Strollerderby

I hate to sound cruel, as I have nothing but pity for that poor family.

However, if the father is a tennis instructor and the mother doesn't work and their insurance is already shaky, why proceed to have so many children that they have to sell everything they own?

I know that there is a double wammy of children having illnesses, but seriously. If you tag fiscal responsibility on this post, it should be the obvious lack this family has of it.

I hope their fundraising comes through.

So there are state programs that would basically pay for their daycare, at specialized locations, to deal with the illnesses/disorders the children have... yes, mom is sick, but not so sick that she can get disability... so perhaps she should put her kids into the state-sponsored daycare program (which will probably be of minimal cost) and get herself a job? A tennis coach for a dad? ARE YOU KIDDING? Hello.... Find a real job. Yes, times are tough, and yes the gesture of selling off possession is noble, but where is society going to draw the line? She has to able-bodies legs, and a brain (to think of such an ingenious idea!), why isn't she even working from home?! I am sure she could do that at night, while Dad tends to the kids.

Let's not make excuses for this family. Yes, it is a sad situation, but hello, Mom doesn't work. and she could. Because Dad can't coach tennis 24 hours a day! Geez.

"Tennis coach" sounds like a luxury job, like the year I spent working as a knitting class teacher.  Great fun and very personally satisfying, but no insurance/benefits/almost no income.  It's not something I'd even consider doing as the parent of a disabled child.

Seriously, wouldn't it be easier to get a part-time job at a place like Toys R Us or Starbucks, which offer benefits to p/t employees, rather than selling everything they own?  (I know, my husband gets crappy benefits from his "real" job, and I get none from my p/t job, but he works 8 hours a week at TRU just for the benefits.)

What are they going to do without their washer and dryer and their car?  Are they going to drag the sick children to the laundromat, or pay for a taxi to take them there?

I think the whole thing is a ploy--they were banking on the fact that such a desperate action would draw attention to their sad, sad story and the public would be so heartbroken at their tale of woe, people would just be throwing money at them.

Um, guys - back before the economic downturn and the disabled kids, neither of which is no fault of these people, apparently he was doing quite nicely as a tennis instructor. Nicely enough to have one kid, then two kids, then three kids. Then the kids got sick, no fault of their own. Then the economy turned bad.

It's easy to blame people for their misfortune, but, oddly, it's equally easy and costs nothing to be sympathetic and humane to people who have had lousy luck. I think it might be better for all of our karma to attempt the latter. And if you have an extra $5, you might want to throw it their way. Even if you want to look down your nose at Mom and Dad, those kids are even less culpable and in an even sadder situation.

Seriously, what's wrong with you people????

Thank you Bunny!  Judge not lest ye be judged!  You guys are passing judgment on these people based on a blurb on a blog?!?!  Walk a mile in their shoes before you spew such contempt from your mouths.

Bunny and Kathleen: I am a single parent, my daughter has severe asthma, I can't afford my Electric Bill. She needs her nebulizer treatments two or three times daily now... Times are tough... Yes, I work, but times are tough. Let me just tell you two first, I'm going to auction my possession off on E-bay, to afford my electric bill. Would you please contribute to my cause?!?!  Please.

We live in a society where no one seems to believe in culpability anymore these days. I mean for the parents, not the children.

I pity them, I'm not damning them or saying they deserve their plight, which obviously sucks. However, there is something very very fishy here.

Oh, and please save the high handed moral lessons for people who want them. :)

So when Dad was making a cushy living chasing balls around, all their money went to "nice things".  Whether your kids are sick or healthy, heck, whether or not you HAVE kids, it's common sense that you should build up your savings before buying a bunch of expensive crap.  Not to mention, if you have kids, you should have insurance.  Period.  I know a lot of people who work jobs they aren't thrilled with, to keep the benefits for their families.  It sounds like these parents never really wanted to sacrifice anything for their children, until it reached the point that their creditors are forcing them to do so.  

But hey, what do I know?  I'm just a parent who's done without "things" in order to have security should something awful and unexpected happen.  

Bravo! I couldn't agree more!

and

Sara:  I like your thinking on that last line!

Sara: Clearly, you view children as a commodity that one "gets" after he or she has demonstrated an appropriate amount of fiscal responsibility (per your first post). Disgusting. Yet so typical of our culture's mindset.

Laura:

So you don't think that parents (or any adults, really), should be held accountable for NOT being fiscally responsible?  Whether before you have children, or after, blowing everything you earn is stupid.  Begging and emotionally manipulating strangers is worse.  What happens after the stuff is sold, the medical bills are paid, and there's nothing left over and nothing to sell?  These people have no concept of planning.  THAT is also, sadly, typical of our culture's mindset.  

