Cookie magazine has the same trappings of a women's fashion magazine with a few notable differences: the beautiful models/actresses on its front cover don't pout (they smile and hold babies), the tips are about efficient parenting instead of efficient orgasming, sex stories are for marrieds not singles, and the under $20 lists are for kiddie birthday presents instead of make-up.
What you still get from this woman's glossy (aimed at mothers) is a punctured self-esteem, a sinking suspicion the rest of the world (and their kids) are happier than you (and your kids), and that you're the one frump in the world who thinks of clothes in terms of practicality.
Starting with September, the first issue of our re-upped subscription and the Back-to-School one to boot, we're going to nibble at some empty Cookie calories in our monthly feature "As the Cookie Crumbles."
Grab a glass of milk, we'll dig right in:
This month, we like the throwback birthday party games. And some of the lunch packing ideas too. (Sidenote: no matter how easy the pasta omelet may be, eggs smell, uh, suspicious when unpacked from a sealed lunch box. Just don't.) Also, we'll take book recommendations anywhere, anytime and Cookie has many.
But the clothes. Yes, those clothes! So beautiful! So impish! So, so, so impractical!
The timeless classics featured in the mag's first-day-of-Kindergarten piece, "They Might Be Giants," are endearing and cute for sure. But more honest to label them "back-to-the-portrait-studio," or "back-to-Maddox's-exclusive-birthday-party" than something they might actually wear around paint, clay and unsupervised scissor use. The fabrics and prices and styles would make you dress your kid and keep her at home, lest one Little Marc Jacobs outfitted beauty snag her $150 bramble-tweed top on a sticks-and-wire model of The Giving Tree.
And, yes, we're all about gender-bending and spectrums and just letting boys be boys (or boys be girls ... whatever feels right!) ... but we're confused by the Happy Man blouse ($77) on the androgenous kid model (p. 150, pictured at left). S/he's cute, don't get me wrong. And the red tights are OK, but uncomfortable. Still, question: this isn't a boy's outfit, is it? Because unless Henry is getting homeschooled, he's going to get his feelings hurt -- not to mention mud all over his brilliant red leather booties ($250). Now whose self-esteem has been punctured?
You know, if you've ever seen a school's lost-and-found box (crate? room?), you know whenever you kiss your babe good-bye, you're also saying a possible farewell to jackets, vests, overshirts and, yes, $245 Burberry cardigans. But that's the practical frump talking.
Photos: Cookiemag.com
