women need more real support - the support I see women getting is fakey fake crap meant to shame them into breastfeeding without giving them any real help when they have problems. But that's on the people providing the support, not your boobies.

In the end if you're a woman who tries and cannot make it work and you switch to formula, you are feeding your child and you shouldn't feel bad at all. But if you're switching to formula because you want some sleep... well, what the frick did you think having an infant around would be like?

I pump. We started out breastfeeding like a champ, and things fell apart for a million little reasons. We've not used formula, but having that can, and even having it made up, decreased my stress level enough that when I wasn't keeping up (because a growth spurt coincided with a cross country move - and stress does bad things to milk production) I knew that worst case scenario there would be a formula feeding, I would get caught up, and we'd be back on track.

Part of what turned me off the most was in those early days (when it was actually going well) was how many people (Pediatrician, nurses, lac consultant, literature) used the word DON'T. Don't use a bottle, Don't go  more than three hours, Don't let him fall asleep while eating - I wish they would present it in an informative way - "If he goes longer than 3 hours, you may have more difficulty establishing a milk supply" - Telling an overtired me "Don't" just brings out the defiant teenager in me.

Do I wish we were nursing and not pumping? Yes. Would I ever honestly haul out my 32J breast in public and nurse. Never. Never. If we were nursing (and never pumping) would I be at home alone with the baby all the time, going crazy? Yes.

So in the continuum of breast vs formula there are more feeding variations that can be helpful - pumping still gets them the milk even if it isn't the fore/hind balance - but education about how to use a bottle of pumped milk to support breastfeeding (excellent article I can link if you want), or use of a foley cup or a syringe or an eyedropper - but no one really ever talks about that.

Bless you Redsy for acknowledging that we are smart enough to make the right choice for our families.

I had Cara at the local military Base (Tucker's in the Navy) and they are hardcore about breastfeeding.  They DO NOT send parents home with formula samples and seem to look down on mothers who choose to formula feed.  I understand why they don't provide formula, but I don't think that it's the health care provider's place to make such an important, multifaceted decision.

On the other hand, I agree with Anna.  Having that formula on-hand could very well keep a mom and baby from getting a good start with breastfeeding.  Breastfeeding is hard and sometimes it really sucks.  There were a couple of times when I know that if I had formula in the house, I would have used it and probably would have stopped breastfeeding.

Mixed bag, huh?  Damned if they do and damned if they don't.

I agree with you Redsy that there needs to be a support system in place before medical institutions implement "boob only" policies.  If Tucker hadn't supported me 110%, I don't know that Cara and I would still be going strong after nine months.

www.TasteLikeCrazy.com

I support the ban on free formula gifts for the reasons already stated, but also because I don't think hospitals should be in he business of doing marketing for the formula companies. That is a conflict of interests, I think.

A hospital should only promote health positive initiatives (and in comparison, breastmilk wins out over formula and formula samples have been shown to negatively impact breastfeeding success, in the statistical analysis) and lose their neutrality by unconsciously advocating for a particular formula.

"Considering the speed at which most women find themselves digging for Advil, formula, and ice picks.." I'm sure you meant "ice packs," but ice picks more accurately describes the feeling.

I'm three weeks into this. Had a beautiful birth followed by severe maternal hemmorage and an emergency hysterectomy. Breastfeeding has not been easy on me. During our week-long hospital stay my baby fed about 5 times a day, which was manageable. But when I was chastised for her not returning to birth weight and told she should be fed every two hours, the level of commitment felt impossible.

So, yes, we supplement with formula using Breast Flow bottles. The formula makes her gassy and constipated, and my milk supply is mediocre. I feel guilty about all of these things and am loathe to visit another lactation consultant who raises an eyebrow at my nipple shiels and tells me I'm doing everything wrong.

I completely agree with mamaloo. Free formula isn't anything but a marketing gimmick, and it's inappropriate for hospitals to be shilling for formula manufacturers. But if this country's health establishment REALLY wants to promote breastfeeding, they should send home vouchers for free lactation consultation. Better yet? Lactation consultants should be covered by health insurance.

Agree with Anna. And question some one who rails against zeolotry, yet seems rather zeolous herself.

I agree with mamaloo, hospitals shouldn't be sending home formula because they are heavily subsidized by the companies that make it.  I don't feel like I can trust the recommendation of someone whose paycheck depends on how I choose to feed my child.

I'll be interested to see if this tactic works, because I don't think it will.  Having access to formula is, IMO, way down on the list of reasons why women choose formula or stop breastfeeding.

Amen amen amen amen amen, Rachel. I wrote about this topic this week as well.    I also agree with Dawn about the Don't's. My breastfeeding class made me less likley to breastfeed, because I actually asked how soon I could give a bottle (I am a work-at-home freelance-writer mom and cooulnd't afford to take a lot of time off) annd how soon I could get on some degree of a schedule, and in both cases the teacher acted as if I'd asked if it was okay to beat up the baby JUST a little bit. I think more emphasis on the fact breatsfeeding does NOT have to be all-or-nothing, either boobs on demand or rigid bottle scheduling, would help enormously.

Oh Yolanda.  What a hell you have been through, and to have looming feelings of potential bf guilt on top can't help.  My advice may be worth what it cost, but here goes:  Lactation consultants can be great or they can be tremendously short sighted, prioritizing the "breast is best" ideal over all else, including the emotional well-being of the mother.

I had no idea how much breast feeding difficulties can drag people down until I saw dear friends go through it.  I watched as a brilliant, confident woman who welcomed motherhood was turned into a fearful, sad, and guiltridden creature, not by post partum depression, but by the damn lactation consultants.  As someone who happily, joyfully, handed my daughter to my husband every night for a supplemental bottle of formula for the fifteen monthes I breastfed (despite the disapproval of some bf partisans), I tell you this, there is no blueprint for this.   Love your baby, treat yourself as gently as possible, and feed her whatever works for you, supplementing or exclusively one or the other.  It will all work out fine.  She will grow and be happy, you will watch her grow and be happy.  All will be well.

Try changing formula is you haven't already, and as for the gas (which may have come at this age anyway, formula or not), with her on her back, hold her little feet gently in one hand and roll her legs up until she is in something resembling a fetal position.  This usually allows any built up gas to escape.  Good luck, good luck, good luck.  You've got a stranger rooting for you.

I was more than a little thankful for the formula samples, and I got them from both of the major brands.   When it became obvious that despite drugs, herbs, wonderful lactation consultants as flummoxed as me, dietary changes, sacraficing a goat, and pumping 8 times a day that  my breasts were never going to produce more than an ounce or two a day I was grateful for any formula I did not have to pay for.  That was one serious unexpected expense.  

PS:  Yolanda, I understand.  I used the Medela flask system to feed my daughter until her appetite outstripped its capacity.  So for five months I had her at the breast even though my breasts were basically empty.

Right after my daughter was born, I tried formula and breast milk.  Man, formula tastes like shit.  For no other reason than taste, they should ban that shit.

I don't get it. Why shouldn't people say breastfeeding is best? Yeah, formula is second best. I mean, I had to have a c-section or my kid and I would both have bit it, but that doesn't mean vaginal delivery isn't best in almost every case. Just because I had to have a c-section doesn't mean everyone should pretend c-sections are just as good as vaginal births for most moms. And just because society screws over moms or some moms have medical issues doesn't mean formula is as good as breastfeeding.  

Maybe what is needed is a society that thinks and teaches breastfeeding (and pregnancy and child birth) is NORMAL. Why is it we live in a society that thinks nothing of breast implants but women get kicked out of stores, off planes, etc for breast feeding.  There is something totally fucked up when Victoria's Secret kicks out a woman for nursing.  Helloooo????  Does anyone see the irony??  Yooo hoooooooo.....

