Strollerderby

In Yer Face Latex Leggings: It's the Mom Jeans of Tights

Posted by Kelly Mills

sexy tightsSo now that we've added to your postpartum wardrobe with the bikini jeans and the latex leggings, it's time for the backlash. The anti-leggings. The undergarment equivalent of mom jeans. Ladies, welcome to the Hourglass Toners. Also known as giant body-shaping tights. You may not be able to get away with them in your low-slung hipster pants, the ones that show just a hint of ass crack, but that's life. And supposedly these and a padded push-up bra are the non-surgical mom job, just as long as you don't mind keeping your clothes on AT ALL TIMES.

So if these make your hot bod look better, how do they qualify as mom jeans? First, they stop somewhere just under your boobs, oh-so reminiscent of that lovely maternity underwear some of us swore we'd never put on but totally did when we got scared our regular unders would travel south without our consent. Second, the celebs are jumping on these, just like Mischa did with the high-waisted pants. And third, while the article claims you don't want folks to know you have them on because they do so much for your figure, I'd guess prancing around in the bedroom in your shaper tights doesn't make you feel super sexy. Add a pee-pee panel and you are ready to go.   


+ DIGG + STUMBLE

Comments

 

Catherine Mills said:

Where can I buy these hourglass toners.  Have looked on aristoc and they are not available.

October 9, 2007 2:15 PM

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