This incredibly open and boldly honest story featured in The Guardian details one mother’s journey to the breaking point. This may be the kind of story people don’t want to hear, the kind some might even feel is repulsive, which is all the more reason people need to hear it… To have some understanding for this woman’s situation, think about your own kids. I, for example, have two regular kids: a four-year-old and a one-year-old. Though they are lovely separately, put them together and add the new addition of a puppy to our house, and it’s a screaming, destructive cyclone. If this was all I had to do I could see not wanting to jump out the window, but I work a full time job, work a whole other full time job at home freelance writing and blogging and the kids and dog are a full time job in itself. The other night Dalton, our 1-year-old, screamed and screamed until 1 am. Being robbed of the ability to hold onto one clear thought at some point in your day or even having the choice to decide when you want to go to bed is enough to make you want to jump a train and live a life on the rails. We are not supposed to complain about our children, and I am not. When I can snatch half a second of clear thought, all my frustration toward my kids melts away and I see their actions for what they are, experiment, play and emotional development. But when you don’t get that break, down that path madness lies. Now take the standard madness of parenthood and imagine that intensity multiplied by a factor of ten. Parents of autistic children often don’t even get that half second of sanity I mentioned. They barely get a chance to get their head above water. I know parents with autistic kids, and it is a full time business. Often one of the parents makes the difficult but necessary choice to stop working and stay home with the child. There can be no end to the sacrifices. A common first reaction to this mother’s story of contemplated suicide might be “what a horrible thought.” And it is a horrible thought, which is why it is so important this mother and others like her tell these stories. Being a strong and good parent isn’t hiding from the pain and desperation, it’s exploring it and most importantly sharing so those in similar situations may learn and understand.
Photo: www.just2moms.com
About Cole Gamble
Cole Gamble’s writings on the crimes of Willy Wonka, man-eating beds and tales from his cringe-worthy life appear here on Babble, the humor site Cracked, The Daily Beast, The Huffington Post and Salon. He is working on a book entitled, Conquer Everything! A Self Help Book to Destroy All Other Self Help Books and Grant You Mastery in Everything.