You know what I'd like?  If hospitals gave formula's in single serving packages.  After my son was born, the hospital gave us a huge gallon of formula.  When we got home, we put it in the cabinet and he had breast milk exclusively until one day when I was out and my husband was home alone with him.  He opened the formula and gave him a bottle.  After that, the gallon of formula was only good for 48-hours.  The only way a baby could drink that much in 48-hours would be if he was exclusively bottle feeding.  

We gave the gallon to our neighbors who were exclusively bottle feeding.  Otherwise we would have had to dump it down the drain, which would have been a horrible waste of food.

By giving formula in such a huge container, the formula company sends the message, once you start on formula you have to formula feed exclusively, they same message that turns people off the La Leche League.  It doesn't have to be all or nothing and even for most breast feeders it is not.  

My baby was basically a lazy sucker and we had to supplement with  formula in hospital.  I'm glad for this, but I also tried to bf and take millions of herbs etc. Guess what? It didn't work.  I think there is enough guilt associated with not being able to bf. My baby is happy, healthy and ended up being exclusively on formula from 4 months. No we didn't count on having to do this, but at the same time it was not helpful for me to hear that I was a 'bad' mother who didn't try hard enough from complete strangers. I think motherhood is difficult enough, why not try and make it easier and stop already with the guilt trips!

Fabulous comments all! And now my confession: I'm still breastfeeding my 2 1/2 year old daughter.   I used formula with my twins under duress.  So I feel like I understand both sides of the issue.

Thank you for your thoughtful comments on the issue.

One thing that no one mentions is, what if the baby is not gaining weight despite nursing for more than two hours at a time? My son nursed continuously, but was not back to birth weight by two weeks. I have flat and inverted nipples and he had torticolis which was not diagnosed untill he was four weeks because it was a minor case due to birth injury (which was the doctor's fault). And to get a good milk supply I had to use not just a ton of herbs but two rounds of Reglan, which makes you incredibly tired.

I went to three lactation consultants and had multiple sessions with each of them, all three gave up and said that formula is sometimes the only option. Right now I am pumping and on some days we have to suppliment with formula.

They should stop perpetuating the myth that breast feeding is always possible. Without formula my son would not be the healthy happy baby that he is.

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My say - give them the free formula!  Give them security of knowing that their child can still have adequate nurishment on hand if NEEDED.  No one is forcing them either way.  You go home with a boob, why not go home with an alternate?

My story - I too thought breast feeding was going to be this wonderful and glorious experience.  How hard could it be, a baby and a boob, that's what God made moms for right?  Wrong.  No one told me how hard it could be.  I went to 3 lactation consults, public health nurses, and LaLecheLeague meetings.  I nursed every two hours but he was still failing to thrive at two months.  No amount of continuous BF helped him gain weight.  Formula worked for him.  End of story.  

My point - New moms need to be educated that not everyone is going to have this amazing BF experience and that it is OK to give formula.  Why else would so many children be running around happy and healthy if formula is so evil?  I had a woman sit next to me, whip out her boob and look at me in disgust for feeding my baby a bottle.  I went home in anger.  She had no idea the pain I went through during my son's first 2 months of life.  What works for one doesn't for all but don't make me feel guilty about using my FREE formula.

What do you think is really going to happen to the kids who are formula fed? Do you think that you can tell the difference? How about five years from now? Two years ago I stressed and stressed over the guilt I had for giving up, and now my kid is perfectly healthy and happy. Why did I beat myself up like that? I was made to feel that if I didn't breastfeed my kid was going to be at the hospital 24/7 and stupid to boot. Neither of those things happened. Two years ago these debates made me feel guilty and angry. Now I just don't understand why they are perpetuated. Breastfeeding is nice. But it's not the end all be all. For most first world kids, do you really think the benefits are even noticeable?  

I don't have a particular problem with banning the bags, but the ban is just lip service. It does next to nothing to address why a lot of women don't breastfeed or give up in the first couple of weeks.

And of course it's easy to ask how women couldn't know that they would get little sleep with an infant. But there's a big difference between talking about sleep deprivation (and all the other fun things that go on with your body after having a baby) and actually living through it.

My son is adopted and I was STILL urged as a middle-aged, non-pregnant woman to attempt to stimulate lactation so I could breast feed.  Didn't do it, bonded beautifully with the little being and was actually sad when he outgrew the late night feedings.  I agree that nobody can tell the difference between and among healthy children as to who was breast fed and who wasn't.

Balance in all things is what is truly best, for infants, children and parents.

Good grief!  People talk like breastfeeding is always a choice.  Guess what?  Sometimes milk does not "come in."  

And at 2 am, when my baby hadn't had a meal in four days, and we decided to give him formula, thank heavens for the free pre-mixed stuff.  Since I was *definitely* gonna breastfeed, I didn't actually have any other formula in the house when I needed it.  

Strangely, the class I took never recommended having formula on hand in case the breast refused to put out.

And if you feel judgmental towards me, please note that I didn't give up until after two (expensive) visits from a lactation consultant.

Breast is best in the same sense that

I think any competent lactation consultant would tell you the first rule of establishing a successful breastfeeding relationship is to make sure the baby gets fed.  If mom is having trouble breastfeeding, it doesn't help if the baby is starving and screaming.  It makes it worse.  And it makes you feel like a failure.  And it makes you doubt yourself as a mom and a woman at a time when you're incredibly vulnerable.  I know.  I speak from experience.  I breastfed both of my sons, the second for more than a year, and those bottles of formula tucked away in the cabinet saved my life while my babes and I were working out the breastfeeding and pumping the first few days.  I find the "remove the formula because moms will make the wrong choice" attitude patronizing and insulting.  The real impediment to breastfeeding is the judgment we face from society and (still) some doctors, not a free can of Similac.  Puhleeze.

Plus, I just like free shit.

come on, its marketing, pure and simple,is why some hospitals still send home formula packs, not out of the goodness of the heart. If you want that stuff, you should contact the formula company yourself. You should hear the formula rep at our hospital, she is now a wreck because "we are not using enough formula"

The companies want your business, gals.

So should the hospitals do away with the take home bags altogether? Because practically the entire thing is marketing, not just the formula.

Speaking only for my wife, I find it terribly insulting to imply that women are such weak minded individuals that even the mere presence of formula will "make" them give up on breastfeeding on a whim. As Sarah mentioned above, if the samples are the only formula brought into the house, obviously the mom is making a very sincere effort to breastfeed and is turning to the formula in desperation to either a) make sure her infant doesn't starve to death or b) to maintain her sanity -- either of which is in the best interest of the child.

I totally agree with this article.  It seems nowadays that everyone wants to stick their nose into your business and this is a perfect example.  I have two children, and with my first, I breastfed for a few weeks.  With my second, I breastfed for about a month and I half.  I also (gasp!) supplemented with formula as well with both of them and do I feel bad about it?  No, not one bit.  In the midst of bringing a new life into the world and not knowing what in the world you are doing, it does not help to have people look down on you because you happen to decide that breastfeeding is not for you.  In fact, some people on certain message boards say that they think women who chose not to breastfeed are "selfish" because they "are obviously not thinking about their babies" and, I love this one, "they just didn't try hard enough".  Ok, tell me one woman who has walked in my shoes and who knows what my life is like.  The militant breastfeeding advocates need to worry about their own lives, and that includes hospitals who are now deciding that they will not give new mothers formula bags.  Let the mothers decide for themselves what they want to do, because personally, the opinion of others is not going to make one whit of difference in how I raise my chidren.

Amen to your column. I had no idea when I made the educated decision to use formula the people who would be attacking and the vehemence and illogical arguments I would encounter. I finally learned that to some breast is best... to others a happy and healthy mom is best.  End of story.

Thank you for writing this.

Amen Lisa. Well said.