JustMe: I didn't say that people shouldn't be held responsible for decisions. But re: this couple: Do you KNOW that they spent everything they earned? I didn't read that in the linked article. The economic downturn has hit many people from all social classes, and I don't think that it's right to judge a couple because they can't pay $20,000 worth of medical bills. My family lives quite conservatively, but we sure don't have $20,000 laying around for medical bills. (If you do, well, I guess you're a better (or richer) person than the rest of us financially irresponsible idiots.) My point was that this is so typical of our culture's mindset that sees kids as a commodity or liability, depending on the economic climate, not as gifts. Not rolling in the dough? Better not have kids! Did you happen to catch Nancy Pelosi's interview a few days ago in which she defended increased funding for contraception just because money is tighter? Ick.

Laura:

No, I don't have 20k just lying around.  But I also wouldn't be buying mahogany furniture if my kids didn't have health coverage.  So yes, I consider them financially irresponsible idiots.  I'm not saying people who aren't wealthy shouldn't have children, but I also have no sympathy for people who have kids and can't be bothered to put their needs first at the expense of their own toys.  Again - what's going to happen when the handouts stop?  Will dad have to get a real job?  Will mom have to learn to cook so that they aren't spending $800/month on food JUST for the toddler?

Kids are a gift, no question.  So why didn't these people bother to treat them as such before they hit bottom?

Tracy: if I felt you really needed the money and were doing your best and I had a penny to spare, sure, I'd give it to you. And I'd sympathize with your crappy situation. Unlike the self-righteous crowd here.

Again - what does sympathy cost you? Nothing. And it's a lot nicer to hand around than judgment. Better for the whole world (and hey, better example for your kids, too - don't you want them to grow up to be generous?).

It's not being unreasonable to say that when you have children, especially children with special needs, that a responsible adult needs to get a real job rather than play tennis.  If "tennis coach" pays the bills, great!  But if not, it's time to put aside the fun and get to work.  

And why is it that whenever we get a poster here gracing us with a high-handed moral lecture (exactly, Sara) they include lines like "what's wrong with you people??????"  Sounds awfully... what's that word?  Oh yeah! JUDGMENTAL to me.

These parents are an example that we need more of today. Thank you Greg and Brittiny for loving your children more than yourselves and the things that you've bought and even earned.

OK, I'll try not to be too "high handed" this time.  How about treating people how you would like to be treated?  If you are in a tough spot, whether by your own making or by happenstance, do you expect to be ridiculed by strangers?  Do you expect people to dehumanize you?  Reduce you to choices?    

What you've stated here says more about YOU then it ever could about them.  Your opinions here don't reflect poorly on that family but on yourselves.  

Hey Tracy.....you post a way for me to get the $ to you and you got it.  I have been fortunate to receive help from many different sources in my life and am more than willing to pay if forward now.  

A slight digression: I'm getting a little tired of reading how worried Americans are that President Obama is going to create universal healthcare in the US, and then reading hundreds of news items about American people having to stay in soul-destroying jobs and loveless marriages because it's their only access to healthcare.

The other 40% - those Americans who don't have ANY health insurance - are left selling their homes and their possessions to ensure their children can receive treatment!? At least provide universal healthcare for your babies, people! Seriously, am I the only one who thinks this is screwed up?

In fact, it seems to many of us in the rest of the developed world that if you applied the same logic to healthcare that you do to education, (i.e. public is universal, private is for those who can want and can afford it) we'd all be able to stop reading such heart-breaking stories about children living in cars while receiving cancer treatment, families selling their worldly goods to generate some cash to help their disabled children, etc.

We think of it as being civilized.

There's no doubt that anyone who lives in a country with universal healthcare will admit that their system has its fair share of problems. The thing is, though, that the US 'system' (or lack thereof) doesn't offer any solutions.

I was reading all of these responses. And it made me think, didnt it say that they do have medicare? and didnt their kids only recently become sick? or so sick that they had to sell all of their stuff.

Isn't there a chance then that they had a savings, and the bills were all up to date, and they were not just spending all of the money they had on expensive items, and ignoring the fact that the kids were sick. Isnt there a chance that everything was going fine, they had a good size savings set up (possibly one for each of their kids, and a regular savings). And then the kids started to get sick, and the economy went bad, and his salary wasnt enough anymore?

I am just "spit balling" here, I dont know all of the facts. but neither do any of you.

these people are not asking for your money. they are selling items instead of asking for a hand out. the least you could do is be sympathetic.

Kathleen i completly agree with you, especially the golden rule.

Treat others as you would want to be treated... i think more people should reflect on that before making comments about others.

