OK everyone. News flash. Pay attention. Are you ready? Here we go:
Men are weird.
Not all men, of course. But I just don't see a woman doing something like this:
Ten misdemeanor counts have been filed against a man Cherry County authorities believe is the vandal some townspeople have dubbed the "Butt Bandit."
...
Larvie is suspected of leaving greasy, graphic imprints of his naked behind, and sometimes his groin, on the windows of stores, churches and schools in Valentine since the spring of 2007.
The marks were made with lotion or petroleum jelly.
Before you say, "oh, that must have been a high school kid, or some frat boy moron doing a pledge prank" allow me to inform you that the accused, Tom Larvie, is 35 years old.
He's 35 and put "greasy, graphic imprints of his naked behind" on windows. And "sometimes his groin." You know, if the mood struck him. And he's been doing this since 2007. Allegedly, of course.
"Mommas, don't let your babies grow up to be weirdos..." C'mon! Sing it with me now!
Source: Newsday/AP
Image: hecklerspray
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