A to the F*ing MEN. I am SO SICK of this shit being crammed down our throats. Those that do the cramming never had to deal with the devastation and absolute humiliation of not being able to nourish their child. As the old saying goes, until you've walked a mile in my shoes...

I invite any of the BFing crammers to sit with me so I can describe the torture that was breastfeeding. I took my newborn to a f'ing chiropractor to realign her from the trauma of child birth so she could properly latch, after consultations with pro-BF pedi and ENT specialist. Among a litany of other things. The day I made peace with formula feeding and stopped exclusively pumping was the best decision of my life.

If I have future bio children, I will most likely go straight to formula.

The same hospital that will or won't send home formula ought to have enough sense to send a "lactation specialist" around a few days in a row to be sure mom and baby are doing okay.  You make it sound like you give birth in a drive-thru and drive right home when done.  That shouldn't be the case.

Oh, everybody shut up already and mind your own business.

Yolanda,

I feel your pain. I had a preemie with no suck reflex so if the choice is a feeding tube, baby starves or formula, I opted for formula and some pumping. Not exactly what we had planned, huh?

As for gas, my daughter was queen of gas. We finally found a few formulas that worked: Try Nestle Good Start or Alimentum if need be. Try Good Start first, cheaper. Alimentum is spendy but a lifesaver. Dr. Brown's bottles work well on gas too. Please give it a try. I also squirted some Mylecon drops in her bottle with Gripe Water. A little mixture that gave us all some sanity.

As long as

a) New parents clearly get the message that breastfeeding is OPTIMAL (which is the medical consensus) but that it can be difficult and formula is perfectly fine too

AND

b) The hospital provides FREE lactation consulting to ALL new parents

Then I see NO problem with free formula (although I still think it should be private label - i.e. just branded with hospital name, not a private company).

But if new parents don't get the proper info and training but just get the free formula, then it may be viewed as an endorsement.

i agree that we need to get post-partum care and also appropriate leave from work (alot more than we get in this country) in order to do the job of parenting a newborn.  i have a reading suggestion:  naomi wolfe's "misconceptions".  also, i REALLY appreicate the admission in the article that some women might not feel the bliss.  i recieved so much pressure to feel the bliss of breastfeeding and heard "are you enjoying breastfeeding?, isn't it wonderful...blah blah" and no, i haven't felt the bliss, thank you.  i have nursed my son for almost 7 months now and i haven't had the hormones of peacefulness, clam, bliss, etc., but i have stuck through it through many painful experiences of plugged ducts and mastitis, and i don't want some la leche league person congratulating me or anything, i just did it because i felt it was best for my son.  

The unfortunate thing is that Breast feeding is best but it is very very hard to market and on top of that our society has turns "Breasts into Boobs"

I agree 100% that hospitals should NOT be providing formula to every baby born there. They should provid it for the babies that need it while they are at the hospital. Same goes for diapers and every other baby product. They should have on hand what is needed at the hospital for those that didn't bring their own and that's it. When you go home you get what you want or need yourself.

As for

New research and a little experimental surgery indicates that severe behavioral problems associated with ADHD may be "cured" with removal of the tonsils . In kids with ADHD who are also experiencing sleep difficulties due to sleep apnea, snoring

I appreciate the perspective...but a few thoughts:

Not even someone as funny as you are gets to toss around "Nazi" like that without at least being challenged once.  It is a cheap way to put down a group.  Personally, I think Nazi comparisons should be banned in writing unless the group is actually engaged in genocide or at least eugenics of some sort.  Might I suggest Stalinists?  Doesn't have the same ring, I suppose.  Maybe cultists?

Second, although I am concerned that breastfeeding advocacy can traumatize moms who cannot or choose not to breastfeed, I think that is mainly happening in the higher socio-economic levels of society and therefore gets more play on the blogosphere.

In the majority of cases, it is formula that is being shoved down throats (metaphorically the mom's, literally the babe's) with free samples, glossy brochures and posters, and lots of coupons.

I'm all for free stuff--but how about some free breastfeeding stuff to balance things out?  I guess the problem is bfeeding just isn't good business for the sponsors who are paying for the swag.

But yes, some real support for all moms, regardless of how they choose to feed their children, would be nice.

Yolanda,

I feel for you. It sounds like quite a lot for the body to handle - the stress of the hysterectomy can't help with the milk production.

I had my baby four weeks ago and we had a hell of a time with the breastfeeding with severly sore nipples. Where was the gas and air for that! We were lucky and had a really compassionate lactation consultant but we also felt the pressure not to allow ourselves to use bottles or nipple shields. When I finally cut myself some slack things slowly got better. It helped for me to take a day or two of bed rest drinking lots of water and expressing each breast at least once a day to stimulate my milk production.

I am glad I stuck to it as there are definately moments of bliss with the breast feeding which I would never had known about. But, if I hadn't started on the bottle and embraced my beloved nipple shields there's no way I would have got there. You've got to do what feels right for you.

As my dear friend advised me - what matters is that your baby is well fed.  If you are not enjoying breastfeeding, she will inevitably feel that reluctance and that pain and you will just spoil moments that could be just as lovely watching her guzzle a well-filled bottle of formula or expressed milk if that is possible.

Good luck!

i hate to say it but i'm just gonna say it: the average american woman giving birth in america might as well go ahead and snag up the free formula.  chances are she's already arrived in triage at 1 cm with "excruciating pain", swaddled herself in a scratchy hospital gown like she's sick, got nice and loaded up with pitocin and an epidural and anything else they'll throw at her, and had her vulva chopped up like hamburger meat so she can make her drug-addled "attempt" to push.  nature is an illegal alien in the USA: until your friendly neighborhood ob-gyn gets her deported for good, why not just line up for the scheduled c-section?  put it on your insurance card!  that cute little scar will tuck nicely underneath your bikini.  awww... hell, why not just keep the baby in the petrie dish?  that way you won't get fat, girls.

I realize hospitals vary, but I did have a free session with one of the lactation consultants before I left the hospital. It was just part of the routine, like the hearing tests and car seat checks.  She talked to me about technique, tips, positions, and had me put the baby to the breast.  As did my OBGYN.   I was also encouraged to put the baby to the breast as soon as they were done stitching me up from delivery.  

The hospital also had a Breast Feeding Support 'Warm' Line.  If you were having trouble, you'd call and a lacation consultant (or nurse, if the lacs weren't available) would either take your call or call back within two hours to answer your questions.  There was also a free support group for breastfeeding moms (led by a lactation consultant).

I also did pay for one additional consultation, and received a lot of free extra attention via phone and at/after the support group meetings.

It really is too bad that some other hospitals don't offer that sort of support  (and too bad for me that there was nothing any of those lovely people could do to help in my case.)  

So, hurrah for Tucson Medical Center, and especially their wonderful lacation consultants.

p - i think i understand your assertions, but they're so clouded by crude and hateful imagery that i really don't see why you bothered commenting.  it's not like anyone will take a comment like that seriously.  

Mama Luxe - since we're nitpicking, i find it sadly funny that you would seriously recommend "Stalinist" as a replacement for "Nazi".  i guess you're not aware that it's commonly accepted that Stalin's regime killed MILLIONS of people through execution, privation and resettlement.  but i guess those people don't count?  or is it just that you haven't made up a "rule" yet for Stalinist comparisons in writing?

en.wikipedia.org/.../Stalin

I think in the end the mother knows what is best for her baby. Just follow your instincts. I has Mastitis just weeks after I brought my baby home. I thought I was going to lose my mind being sick, very high fever, engorged and going through PDD.  I made the decision to give my son formula supplement and breastfeed while I was sick. My doctor did not agree with what I did but I felt like it was the right thing to do. My baby was happier, I got better faster and we then we got back on track again with the breastfeeding.  