I just went to the website that was set up for them and read their story. and at the very bottom on the first page, it says that they are not asking for any money, they only want to sell the "things" they dont need. And they are going to use this money to help pay for their sons special diet and therapies, and to help keep their daughters life stable. it also says that they are going to use AT LEAST 10% of the money (that they get from selling their belongings) to charities such as Autisim Speaks, and the Stills Disease foundation, as well as any other charity the winning bidder would like.

this is a family in need, who are not asking for handouts. AND are still trying to give when they dont have to, and dont really have the means to. how can anyone say anything bad about them? regardless of how they got into the situation, they are digging themselves out on there own, and still trying to help others in the process.

I still think that what they are doing is a bandaid on a mangled limb.  Again - how is it they could afford over 300 DVD's, but not health insurance for their children?  Yes, it's a sad state of affairs that health insurance is expensive, but it sounds like they could've afforded it easily.  But they'd rather have a huge TV.  And again - they sell this stuff, pay the CURRENT bills, then what?  Are the children going to be miraculously healed?  

It sounds like they need an appointment with a financial planner more than anything.  

i know what  the family is going through we bought a house and later found out it was a meth house we lost everything we owned because of cross contamenation.we sued we won but took four years.we wont ever recover what we lost like our childrens pictures and things my family have left me and are no longer living. we had to start all over again and still we do not fell whole and for you people out their that think we got a big settlement we did not so dont go their.94.000 is what we got that is nothing when you loose everything you have had over the last 33 years

I cant believe that some people would be so heartless and bash a man and womans lifestyle that they have led for several years."A tennis instructor"what business is it of anyones how this Man employs himself.And the wife a stay at home Mom thats their business.The funny thing is this family never asked for a handout.The other funny thing is we as American people can set back and not say anything about our Government giving Wall Street Billions of dollars to bail them out of a self created mess and then the CEO'S get millions of dollars in bonuses yet we can find the audacity to bash these people like millions of others have been hurt by our economy.Lighten up people this is why America has become what it has A Nation filled with GREED and SELFISHNESS.This family needs help and I am going to do what I can to help them and pray for the ones bashing them that they never have a run of bad luck "KARMA" People.

Maybe dad can find another job, maybe not.  

I have two kids on the spectrum and know I wouldn't want to put either of them in government daycare.  How can you insure their safety and well-being???  Really???  So she can make enough money to pay her daycare bill (I don't think these programs are completely free).  And that would probably put them just over the amount of money made so their kids would qualify for medicaid, which isn't the best out there but at least they have something.

I agree they could both try and do something else, but how do we know they haven't went down that road???

And with everyone's investments going down the tank, how do you know theirs didn't go with it???

It is easy to be sitting here in judgement when you don't know all the facts.  

In my opinion, they are doing the best that they can with what God has given them.  I wish them all the best.

It is pretty simple. These people don't even have simple financial management skills, and they are looking to blame everyone but themselves. Don't blame the economy. You should learn more skills than teaching tennis if you want to provide for your large family. Don't blame an illness. You should have a insurance for your children. Especially if you've KNOW that one of the parents "can't" work because of her medical condition.

And their child w/ the $800 a month diet is the victim of a SCAM diet, if that tells you anything about these folks.

They put their private information all over the internet, which is consenting to be judged by strangers like myself, so don't even try using that line. Don't sell all of your stuff, figure out some long-term solution . Don't mooch off of the rest of society because you are a failure.

Well then JNL, I'm gonna take a page from your judge-y little book and say that your an insensitive jerk who obviously knows nothing of compassion or the complex nature of the human experience.  

Wow, that does feel better!  Geez, why the hell have I been taking the high road.  Why even try to be understanding.  Wow, I've seen the light.......

I am sickened by most of the comments posted and probably will be attacked as a result of posting my first ever internet comment.  However, it should be noted the Peters family didn't ask for donations.  They took responsibility for their situation by placing everything for sale.  How many parents do you know who have done that?  I'm willing to bet none.

The media picked up on their plight, and that's what has led to the donations.   May God bless the donors. I'm going to help the Peters family.  You all do what you wish, including taking more time to criticize them on the internet if that's your desire.  I'm sure you naysayers are such perfect and responsible people that you could never possibly be in their situation.  OR could your job and insurance be taken away next week and/or your family experience a medical catastrophy???  No, no, that couldn't possibly happen to you.  You're too good for that.  Now hurry up and type your derogatory comments lest you may find time to say or do something good for someone in need.

Ronnie: I find you offensive in the utmost way. First of all, if I truly needed to do so, I'd sell off my possessions in order to provide for my daughter. While I commented earlier, being snide, and I was surprised too see the two who said they'd consider my financial plight if need be, I think that your classification of most of us is far from fair or accurate. I'd sell every possession I own, just to make sure I could provide for my daughter, but I'd sit back and rationally look at my lifestyle first, to see what changes I could make to do better. I'd certainly not be a tennis coach. I think it comes down to yes, while their children are not well, I don't think everyone else should have to offer help. Yes, pay it forward is a nice thought, but mom can work opposite shifts from dad, and dad can find something more sufficient than tennis coaching, and yes, that might mean that mom and dad won't spend alot of time together as one, but guess what, I bet three quarters of the people in the U.S. in two parent homes have to juggle their schedules and sacrifice their own happiness for that of their child. I mean, really.

