Of all the scary things that my kid could get himself into, I think smoking worries me the most. It's so insidious; even with all the crackdowns on smoking in public places and health studies, it still seems like a rather normal part of our culture, not like, say, being a crackhead or a meth head. And I'm sorry, even though I know full well that smoking is a one-way ticket to every kind of health problem, it still looks cool. Okay, maybe not on that kid over there, but in most cases.

Understandably, the US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) recommends pretty hefty minimum spending levels on state tobacco prevention programs every year, but a new report by the Campaign for Tobacco Free Kids shows that only three states---Maine, Delaware, and Colorado--spend that minimum amount. And Delaware doesn't even really count.

Only 17 states spend even half of their CDC minimum, including my state, Illinois, at a wheezy 13 percent, and you chimneys in Connecticut spent nothing. Nothing! This is your fault, Chris Dodd. The nationwide total for funding these programs will be $717.2 million. Meanwhile, the tobacco industry will spend $13.4 billion. Have fun competing against that with some lame-ass unit in health class.