I had my baby in France and they don't send you home with these welcome packages that you are talking about but I did have a week long stay in the hospital and the midwives all told me the same thing over and over again that I should follow my instincts and that I know best.  That was the best advice I received and I apply it to everything I've done since I've become a mama.

I'm not sure why there is such pressure to breastfeed. If you give the boob or the bottle you're making a decision that you think is best for your child. And in the end, that is all that matters.

Rachel, I agree totally.  I took all the classes, even read the Nursing Mother's Companion book before giving birth and was determined to be the one woman in my group of friends who succeeded at breastfeeding. What I didn't count on was having an emergency c-section after 26 hrs of labor and a son who was in NICU for four days. That does wonders for a Mom's milk supply, let me tell you.  I suffered unbearable guilt when two month later I still couldn't talk my breasts into supplying all the milk my son needed, even after seeing a lactation consultant.  Yes, the breast is best, but do we have to make a new mother feel like she is harming her child?  I truly believe that most mothers know what is best for their baby and if pulling out a bottle of formula at 2am calms a screaming baby and allows Mom to get some much needed rest so she has the strength to try again, then so be it...Everyone else should keep their opinions to theirself and stop throwing guilt around like a dirty diaper!

K1--As a history teacher I am well aware of such--but thought Stalinist fit the totalitarian message better and is not as overused and is not as much of a conversation stopper.

Oh, and I was kinda joking to fit Redsy's approach.

But thanks for being so patronizing.

Seriously, though, comparing anyone to Nazis when genocide or eugenics is not involved is overdone and not worthy of Redsy's good writing.  She got my point, even if you did not.

I can definitely see where you're coming from, but I also disagree with sending home formula with new moms.  Just like so many other things people do or use just because it's there and it's "easier", it might be easier for a stressed-out mom to reach for the formula before giving breastfeeding another try.  Maybe she's sitting there all stressed out, thinking "if this doesn't work, I've got that formula" and sabotaging herself by jumping up for the formula only moments before nursing would have worked for her.  

Maybe I'm being too simplistic, but we all know the blah blah about breast being best, and there are also other things that nobody mentions.  Like the fact that you can roll over in bed and pop out your boob and feed the kid and not have to ever get up.  Or that it's completely 100% free, and what else about kids can you say that about?  I breastfed because of health reasons, sure, but it was also cheaper and easier and required no preparation, no remembering bottles or powders or anything.  I breastfed partially out of sheer laziness.

Of course there are people who can't or don't want to breastfeed, and I can understand that and I don't think they're bad mothers.  I just think that if you leave out the formula, if you give nursing a solid chance, you might be pleasantly surprised.  And if not, who cares?  Your baby gets fed either way.

I am proud to say that I did not breastfeed my son.  Not because I had no breasts, developed mastitis, or had to go on chemo the day after he was born.  I had absolutely no desire to jump on the bandwagon, do something that didn't feel natural or right TO ME, cause myself to get less sleep and be the only one feeding my son at all hours of the night, or to never truly know how many ounces of nourishment my son was ingesting.  Yes, I had postpartum depression.  No, my milk would not have been very nutritious in the month following birth when I was barely eating or drinking.  But why should I need an excuse or a story when I tell people, especially other women, why I chose formula over the breast?  Breastfeeding is lovely, nutritious, and wonderful for many babies and their moms.  But you just can't can't can't take the studies that have been done and throw them in the faces of us formula feeders.  Not should there need to be sides when it come to being a parent and making choices that are best for our own families.  Babies who are breastfed tend to be a part of more affluent families...anyone consider they might just be smarter later in life because of their exposure to things that the family income allows as opposed to what they drank as infants?  Correlation is not causation.  Furthermore, my formula fed son had been ten times healthier than his breastfeed buddies over the past 2 years, and is smart as a whip.  Being a mom is hard enough without people throwing more guilt onto us.  Don't beat your child- don't smoke in the car- read to your child.  Beyond that, don't tell me breast is best unless you are driving the safest car on the market, feeding your child only organic foods, living in the state with the cleanest air quality, and saving up for your child's Ivy League education.  If all of those apply, come throw stones at my house.  If not, leave us all the hell alone!  I love that my baby drank formula and there is no guilt or shame in sticking those cabbage leaves in my bra the minute I got home from the hospital.  I shouldn't have to be dying of cancer to feel like it's ok to formula feed my baby.  DIDN'T WANT TO BREASTFEED-DIDN'T BREATFEED-GLAD I DIDN'T BREASTFEED!!!!!!

Dina-I agree with you 110%!  Basically, everyone else should mind their own business and worry about their own children.  Great post!

Wow; as an American-Australian citizen living in Australia I have to say I am grateful I had my first baby here instead of there. I know not all American hospitals are corporate sell outs, but that _is_ kind of the lay of the land there these days. Perhaps giving small, label-less containers is the answer. But then, who would subsidize them. I'm pretty cynical about formula companies pushing their wares (and big corporate marketing in general), but I know this topic is much more complicated than that. Anything to do with babies is personal, I don't care how political the debate gets, it's always personal at the end of the (exhausting, emotional, sleep-deprived)day. I'm breastfeeding, but it's been bloody hard work, and at various low-points I don't know if I would have resisted, had there been a shiny tin of formula sitting in my pantry. I'm just grateful for the support of my husband, and also for living in a country with a socialized medical system. I'll never forget walking out of the Royal Hobart Hospital after 5 days of world class medical care, and realizing there was _no_ bill forthcoming. Unreal! I also had more free, ongoing lactation support than I could shake a stick at.

As it should be, in America and everywhere.

I find it annoying that activists are preventing hospitals from giving out formula. I view the real militant breastfeeding activists as akin to the people who stand outside abortion clinics showing pictures of the fetus and telling women they are evil. I personally think abortion is wrong, but it's not my business to lecture other women. I think breastfeeding is better, but I don't like the "I know better than you" tone many breastfeeding activists take with women who bottle-feed. I find it patronizing, and I resent it. My boobs are my business...and only my business.

Am I the only one who had cans of formula magically show up in my mail?  I must have signed up for a baby magazine or something.  Even though I breastfed, I kept them just in case.  

Anyway, the swag bag is questionable for the conflict of interest and product placement reasons (coming from the hospital = expert sanction).  But really, not everyone can breastfeed.  That's why there used to be wet nurses.  Ok, we all know breastmilk is best, but formula is probably 95% as good.  And formula is way better than starving.  

I think someone else mentioned this, but this whole thing is probably a public health initiative aimed at poor/inner city women where formula feeding is much more common. (Ever seen an inner city store where the formula is in a locked case?  Weird.)  But then they have to overcome the fact that WIC provides formula.  

I agree with this article.  I do breastfeed, but I also formula feed.  My baby breastfed for his first feeding, but after that he was groggy and didn't feed well.  The nurses gave him an ounce of formula and guess what?  It perked him up and he breastfed successfully after that.  YAY FORMULA!

Now I am back to work and let me tell you it's very hard to continue breastfeeding.  Pumping twice takes an hour away from my day.  I'm in a constant state of stress and guilt about not pumping enough or not working enough.  I am pushing on, but I am so glad he takes both breastmilk and formula, both breast and bottle.  If he didn't, I would have no choice but to put him on formula exclusively.  Once again, YAY FORMULA!  My family simply could not survive without my salary.

So much pressure is put on women to breastfeed when so many of us also have to work.  Thank goodness we have options.  This judgmental attitude has to stop.  

I was happy for my swag bag.  I too love free stuff, especially when I was on maternity leave and only getting 70% of my salary!

P.S. I was completely formula fed as a baby, always perfectly healthy, an A student and I absolutely bonded with my mother.  I donated my kidney to her in 1997 and she's my best friend!!!

