Strollerderby

I will not allow my son to do that - every child needs to learn that it is not acceptable to do that, not just girls. Bull s*&^.

Of course it's not acceptable! This is probably just bad parenting, and I think you shouldn't necessarily pinpoint boys doing this, unfortunately I've seen many children displaying this behavior, and I honestly don't think it was a gender issue...

I'll never raise my son to think he can away away with doing stuff like that, so for me, fiction!

And I think the word "theft" might be just a tad too strong in this case. If you don't encourage the "boys will be boys" attitude, don't go all "daddy's little princess got mugged" either... :-)

i wouldn't have allowed my son to behave that way at age two.  i made myself crazy trying to teach him appropriate behavior.

I simply think you would have had the same kind of response from the parents even if those children had been girls... Not "boys will be boys" but "what are you going to do, kids are just kids..." or "it's just some harmless playing" or "yeah, they tend to do that at this age"...

I know you were surprised that it happened twice in a row and it's understandable, but I think it's still a very small statistical sample to make it a whole "boys will be boys" issue...

I may be missing the whole point, I don't know...

I don't think this is a gender issue whatsoever!

The shrugging of the shoulders and the "boys will be boys" excuse can be translated to: I just don't feel like dealing with it, so there.

It's lazy parenting, boys OR girls, period.

Oh.. c'mon.. you call it THEFT?  HAHA... it's more like being a 2 year old.  Glad your 2 year old has stopped snatching things from other kids.  Mine hasn't stopped yet.  It's not that I haven't tried to stop it from happening, but it still does (of course I intervene when it happens!).  Oh, and he's a boy.  How about 2 year olds will be 2 year olds?  Except, obviously, your very advanced daughter and some other advanced 2 year olds who are children of some of the people commenting on here!

Tiffer, the problem isn't that a two-year-old is snatching things, it's that the parents see no reason to correct that behavior. Toddlers learn through repetition, so in order for them to learn that it's wrong to take other people's things (which in the long run very much translates to theft) the parent has to say, each and every time, that that was a bad decision and give the item back to its owner. If you're intervening each time, than you're not being criticized, so why take it personally?

Also, as the mother of a 20 month old I have no patience with "boys will be boys."

Anne, I actually understood that the criticism was about parents who don't ever intervene.  I just thought it was funny/ridiculous to call it "theft" and to start the story out by talking about the fact that his kid doesn't snatch toys!  I was actually nitpicking because the tone of the blog was just a little holier than thou.  

I get that parents who shrug off behaviors are annoying (particularly when they just scapegoat the gender of the child), but like a previous commenter had already said, the whole idea that the "little princess got mugged" on the playground was just a little over the top.  That's all.  I didn't really take it personally.

 "Boys will be boys" are four words that are not tolerated in my presence!  I actually do think it's a gender thing because boys are taught by some people that it's ok to take things that don't belong to them and girls are taught that it's ok that boys take things from them, because, hey, they're just being themselves.  My son is going to be taught from day one that you don't just take something from someone.  You can always ask nicely and if they say no, then get over it.  

My mom said (and taught) that you're never too young to learn to knee a guy in the nuts...which, in the long run, did me way more good than it did her.

A 2 year old girl sending an obnoxious 2 year old boy to the ground with a knee to the groin?  Adorable.

The action itself may not be gender-determined: some kids are more aggressive/less sharing.

However, the excuse "boys will be boys" IS very gendered.  If it was "kids will be kids" or just "ehh, whatever" - then I'd agree with people who are shooting down the questions.  But what the people actually said, which presumably indicates at least part of what they are thinking, is that in this instance, there is no problem, because of the gender of their child.

Even if it's just "what people say" - I don't think that's a great excuse.  Plenty of people use racial slurs, insults to people of different sexual orientations, negative words regarding people with disabilities.  I'm not a parrot - I don't use those words.  So I can also think about the excuses I give.  

I don't think it's a problem to give an excuse.  The problem is that the excuse is - it's OK for boys to do something, solely by virtue of their gender.  

I agree with the OP - I think that the excuse "girls will be girls" wouldn't have been used here.  And I think it does point to some views about what children of each gender are supposed to be like.