We were discussing this story here at Strollerderby (in the break room, next to the Diet Coke machine and the daily pile of Krispy Kremes), and we found that none of us here have sagging breasts! Not that we whipped them out to compare, not exactly, but what a coincidence, we all have the breasts of 15-year olds! I bet you do, too!
But in case you don't, in case your chestal area seems to exhibit the ravages of time, don't blame it on breastfeeding. Instead...
Nope. Blame it instead on smoking! What, you're not a smoker? Me neither! Then obviously, your breasts don't sag!
How do I know this? Why, a study, of course! By plastic surgeons, who gawked at drooled over studied in an extremely professional manner the appearance, shape, and elasticity of the breasts of women wanting breast lifts. They also grilled queried the women about various personal factors including their age, number of pregnancies, whether they breastfed, and whether they smoked. The conclusion? Breastfeeding wasn't a factor. Not at all.
What a relief. All that pulling, tugging, nursing in uncomfortable positions, has only led to bad posture. And I still have the breasts of a 15-year-old! I swear! (that's me in the photo, actually)
But what did seem to contribute to sagging breasts? Age, smoking, and number of pregnancies. So, uh, have kids? Looks like you can blame THEM.