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News flash: BREAST IS BEST!!!  It's absolutely the best, and formula manufacturers admit it!  Yes, I admit in the first few weeks it's tough because you have a newborn that needs fed every 2 hours or so, so you only get maybe 1 1/2 hours of sleep at a time, sometimes 2 if you're lucky.  But hey, that's why there's a wonderful little thing called MATERNITY LEAVE!!!!  You can sleep any time of the day you need to to make up for the sleep you don't get at night, and babies do tend to sleep a lot, just not all at once. Formula may be a golden elixer for the mother, but it's not really all that great for the baby.  Unless you like giving babies cow's milk that's been taken apart and put together again with things like ground up fish eyes and algea.  Yeah.  Tastey.  But fine, if that's what you want to do, do it.  Whatever.  That's your right and NYC is not taking it away from anyone.  It's just saying if you want to use it, go buy it yourself.  And believe me, if a woman is that sleep deprived, she will.  Then again, she could just do like I do and bring her baby in bed with her, so she and baby can get some sleep.

You know what else is best? Having a healthy BMI, walking at least a handful of steps each day, and not eating at a fast food joint twice in 24 hours.

But dammit, that's MY right - - MY CHOICE - - so why should anyone else be able to take my right to a choice away?

And seriously, women? Stop being so critical of each other. I thought we moved on from all that judgmental-ness when we graduated from high school. Please?!

My mom nursed in the 70s, and took all manner of crap for it. Most of it was in the passive-aggressive form of "Oh... you can TRY it... but it won't work out." She bought me three books on breastfeeding the day I told her I was pregnant, so I know from BF support/pushing. We started with poor latch, negative weight gain, and the "You should give your baby formula because he's losing weight - you can choose not to, but you're a bad mom if you say no" talk from doctors in the hospital and his pediatrician. I said F that! What got me through sore nipples and thrush into a successful BFing relationship (with a baby who's showed the doctors with their freaking formula-driven weight charts that mom's milk is packing on the pounds just fine) is the absolute determination I had to make it work* and the fact that my husband had eight paid weeks to spend at home with me, so all I had to do was feed the baby. (Lucky? Yes. Thank you, California.)

[* I want to be clear that when I say I had determination to make it work, I am not saying that for women who aren't successful, it's on them - I hate that attitude. What I mean is that I had my cesarean incision reopened and spent my first eight weeks as a mom with a gaping hole in my belly, and I knew if I failed at BFing while I was caring for a goopy disgusting wound I would get depressed and seriously so. So I bit down on the pain in my nipples and nursed and nursed and nursed. That's all.]

What gets me now is all the "Breastfeeding is HARD... you can try it, but..." talk. It sounds so much like what my mom got, and stacked against the studies that show how few women stick with it, it makes me sad. It makes me sad that it worked for me and I can't find women to talk to about that. Every nursing group I've been to is packed with women who supplement or who don't BF. Online it's all women with problems. It makes me sad for them - it worked for me, so why couldn't it for them? It's not like I'm a saint and deserved all this luck. And then I read about breastfeeding nazis and it makes me mad for two reasons: a) nazis? come ON! and b) I would like to witness someone giving crap to a women buying formula or giving her baby a bottle, because I know how to make my baby spit up and I'll do it all over their sanctimonious face. Food is food, give me a break.

Are there women out there who are successfully breastfeeding and harbor no judgment about formula moms? Sometimes I feel so alone.

Have faith in yourself...If mothers were TRULY valued in the US we would not be embarrassed/afraid to whip out whatever sized breast we have, wherever we may be and nurse our children. Oh and by the way...BREAST MILK IS FREE!!!!

Katie Price, aka Jordan, thinks that "only a certain kind of person could handle (her) knockers" and that certain kind of person is not a baby. Which is to say, Ms. Jordan will not be breastfeeding . "I don't," she says, "want

Hey, Boob Mom...if you want a place to chat nursing in a supportive environment with both moms who have been successful with it and moms who need more support (but neither of which who put down moms that don't bfeed), send me an e-mail and I'll invite you to a mom's community with a cool bfeeding group.

My e-mail: mamaluxe at gmail dot com

I found out about this discussion from Redsey.  I really think that women are capable of deciding for themselves what's best for their own children and themselves.  Whether or not an 8 ounce free can of formula is in a diaper bag does not change the fact that we have insufficient resources for nursing moms and as a society we do not really support nursing moms; from the fact that it is still illegal to breastfeed in many states, to the fact our maternity leaves are very short in the US, not to mention there are not many clean and comfortable places for women to breastfeed in public as well as at work, etc., there are many obstacles that have nothing to do with a free formula sample.  I actually just talked about this on the Mike and Juliet show this past Friday.  flexibleparenting.com/.../blog-round-up-on-morning-show-and.html

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Honestly, my view is if you are committed to breastfeeding you are going to do it even if you have formula in some giveaway bag. I feel that there is NO harm in giving the formula what so ever. Will it possibly discourage some breastfeeding, YES, but I am pretty sure if it wasn't that formula that did it - it would be the formula that hubby bought at a store. Just give it in the bag and let the family figure out what is BEST for them.

I think that your statement that the nagging, guilt-ridden language of the breastfeeding "nazis" (of which I'm sure you would consider me one!) needs to go. On the other hand, there is a bigger issue at work here when our hospitals are serving as corporate lackeys passing out formula to every new mother at the behest of the formula companies. Formula is not the Great Evil, but nor does it have a place being given even to mothers who are committed to breastfeeding, where it has the *potential* of sabotaging that relationship.

Also, there needs to be a clarification: moms CAN still get all the free formula samples upon request, they're just not given automatically. This is quite different than hospitals putting starving babies and exhausted mothers out on the street.

People who use the word "Nazi" and breastfeeding in the same breath sound so incredibly defensive that their arguments lose their power.

As Erin K notes, formula is still available!  The hospital is not banning formula. If you want to feed your baby formula at the hospital it is available to you, just ask. If you want to buy a truckload of it when you get home, you can do that. The corporations will love you, you'll get on their mailing lists, you'll be mailed more samples & coupons.

What the hospitals ARE doing, is stopping the promotion of a marketing campaign from occuring within their walls that is in conflict with the World Health Organization (WHO), and much irrefutible medical evidence.  No one is removing a Mom's choice. And, contrary to a comment noted above, it is different than allowing other marketing to go on (i.e. the "goodie bag" hasn't been removed all together, just the formula), because the other products or services are not in conflict with medical research and the WHO.  Don't you want to believe that the medical professionals giving you advice and affecting your life in such a strong way are biased by research and science and not by money and politics?  

I can choose to feed my older children a salad or fast food, we can play video games or baseball, we can use antibiotics or homeopathic remedies. These are all my own choices as a parent, but they occur within MY walls, not a public place dedicated to health.

I wonder what the reaction would be if free samples of fast food burger and fries were given to children who visited the hospital. Would it not be seen as horrible that the hospital would allow such an inferior food to be marketed to patients?

Every time I read accounts of women struggling with breastfeeding and pain and pumping, only to have the entire endeavour go tits up (so to speak) after they return to work when their baby is six weeks old... well, it really pisses me off. Talk about having the odds stacked against you. And then to have GUILT piled on top of that? Fuuuuck.

I live in Canada. Our healthcare system has its flaws, sure, and our government is far from perfect, but here's what you get when you're a new mother in Canada:

:: the delivery of your choice, either with a midwife or in hospital, fully paid for by our collective taxes

:: a community nurse (also paid by taxes) who comes to your home at least once after you give birth, to check in on you and your baby; that same nurse, who also functions as a lactation consultant, will come back as many times as you request, even daily, until you feel good about breastfeeding and any other issues you're having

:: a year of maternity leave with a base income, paid by the government

:: laws that state in clear terms that nursing in public is a legal activity, and that anti-breastfeeding discrimination is an actionable offence

When I had my son Sam just over two years ago, I struggled so much with nursing, even WITH all this support. In the end, we made it work, but I didn't experience fully pain-free breastfeeding until Sam was six weeks old. I can't even imagine how frustrating it would be to have to disrupt the fragile success I'd finally achieved in order to go back to work.

