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Parent Trap, Baby Crap

Posted by Madeline Holler

Remember the mile-long checklist of stuff your area mega-store recommended for your baby registry? Stuff your mom had never heard of, like breast pads, and stuff you had never heard of, like, um, everything else? Of course you know now, but did you even know back then there were so many baby shampoos to choose from?

This was your entry to Parenting, Inc., what one author calls the modern way parents' every fear, hope and dream are exploited to get them to buy things like a souped up baby blanket (the Miracle Blanket) and $800 Bugaboos.

Salon interviewed Pamela Paul, author of the new book "Parenting, Inc." which looks at the new ka-jillion dollar market of all things baby/kid/parent. 

Personally, I think we parents know we're being taken for a ride, but swaddling a kid isn't a natural skill all of us develop, hence, the Miracle Blanket. And just try to pry the Bugaboo out of the hands of actual city dwellers. Turns out, they're worth every penny for people who actually haul their kids longer distances than from the SUV to the mall entrance. These are conveniences for parents, not enhancements for the baby. I am very much in favor of convenience for me.

Still, I get the author's point. Other products in the crosshairs: baby signing classes, Baby Einstein videos (I think we all agree on that one), infant sleep positioners, and Time's Up/Time Out Teddy Bear (yes, that's stupid).

What totally unnecessary baby thing do you think, in hindsight, was probably a load of baby crap? For us, quite literally, it was the Diaper Genie.


Comments

 

Jairip said:

Wipe warmers.

I never bought one, I refused, but everyone around me raved about them.

Look I changed my son in a church cemetery on a rainy, fall day in London. The kid didn't utter a peep. He's a trooper. Wipe warmers are for wimps. :)

March 31, 2008 3:06 PM
 

Susan said:

the bottle warmer, pure waste of money!

March 31, 2008 4:45 PM
 

bookmama said:

I don't understand how people can lump teaching sign language to your baby in with frivolous sh*t like wipe warmers. Sure, she'll eventually learn to speak in fluent sentences, but that takes a while and until that happens, I welcome every opportunity to understand what's going on in my baby's head. Not only have we been able to respond to her needs (milk, bed, dirty diaper, lights too bright) but we've also been able to respond to and "talk" about things that interest her: music, bears, dogs, etc etc. I love it that we taught our daughter sign. She's 1 year old and knows dozens of signs, and I firmly believe that it's helped her speech as well, since she knows more than a dozen words and is literally adding more every day. Sometimes, when she says something I can't quite figure out but does it along with a sign, we both get excited when I "interpret" her correctly!

March 31, 2008 5:16 PM
 

Madeline Holler said:

The baby signing one surprised me too, Bookmama! But I think she argues that it's not a bad thing, it's just parents shouldn't feel like they're not giving their kids a good start if they skip the signing and stick to speech.

The signs are fun!

March 31, 2008 5:46 PM
 

Cassie said:

Baby signs was a waste of time.  My daughter began talking at 6 months.  If I could nto understand her she had some unusual ways of communcating.  If she wanted to eat she beat on her high chair. If she wanted a drink she beat on the fridge. I knew the sign language stuff was out when she made a sign and then said, "Right mama?"  Good grief.  Sterlisers were a waste of money and those plastic bottles that make kids autistic.  Should have stuck with the boob.

March 31, 2008 5:48 PM
 

Ella said:

I'm sorry, but the Miracle Blanket was worth every penny

March 31, 2008 6:45 PM
 

km said:

I'm having my third baby any week now, and I've pretty much banned my family from buying anything except clothes and cloth diapers.  No crib (although I did get a co-sleeper), no playpen, no wipe warmers (I mean really, eventually the kid is gonna have to get changed not at home, with *gasp* a non-heated wipe), no baby monitors (we live in an apartment--how far am I ever really going to be from this baby?), no dedicated diaper pail, no shoes (sure, they're cute, but does a newborn really need them/keep them on?), no gigantic diaper bag...the list goes on.

I obviously think most dedicated baby products are a waste of money, particularly considering the short time these products will actually be used.  Of course, it took me until my third kid to realize this, but really, stream-lined is the way to go.

March 31, 2008 7:05 PM
 

mcglory13 said:

Everytime these threads come up somebody disses something (last time it was slings for me) that other people adored and used the heck out of. Every kid is different and every family is different and I don't understand what is gained by people pronouncing what they personally think is useless. Unless I'm mistaken, nobody's holding a contest to see which kid got by with the least, or who fashioned the best diapers out of leaves and twigs and bottles out of flower blossoms.  

March 31, 2008 7:43 PM
 

Sherry said:

I agree, mcglory13.  One parent's treasure is another parent's useless piece of crap.  Personally I find these lists to be totally useless.  If I want advice about things to buy or not buy I ask people I  know and who have used them and why they liked/disliked them.  

March 31, 2008 8:34 PM
 

diera said:

My main strategy has been to buy stuff used.  I agree that for every person who thinks X is overpriced and useless, there's someone who thinks it was the greatest.  Just buy your X used, and you get the best of both worlds.  I got an Inglesina Zippy stroller at a sale this weekend for $35!

March 31, 2008 8:58 PM
 

Paloma Pigeon said:

Why is everybody always hatin' on the Wipe Warmers? Frankly, a little heat helps, ahem, clean more thoroughly sometimes.

March 31, 2008 9:34 PM
 

Pepper said:

Newborn bibs!

My newborn wasn't actually that messy, so we never ever used them, but since he was my first, I'm not sure what other peoples experiences were...

March 31, 2008 9:36 PM
 

Mom2Two said:

I agree with McGlory.  Ask ten moms their top baby item and you'll get ten different answers.

We had a diaper pail with the first (but not the Genie) and when the kid got to be mobile, he started knocking it over and rolling it around.  It went into the basement and stayed there until I gave it away.

The medical kit was useless, I could have bought just the thermometer and nail clippers for cheaper.

In general, I think people don't realize how many items are duplicated on those lists.  Do you really need an exersaucer AND a walker?  Or a Bjorn AND a backback?  Or a bouncy seat AND a bumbo?

March 31, 2008 10:32 PM
 

AllisonWonder said:

I warm wipes in my hands.

April 1, 2008 8:51 AM

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