Celeb 4 A
Day
For somewhere between $250 and $1,500 this company will give
your child the celeb treatment, including screaming fans, paparazzi, limousines
and bodyguards. If you ever fretted your child would never have the opportunity
to get mentally warped like a child star, here’s a great way to make up for it.
Houdini Action Figure
Have fun explaining to your kid
who Houdini is. “Whaddya mean ya don’t know Houdini? Why he was the real McCaw,
sonny boy. Twenty-Three Skidoo!”
Pet Rock
No, you can’t buy the Pet Rock in
stores anymore, but you can always grab a rock out of your backyard, toss it in
a shoe box and call it a day. I bring up the Pet Rock now because the story
behind it is an interesting one. Ad Exex Gary Dahl thought up the idea of
tossing rocks into a box and calling it a pet back in 1975. The Pet Rock became
a short-lived fad, only selling for six months, but in that six months Dahl
sold 5 million of the rocks for $3.95 each. Because of the low cost of the
product (they are rocks); Gary
pocketed 3 bucks on each sale, which netted him $15,000,000 in only six months.
That equates to $56,166,419.02 today. The moral of the story: I hate Gary Dahl.
Trailer Trash Doll
Please don’t give this to your
child. Please don’t.
M134 7.62mm Minigun
I thought I’d end the list with
something obscenely dangerous. What you are looking at, ladies and gentlemen,
is a BB gun. Yes, the gun that shot Ralphie’s eyes out. This particular air gun
is exactly modeled after a real military gun. Instead of bullets, this baby
shoots 6mm BBs from a 3,000 round magnum. You could literally fight a small
nation with one of these, or take on a horde of murderous, but honorable aliens
(Predator reference, sorry). Why this would be considered a toy for anyone any
age is a mystery.
Having said that…OH MY GOD THAT
LOOKS SO AWESOME!
Go Back to Part 1
More by this author:
The Worst Baby Products Ever (Part I)
10 Things You May Not Know About Pregnancy (and might shock
you)
The 26 Most Disturbing
Kids Movies Ever