Most of the women I know nursed for the full year of maternity leave, then weaned at or around the one-year mark. Everyone seemed pretty cool with this, and by that time, their kids could drink milk instead of formula. Because I have a flexible work schedule, I was able to keep nursing Sam until he weaned himself at 19 months. I feel pretty good about that, but I don't kid myself that I would have been able to do it without a lot of PRACTICAL support -- not empty lip service and preaching.

Seriously, you guys need a revolution. I see how few rights you have, and it makes me furious on your behalf. Nursing is natural, sure, but that doesn't mean it's EASY. You need as much help as you can get, and if it's not offered to you, you have to demand it.

I am a proud Formula Feeding mother who has taken a lot of slack for formula feeding. With my first, the negative vibes, the remarks that I was a bad mother for giving up BF were enough to make a mild PP depression even worse. With my second, I didn't even care because in my book, what is best for you is best for your baby and it's a whole lot better in the end for everyone when a feeding is full of love and happiness, whether it's breast or bottle. Breastmilk might be the better substance, but is it the best thing for the baby when the mom is crying at every feeding and wanting to throw the baby out the window?

In our modern society where women have so many demands- to be a good mother, to succeed in a career, to have hobbies, to care for our husbands, to be intellectual, to travel, to be up on computer technology- with just that alone, we are exhausted. Add, BF on top of that and those who do it should get a gold medal! But, I do disagree with Boob Mom that those who give up BF to get some extra Zs are doing it for the wrong reasons and they shouldn't have had children in the first place. I am proud to say that one of the reasons I gave up BF was because the extra sleep Formula Feeding gave me allowed me to spend more quality time with my newborns and enjoy the awake time instead of being completely exhausted and stressed out and I don't think my intentions were in any way selfish or that I shouldn't have had kids. If I can cut corners in some areas so that I can put more energy into others, I will, so that our whole family can live in peace.

That said, I am not so much for giving out free samples at the hospital for the sheer waste of it all. Many women just throw it away and the formula thrown away should go to women who really need it. Trust me, those who want to turn to formula in a desperate moment will find a way to get it. Sure, it's a marketing scheme, but isn't everything these days, even breastfeeding, in a way? And what about the free Pampers they give out? I cloth diaper but in no way judge those who use disposables- that is their choice and none of my business!

I am presently pregnant and nursing a 21 month old. I have a 5 year old as well. I nursed her for only a few weeks and I whole attribute this to my ENTIRE support system at the time. EVERYONE around me told me that I should just supplement with formula because we were having such a hard time. I *KNOW* in my heart of hearts that had my support system been better, we would have succeeded just like I have this time.

So to the gal a number of posts back who wanted a militant bf-er to walk in her shoes...I have and I still say that breast is BEST (um, that's a proven statement, btw) and the majority of women give up far too soon. that is not to say there aren't those who cannot altogether-whose milk doesn't come in or whathaveyou, but formula isn't even second on the list. Human milk is. provided there is a milk bank near to you or you can find a distributor. Human milk was made for human babies, plain and simple, just like cows milk is for calves, pig milk for piglets, etc. We MAKE SURE on our farm here that if a nursing relationship with a baby animal is hurting, that that relationship gets established. IT takes more than a few days...sometimes weeks and months before it happens but we-collectively-want everything NOW when we want it and to be instantly gratified. There is no instant gratification with breastfeeding. Supplementing and pumping right away can not only induce nipple confusion but can also diminish your supply right away. the only way to get an adequate supply going to is exclusively breastfeed until not only your supply is strong, but so is the feeding relationship.

as for lack of sleep...I haven't experienced that as we are a bedsharing family.

I can tell you first hand, having formula around the house DOES interfere with breastfeeding.

When I had my first child, I was so gung-ho about breastfeeding. My own mother did not breastfeed any of us, but it just seemed like the right thing to do; natural and free (for a young family on a budget!)

My son latched on right away, and everything went well for a couple days. Then, the feedings came more often, and more irregularly. The formula feeders, including my own mother, said "He's probably not getting enough milk!". I was chastized for nursing in public, so I couldn't leave my house due to the frequent feedings. In my time of need, I turned to one of my "gift" bags in my time of need. My son stopped nursing in a matter of weeks.

Bottle feeding was not easier. Instead of feeding my son in bed, I had to go downstairs and prepare a bottle. They always had to be refridgerated. And the cans of ready-to-feed were unaffordable. Even powdered put us in the poorhouse. That "gift" wasn't enough to get us through more than a couple of days.

I had Logan in December of 2004. I decided to give breastfeeding another chance. He didn't have a good latch. We had to work on that. I had blisters and bleeding, but I was determined to make it through the first two weeks recommended as a trial period. I gave my "gift" to the food pantry. So on those late nights (always the hardest time), I couldn't give up. I made it through, and LOVED my breastfeeding experience, which lasted over a year. Late night feedings led to co-sleeping on most nights, and I loved waking up with my little guy nestled next to me. I never had to get out of bed, never lost any sleep. We breastfed everywhere: at restaurants, at the mall, at the beach. Most of the time, no one even saw anything more than a mother holding her child close. And I paid no mind to anyone who didn't like it, including my own mother. To be truthful, seeing other nursing moms in action gave me the courage to try again. I hope that I was able to do that for someone else.

As for the formula, we never bought an ounce. I started pumping  a little bit each day, and when I went back to work, I had a freezerful for my husband to feed our son. He said it was easier to prepare than the powdered formula. Just run it under warm water! We saved thousands.

I'm pregnant again with a little girl, and I look forward to breastfeeding her, too. And if I'm offered any "gifts", I will politely refuse.

If you need formula, go out and buy it. If you think you're going to need it, have some at home before you even have the baby, like you'll have diapers and baby clothes ready.

Hospitals shouldn't be in the business of marketing formula, period. Leave that to the pharmaceutical companies.

Hmmm. Well I think that sending out free formula is a great way to do business. You get just enough to get you hooked and dry up your milk, then you have to buy the stuff all the time. It is hard to relactate and most women won't do it. It isn't great to switch brands on a baby so you are stuck buying the stuff and it costs alot! What a great way to get customers!! Then feed them the line that breast feeders are zealots and "nazis" and that if someone mentions breastfeeding around you you should feel shame. Then don't offer real support and suggest that LLL is a bunch of jerks and not really helpful. Then ban commercials for all nursing but pump up the formula commercials.

Pit mothers against each other on talk shows and make it "nasty" to breastfeed. Make it so those "zealot" those "Nazis" have to have laws passed to breastfeed. Then bash them at every turn. Now you have underminded the whole concept of nursing a baby. You say things like "I was shamed into nursing" or "Those LLL are jerks and looked down on me for using a bottle" Then say you can't nurse and use formula it is either one or the other. Suggest that if a woman wants to work outside the home she can't nurse. Suggest that if you use formula then your baby will sleep better. Suggest having you newborn sleep alone, suggest that dad can't really be involved UNLESS he is doing the feeding cuz that is all there really is to a baby.. not holding and cuddling and changing diapers, just feeding.

Make a world were breasts are OK as long as they are sexual. BUT damned if you use them to feed.

Pretty soon you have families choosing formula over the breast because we have lost our knowedge of breastfeeding. There is no support and your scared to nurse for fear of looking like one of those "nazis" or afraid of being embarrassed into leaving a place. Shame the breastfeeding mamas. Make them feel like if they so much as mention how much better (but really not better, just natural) breastfeeding is then they are shaming formula feeding moms.

