Is it possible that the $113 million a year the Bush
administration spends to finance abstinence-only sex ed. might
be better spent elsewhere? It’s a shocker, I know, but a recent study in the
Journal of Adolescent Health revealed that abstinence-only sex education does
not stop teens from having sex: in fact, those who receive comprehensive
education are 50 percent less likely to become pregnant than those who go
through an abstinence-only program and are 60 percent less likely to become
pregnant than those who receive no sex ed. Coming in the wake of a study that
revealed that one in four teenage girls has a sexually transmitted infection, these findings have
refueled the sex ed. debate in Washington, with 76 Democratic lawmakers urging
the White House to stop funding abstinence-only programs.
One teenager’s online comment on ABC’s coverage of the study was
revealing—and a bit disheartening. “What really needs to happen is getting the
information out earlier,” she wrote. “We are all having sex younger then the previous generation and we like it.
Stop telling us only the bad things about sex and start telling us everything.”
While I agree completely with her call for comprehensive education about safe
sex, this got me to thinking that the real responsibility for healthy teen
sexuality lies with parents.
Sex is fun and teenagers are bound to discover this on their
own. But it has emotional consequences that few teenagers are able to
understand without the aid of caring adults they can trust. I still remember my
mother telling me when I was in high school, “Everything changes when you have
sex with someone. It’s a really emotional experience, no matter what.” I knew
she would help me access contraceptives if I needed them, which made me take her
message that sex was a big deal emotionally all the more seriously. These are the kind of messages that need to supplement
health-based comprehensive sex education classes. Boys especially need to be
taught the ethics of sexuality, since they are by far more likely to be aggressors.
“Not everything that feels good is good” is not an intuitive truism for most
adolescents.
What do you parents of teenagers think? Are there any
methods for helping your children to postpone sex and to have healthy romantic relationships? When is an appropriate time to start discussing sex with your children?
Photo: dinahproject.com
