Every morning when I leave the house, I put on my fedora, tuck a newspaper under my arm, grab my briefcase the kiss my sons goodbye. Every morning my 5 year old pleads with me to stay home and not to go to work, hugging my leg and asking why I can’t work from the house. Every morning I back out of the driveway and honk the horn at my sons as they plaster their faces against the living room window and wave madly until I’m out of view.
I’m a working Dad, but here’s a newsflash: I’m not the only Dad whose heart breaks every morning when he has to leave his children for those 9-10 hours stretches that feel like an eternity. Want another newsflash or how about a just headline in the scrolling news ticker at the bottom of this blog? (It’s not there? You may need to upgrade your software) Dad’s aren’t the only one’s who work fulltime jobs and miss out on time with their children. Admittedly the SAHM/WAHM is still more common than the SAHD/WAHD, but it’s not like Working Moms are fictitious cultural myths like Bigfoot, The Loch Ness monster and Decaffeinated Coffee; which is why I hate when studies like this come out framed to only include fathers.
A Government-commissioned report in Great Britain found that fathers who work long hours miss out on spending a month a year with their children. So, you mean if I spend more time at work I’ll spend less time at home? This is groundbreaking stuff. But again, my problem with studies like this is that that do not take into account 1) Working mothers who are equally affected by the hours they spend at work 2) the lost time the family gets to spend together as a FAMILY and not just Dad’s lost time with the kids. I was dreamin' when I wrote this so forgive me if it goes astray, but it’s 2008 researchers, let’s stop conducting studies like it’s 1959.
Am I jealous of SAHM? I Am. Do I envy WAHM? I envy their Freedom. Does not being a SAHD make me Sad? It does. Would I rather be a WAHD? Some people tell me I’ve been one all my life, but I’d do just about anything to make it official. The question of choice and creating a work-life balance is an individual one that each family, father and mother has to work through, but let’s all stop pretending that Dad’s are the only ones who get choked up when they look at the pictures of their children on their desk at work. OK?
And this coming from a guy with only 11 months on his calendar.