Keep them quiet and fill your pockets with cash. Don't worry about the future. don't worry about wasted resorces, don't worry about illness. Blind everyone. Hire great spokes persons... famous people... doctors, nurses, hospitals.

GREAT JOB!!

Heather in Tucson Mother of 5 babies!

PS for the record encouraging someone to nurse does not a Nazis make. Where else is it ok to use that term?? Would you call another group Nazis if they pushed their cause? Is there "Gay Nazis"? But it is OK to call a mother a nazis for nursing?? Do you even know who the Nazis were/are?? For real? Do you?

my biggest complaint in the formula vs. breast debate is this....

i don't give two figs if you stick a plastic tit in your kid's mouth to feed him, but don't shoot me the evil eye because i whip out a real one. they both contain food. stop acting like i'm insulting you and being a boob nazi. i'm just feeding the baby. if you're reading more into it than that, that's your guilt talking.

as for banning formula, i say go for it. formula should be used for times when it's medically necessary. if your boobs function, why pay hundreds of dollars for fake stuff? just because it's an "inconvenience" to you? if feeding the baby is an inconvenience, then so is changing it's diapers, singing to it, playing with it, bathing and dressing it....all those things take time out of your busy schedule, but you don't shirk those responsibilities, right? and if it's a question of sharing responsibilities among family members and allowing others to "bond", i much prefer our trade-off...i nurse the baby, he changes the diapers, we take turns bathing and dressing and singing and playing. fairness and bonding all around.

i agree with whoever said society is screwed up with their values, encouraging women to make their breasts bigger for their hunk o' man meat, while simultaneously telling them it's disgusting to use them for the function they were intended. when, exactly, did our priorities take up residence in our pants?

Want some free formula? All you have to do is buy something at Motherhood or sign up for some sort of parenting or pregnancy listserv. If the formula companies get wind that you're a mom or mom-to-be, they'll be bombarding you with free formula samples. Why should a hospital send it home with you? Are they in the business of promoting health and safety, or peddling formula? I am tandem nursing 2 kids and I can't get the formula companies to stop marketing to me. They even somehow got my phone number and called my house to ask if we were happy with our formula. Their surveys don't even allow for "I don't use formula" as an answer.

Have fun in your land of bottle washing and heating and cooling and preparation, I'm off to lounge on the bed and tandem nurse my children with some nice zzzzzs included for everyone.

Google the WHO Code for marketing of breast milk substitutes or the baby friendly hospital initiative.

A lot of these posts are offensive, but the comments that stick out to me are the women who say that they got sleep because they co-sleep...so duh you stupid moms why can't everyone do that, right? I tried to breastfeed in bed, but could never do it. My c-section hurt too much, and then I couldn't get the baby to latch on correctly in that position. Every 45 minutes (because my baby kept spitting up and I wasn't making that much milk) I had to get out of bed, configure a pile of pillows on the couch, and have my husband help me adjust myself and the baby into the right position. On top of that, I got nauseous and the chills every time I was exposed.

Yeah. I'm just lazy and dumb. Why didn't I just think of nursing in bed!

Sometimes I hate other women.

Last I checked 7-11 is open at 2am.  Heck so is my local grocery store.  So any mom who feels that desperate can go buy formula 24/7.   That's what I tell my friends - don't have it in your house because you can always change your mind w/ a 10 minute car trip.

Actually, formula is 6th best (2,3&4 belong to mom's pumped milk, wet-nurse, other women's milk, pasturized human milk)  

According to the AAP statistics nearly 800 infants in the United States alone die every year before their first birthday simply because they are fed formula instead of breastmilk.  

Not everyone can breastfeed.  Formula can be a lifesaver.  However, that doesn't mean free samples should be handed out by the medical profession.  What other profession gives a drug with potentially fatal consequences to every one it treat regardless of need?

Roxannex-

My co-sleeping comment was not meant to offend anyone; I appologize if you felt that way. For the first month or so, I did have to sit in the chaisse or prop myself up in bed to feed my son; he was still too small to reach my breast lying down. But as he grew, and I got more experienced, I was able to prop myself on my side and sleep while nursing.

I never called you lazy, I never called you dumb. Where on earth did you come up with that?!?!

There is no reason to hate me.

for the record, ladies, bringing a baby into the world is not all about YOU. it's not all puppy dogs and rainbows and romanticized baby product commercials. sleep deprivation, pain and discomfort, making yourself uncomfortable and even miserable for the benefit of your baby, that's all part of it. i think many of you seem to forget that all of that is temporary.

and do you honestly think that your great-grandmothers had the luxuries you do? they worked their asses off and bent over backwards for their babies. they worked through the pain, discomfort and sleep deprivation to give their babies the best they could. and yet, here some of you are, whining about how it just didn't work for you, you didn't like it, didn't want to do it, and how dare someone who put in the time and effort pass judgment on you?

come on! you brought it on yourself! what would those great-grandmothers say if they could bear witness to this "debate"?

Our great grandmothers would say- 'Pass me some formula right away so that I can be free if I choose'!

Our great grandmothers didn't have the choice and our great grandmothers didn't have the demands that modern society puts on women. Demands that technology has brought on. And, I think if a lot of our great grandmothers had the choice, they would have chosen not to go through so much pain and discomfort and sleep deprivation if there was another solution. No, having babies isn't all about US, it's about the baby and the reason I chose to formula feed was because of the baby.

Andie, I did not say "those who give up BF to get some extra Zs are doing it for the wrong reasons and they shouldn't have had children in the first place."

I said "But if you're switching to formula because you want some sleep... well, what the frick did you think having an infant around would be like?"

Please do not misparaphrase me. I did not say nor mean that people who choose formula to get some sleep should not have had their children. I meant only that it is confusing to all hell to me how people can be surprised to be sleep-deprived with babies around. Isn't it one of the biggest jokes made about new parenthood? Or parenthood in general? Once the baby stops waking at night, and the kids stop wetting the bed and have nightmares, you wake up worried where your teenager is or whether your 27-year-old is using condoms tonight. I guess I figured it was all part of the package, and it honestly confounds me when people seem surprised by it. I said it in a snarky way, and I mean it in a snarky way, but I do not think people who are treating their babies well should not have had them. People who put their babies in microwaves, sure.

actually, our great-grandmothers did have a choice...there was homemade formula, for those times when bf'ing didn't work out....there were also wet nurses, but everyone gets squicked out about that now.

and honestly, i think there were *more* demands placed on our great-grandmothers than on modern day women. technology is supposed to make our lives easier, is it not? why are you using that as an excuse for being busier?

personally, i found bottle-feeding to be way more work than bf'ing, and i'd never do it again. the initial pain and discomfort and sleep deprivation really was temporary.

i guess i just don't understand the trade-off here....why would someone prefer instant gratification in the form of substitution and spending the next year and a half going broke buying formula and constantly being tethered to bits of plastic, to a couple weeks of being miserable in order to form a bf'ing relationship that is free, rewarding, and requires no measuring, mixing, and sterilizing, no bits of plastic, and no extra stuff to pack to go out and about?

when making this choice for your baby, did you consider what they would prefer? if you're making the choice based on what suits YOUR needs and YOUR busy schedule, then you are making it about YOU.

wow....

this discorse has really become full of hatred...why?  

The people who are jumping to attacks are the ones who give this debate a bad name....be kind to each other...and if you can't say something nice...don't say anything at all(grandma advice again....)

