I love the exact, carved-in-stone scheduling of well-baby visits to the
pediatrician. First appointment at two weeks of age, then four weeks, two
months, and so on. No guessing; those weigh-ins and vaccinations practically
schedule themselves.
I am lost, however, when it comes to the dentist. My oldest girl sat in a
dentist’s chair for the first time at the ripe age of five. This, apparently,
was four years later than is recommended by the American Academy of Pediatric
Dentistry,
and three years later than most of her friends.
Why did I wait so long, even as that dark speck on her lower right cuspid grew
to cover much of the tooth’s surface? First, you gotta be shitting me – a
one-year-old at the dentist? Second, I know my girl and there was no way that
even at two or three she would have sat in a chair that magically
(terrifyingly?) raised and reclined at the behest of a masked stranger digging
in her mouth. Before she was five years old, she would have cried hysterically
and/or fainted. (The mature version of her only shook uncontrollably.) Third, I
had a hell of a time finding a dentist who would allow me to stay in the room
with her. Seriously. It is common policy for dental practices to keep parents
outside the exam room. I could have turned a screaming, clawing, panicked
toddler loose on those sweet-faced hygienists. But I was reluctant to initiate
a lifetime of fearing the dentist. Against the AAPD’s judgment, we waited.
We’re fine.
Now I am trying to imagine my two-year-old, who is far more game for things
like haircuts and daycare and nail clipping than her older sister ever was,
riding the magic chair while people in pastel scrubs tell her to sit still and
open wide -- and me in the waiting room flipping through People.
Am I being unreasonable to want to stay in the room? Is my daughter
unreasonable to want me there? What’s with the tough dental love, anyway? Whose
kid has had a successful trip to the dentist – with or without you in the room
-- that they’d like to share with the class?
