If you're a modern 21st Century mother, you’ve read at least one "momoir" — books written by mothers that capture, with varying degrees of success, the nature of motherhood in these times.

But as Deesha Philyaw points out in the brilliantly titled "Ain't I A Mommy" article from Bitch (via Alternet), few, if any, such books have been written by black women. Why, she wonders, aren't black women's experiences of parenting considered something that would sell to the mainstream book buyer? After all, Anne Lamott's Operating Instructions started the trend (and in my option remains the best of the genre), and there aren’t a huge number of dreadlocked, single, Christian, liberal, recovering alcoholic moms out there who'd buy the book out of affinity. Good writing sold the book and that's hardly limited to whitefolks.

Philyaw makes several interesting points, one of which is that black women tend to just stay out of the "mommy wars" because of a broader understanding of the myriad reasons women go to work or choose to stay home.

This is my favorite quote from the whole lengthy piece, and a very astute summing up of the reason I roll my eyes when people go on about the "mommy wars":

"Low-income and working-class women, black women, and other women of color don't see their mothering experiences and concerns reflected in the mommy media machine, and we get the cultural message loud and clear: Affluent white women are the only mothers who really matter. Further, media overexposure of these women bolsters the perception of them as self-absorbed brewers of tempests in teapots."

Damn straight. The rest of the article is just this good. Read it, and think.