By the time my third and fourth children were born, I was firmly in the camp of having the babies room in with me in the hospital. It seemed, at the time, to be the most natural thing to do, as close as I would ever come to the still somewhat alien energies of a home birth. After all, people have been giving birth for centuries in all sorts of circumstances, and certainly in most of them, babies have remained with mothers in those precious hours and days right after birth. And research seems to agree with that premise, though I have to tell you that having done it both ways, there are problems, as I see it, with both.
I polled the Strollerderby bloggers who kindly reminded me of aspects of each choice, rooming-in and using the convenient hospital nursery, perhaps a parent's last time ever to be alone again for twenty years.
Mike just wanted to watch the game and have some peace while those pesky nurses brought the baby in every hour, claiming she was hungry or something and clanging carts and poking and prodding. He would have escaped down a sheet ladder had he thought of it in time.
Kelly wishes she had taken advantage of the hospital nursery to get at least a few precious hours of sleep, because her child hasn't slept since.
And Rachael missed her twins terribly, having sent them on to the nursery at a nurse's recommendation. She suggests having the baby room in but sleep with daddy, which to me seems to be the best of both worlds but does require the participation of a willing partner.
While supposedly studies show that mothers DON'T actually get more sleep when the baby's in the nursery (I have issues with this premise), they do show that rooming-in is better for babies. Babies who do so generally stay warmer, cry less, have lower amounts of stress hormones, and gain more weight than babies left in the nursery.
And while I get all that, and got it enough to make it my choice, I still think that it depends on circumstance. If there's been a particularly difficult birth for instance, it's not like we typically come equipped these days with a doula or enough family to care for the baby while mom gets her strength back, in which case resting up a bit for a day or two before going home with a newborn may be the best option.
Which did you choose, and how did it work out for you? Would you choose differently next time?