My first two children were adopted at 4 anad 5 mos of age...no bf options...well, there are...but neither child would have adated well since they had been bottle fed from birth...and our third is a biological child, and was born preemie and unable to nurse...WITH THE BLESSING of my pedi, she is formula fed....my ped who bf all 3 of her children...has no issue with ff...she agrees bf is best...but, she knows all 3 of my kids to be healthy, smart and amazingly well bonded...and no our hospital which is on board with the WHO healthy babies initiative...did not give us formula, but at our 2 week visit our Pedi did...

Girls...love your kids...read to them...and remember there are a lot of mommies out there who have lost their babies, who would love to give them one more bottle...or one more breast feeding....why fight about it....nourish your kid the way you feel is best.

To Boob Mom's first comments... don't feel lonely.  I have successfully BF two babies... still nursing a 13 month old and my first till she was 26 months.  Exclusively.  I also agree that it is some determination.  I have worked FT and have done everything from pump in my car and rush to daycare to nurse during lunch to make it work - so it can be done.  Although some women have challenges or just choose not to BF, it is still all very personal. Am I an advocate - absolutely!  But, it's not up to me to judge someone who can't make it work.  

I do think the free samples are negative - especially to young moms who know nothing about BFing and how to establish a strong milk supply.  And they are wasted - I gave them away, whatever to get them out of my house... I didn't want the temptation... And it's a shame to waste formula when so many starving kids could use it.  

My closing is Breast is Best from a quality of milk standpoint - NO MATTER WHAT, but we have to keep in mind not everyone has the same story... I know it's HARD and DEMANDING - but OH SO REWARDING!!!!!!  And I'll keep it up until my little one naturally weans.      

You have to buy the diapers, the carseat, the stroller, and everything else. So buy the damn formula if you want to use it. Why complain when the hospital won't send you home with a big can for free? It's not their job to feed your baby once you get it home. It's your job.

And for those complaining that they don't have lactation consultants from their hospital. I choose a midwife and a freestanding birthing center. She came by two days later to check on me, and that was an hour drive for her. Then called a week later to see how breatfeeding was going. Money talks ladies. Instead of handing your money to the hospital then bitching when they won't pony up for lactation consultants, which why would they when formula marketers offer them more, then take your money elsewhere. If more women voted with their checkbooks there would be a lot more changes going on.

Sorry, peeps. Cryitout Mike's on a plane right now, headed for a well-deserved vacation with a sixteen-month-old who has some peculiar sleep habits . Have a wonderful week, Mike, all of you. So I'm filling the void here, so to speak, though I

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Breastfeeding, like countless other baby related tasks, is a skill and it has a learning curve like any other skill.  Certainly the learning curve is steeper than formula feeding, but once you've got it, it's free and there's no STUFF you have to tangle with.  Think how positive life with a small child would be if we opted for more skills rather than material skill substitutes!  Slinging rather than resorting to piles of baby containers, co-sleeping rather than a whole separate room of baby stuff, and certainly much more.  Takes time, but once learned you have those skills for the duration.

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Rabid breastfeeders make me unreasonably angry and there are too many of them in this thread.

Here are the facts: New York city public hospitals will no longer offer formula with their free gift bags of stuff, unless a mother specifically requests it. The real issue here is that this will do absolutely nothing to promote breastfeeding or discourage it. It's a token gesture, and a lot cheaper than providing follow-up lactation consultant visits, support, or even longer hospital stays that include getting mother and baby started out breastfeeding right. As a token gesture, it allows lactivists to feel like they've accomplished something while still doing nothing to address the main issues why women use formula in the first place: namely, the lack of resources to establish breastfeeding, and the lack of support to continue it.

Me? I am trying desperately to wean my daughter at a year and wading through several volumes of weaning advice, most of which seems to consist of, "let the baby decide when to wean" -- which is no help at all, thanks! I really think the "breast is best" campaign, while well-intentioned, is a complete mess in terms of actually dealing with real-life women's issues. The best answer? Honestly? If formula's so terrible, they should invent some better formula.

Also, formula's been around since the 20's... (in commercial form, and there were substitutes available earlier than that) I believe my great-grandmother actually used it for at least some of her seven children.

And frankly, with seven kids, who can blame her?

There's a great discussion of the bottle vs. breast debate in Mary McCarthy's "The Group" if you'd like your grandmother's perspective...

For a great comic series about this issue, check this out: www.thecowgoddess.com

This is such an American issue. In almost no other country in the world (that I know of) are so many babies formula fed. This is not because American mothers have less milk, aren't dedicated to the well-being of their children, or give in easily.

It's because asking a woman to dedicate herself to being attached at the hip to a new little being while having at most 6 weeks of maternity leave (unheard of in most of the world) to figure out how to make it through the night with a modicum of sleep - and no free community or health care support to help her figure things out - is ridiculous.

I'm just coming up to the end of my one year of maternity leave (in Canada) and am still breastfeeding and hoping to keep it up when I return to work. After 11 months of it though, I'm now a pro. At 6 weeks my nipples still hurt like crazy any time my son came near me, I was never thinking straight due to lack of sleep, and would have done darn near anything to get myself out of this hole had I needed to actually function for 8 hours a day at my job.

What you should really be debating is how to get the American government to REALLY support family values by giving families the support they need to make the right decisions for their kids. That support is what will keep women from using formula... not making them pay for it rather than getting it for free.

I realize not all women can breastfeed, what upsets me, is when I see a baby laying in a carseat with a bottle shoved in their mouth. If you can't nurse (or choose not to) atleast hold your child when you feed them.

I certainly hope that the author meant to say "ice pack" and not "ice pick" in the first paragraph.  

Although I disagree with much of what was written, I believe they should not take out the formula.  I am a mother of a 14 month old baby girl and yes I STILL am breastfeeding her, and quite a bit.  I did infact keep it on hand "just in case", it made me feel not so panicky should I collapse "new mothers panick--must think of every senario" and my baby was left with nothing to eat!  On the second day of bringing her home at about 3 in the morning exhausted from sleep deprivation I grabbed for the ready made bottle of formula that the hospital had sent home for me.  Yep I did it, it was there and I was desperate to get my baby satisfied so we could both get some sleep.  I put the artificial nipple in her mouth she suckled a few times, made a face, spit that crap out....and that was the end of it!  I threw the rest out and nursed my baby solely on breastmilk and it's still am 14 months and going strong!  I've never felt the "euphoria" that is mentioned, but maybe it's just my lack of knowledge on the definition.  But what I have felt is priceless and I do feel that breastfeeding mothers experience a more intense bond, how could you not?  Many times during one day and night to for that matter we are "heart-to-heart", so to speak, with our babies.  I've noticed many women who bottle feed their babies will set them down and prop a blanket or something else to hold the bottle until their baby can hold the bottle themselves--so they can go off doing other things....or nothing at all....just to be FREE of their baby.  Do I feel superior because I breastfeed, you bet!  

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It's not so much that Breast Is Best. Breast milk is the NORMAL food for babies. Formula is the fake, replacement food. If you REALLY can't breast feed you obviously should use formula, just as if you REALLY can't get a decent cup of coffee you should go ahead and get the instant from the vending machine in the styro cup. Go ahead and drink that brown-ish chemical soup, but don't act like I am a nut for not wanting to drink it...

It's like this:

Grass-Astroturf

Green trees-Fake Ficus

Clean Air-Air Conditioned Airplane Air

Good skin-Caked on makeup

Good burger grilled on charcoal vs. Cafeteria burger

Butter-margarine

Your own hair-wig

We can get so used to fakes (flowers, butter, coffee creamer) that we convince ourselves that the trade off is worth it. See, I don't have to water that 'plant'. See, that 'butter' keeps in the fridge for about six months. See, that 'creamer' is always here, never goes bad and comes in mint. So what if plant is suspiciously turquoise, the butter melts to a neon yellow puddle and the creamer has a weird tangy aftertaste?

The sturm and drang around breast v. formula feeding is much like the trouble between public spaces and