Quick Note: Hi, I’m Cole and I’m the new guy on the blog. My handle is The Good, The Dad and The Ugly (my wife’s choice out of many far more ridiculous names). Enough about me, on to the booze and rodents.
Borderline alcoholic parents worth their salt know that Chuck E. Cheese serves beer. There is nothing that helps you get through your kid’s birthday party extravaganza like a little hair of the dog. Of course, the collision of alcohol with family friendly fun does create some awkwardness, such as the following inappropriate exchanges:
“Hey why don’t we skip the pitcher of beer and just set me up with an IV, eh Chuck? Just kidding, but seriously, keep those pitchers coming. Dad’s in some pain and he needs his medicine.”
“Hey kid, go ask that breastfeeding lady if she’s single.”
(Before playing head-to-head pop-a-shot against a seven year old) “I’m gonna take you down to Chinatown!”
(After tying with the seven year old and heading into sudden death tiebreaker mode) “Ooo, this shit just got real.”
(After beating said seven year old in sudden death) “Grow a pair.”
“No sir, I didn’t come here with a child. Is that some kinda rule?”
Also not acceptable, walking around with a string of prize tickets hanging from the zipper of your pants.
Here is bad news for all you who like to get your drink on at the House of Chuck: Chuck E. Cheese has suspended alcohol sales due to a brawl that broke out* at a Chuck E. Cheese in Michael Moore’s favorite dead-horse-to-kick, Flint, Michigan. Officials estimate the fracas included up to 80 combatants. In addition to cutting off the booze, Cheese execs are calling a moratorium on profanity and gang symbols (all apologies Crips; you as well, Bloods).
Sorry hung over moms and dads, looks like you’ll have to sneak a little Crème De Menthe into your Shamrock Shake at the McD’s Playland from now on.
Photo: www.beans-around-the-world.com
*Note: This post originally mentioned the ban affecting all Chuck E. Chese locations. The ban only applied to this location.
