Cracked has gone from being a Mad magazine clone I used to read as a kid to one of the funniest web sites around.
Luckily, somebody on their staff must have children, or at least an unnatural fascination with child-related things. Here is the first of three lists they recently published, all of which deal with kid stuff.
First up: Gruesome Origins of Fairy Tales.
5. Little Red Riding Hood: Inter-Species Sex Play, Cannibalism
We all know the basics – little girl going to Grandma's house gets captured by wolf that is pretending to be Grandma, Woodsman shows up to save the day. According to Cracked, "the woodsman was a later addition to the tale. In the early versions of the story, Red and her Grandmother are dead. The. Goddamn. End." In addition, "Much earlier versions also liked to spice up the sexuality angle of the story, by having Red outwit the wolf by performing a striptease for him while he's lying in bed dressed as her Grandmother, and then running away while he's 'distracted'." Um, ew.
4. Snow White: Prince Pedophile, More Cannibalism
According to Cracked, Disney added the part where the wicked step-mom dies. But in the original Grimm version, "the step-mother is tortured by being forced to wear red-hot iron shoes, and made to dance until she falls down dead." So there.
For three more, click here.
Image/source: Cracked.com
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