Either way, I'm sure in the end, some good hearts are going to step in and save this family... and maybe that's a good thing, but were we really all brought onto this earth to help each other?

I don't think so.

This is my thought to those who posted negative comment on the situation.When some one have kid(s) and they are put in a sitiuation we'er they have to choose betwen meterial things or their child whom you could never replace. What would you choose? It's clear that you would choose your child. You can't sit around and wait on a pay check, you gotta do what you have to do. Maybe the situation have to be taken care of at that very moment. this is to the person who stated "how can they afford over 300 dvds." Once they tried to buy insurance they were unable to get insurance the situation was out of hands.

"I think it comes down to yes, while their children are not well, I don't think everyone else should have to offer help."

"...but were we really all brought onto this earth to help each other?

I don't think so."

Trace if this is really how you feel, I am genuinly sorry for you. First of all, people are not being forced, they do not HAVE to offer help. They chose to. I even saw a post on ebay where a man who was blind and deaf offered up money that was donated to him, to help this family. He wasn't forced to offer it to them, he did that out of the kindness of his heart (they refused his money btw, told him that they would rather share their donations with him).

Second, and last, I don't know why we were put here, you don't, no one does. But is it really far fetched to assume that we were put here to help one another? I saw the people that offered to help you, and I find it sad that even after that you wouldn't have even the slightest amount of compassion for other human beings.

I am agnostic, I don't know if I believe in God or not. But just incase, I will pray for you tonight... I think you might need it.

Seconding the above comment. Whether we were "put here to help each other" or not, questioning whether helping people less fortunate than you is a good thing is just amazing.

The human race would rapidly perish if everyone thought that way.

elohveeee12: Thank you I'm going to need your prayers. Really. pray for me to win the lottery. please. And as I mentioned in an earlier comment, I'd be very grateful if someone offered to help me. But I certainly wouldn't put my story out there, for people to jump on the save our family bandwagon. Truth is, I've helped out numerous people at numerous times, and I've never asked for anything in return. I've never asked for someone to reciprocate my gift to them, I've only asked people to appreciate that I did something for them. If you know me, you'd honestly know that I am a kind, giving person. But alas, I welcome your prayers.

i feel it is a scam.  To much of a feel bad for me story.  They are receiving money donations and the person who bought there stuff............questionable.  You will all find out that this is a scam just people wanting money.  Kids look pretty healthy.  And why would u give the kids beds away..........where are they gonna sleep since they are so sick.  And the washing machine.........right. And they are giving up a car that works.  Wake up people SCAM.

Instead of selling the car, why don't they sell that big house and get a smaller one?!? Tell me..why don't the mother get a job in the evening??? Alot of working families do that now-a-days to make ends meet or perhaps the father should get a second job.  I work from home as a childcare provider and work a part-time job as a Paramedical Exmaniner in the evenings and weekends.  My husband works very hard and long hours so I chose to get the second job since I am home all day with kids and felt the need to get out now and then.  Before I took on the second job I was able to take online courses through the community college. I was able to do all my classes online except for the clinicals.  It's only a thought instead of selling everything you own which to me is pretty stupid.  What the hell are they going to do without a car and toys for the kid???  Sit around twiddling their thumbs stairing at each other?

Bravo Matty, Bravo! Couldn't agree more!!!!

To,

  The people that keep complaining about their sorry lives and comparing them to this poor family in need.

shut the hell up and stop being so damn jealous coz u didnt think of it first

Trace, you said "were we really all brought onto this earth to help each other?

I don't think so."

In all honesty I believe that yes, that is exactly why we are all brought onto this earth; to learn from each other and to care for each other. Why else would we be here? To ignore and insult each other?

I couldn't even read any more posts - it's obvious that most of the people commenting (and you will be able to differentiate yourself when you read further) are uneducated, soapbox riding morons who can't take the time to look at a story as a whole.  

For those of you commenting about the job of the father and lack of insurance, it CLEARLY says that they had insurance they paid for, but hard to get because of the mother's clotting disorder.  They got MediCaid to cover it.  Secondly, who said that they couldn't afford their children before they had them?  They were comfortable and then their world turned upside down when their children were diagnosed with illnesses.

And for those who said "get a better job" or "get a part time job" - did you skip the part about 2 VERY ILL children who need care?  Sometimes the father has to help, as well, and the mother has to travel to take the children to specialists...It irritates me that nobody takes the time to think before they speak.

Health insurance, privately, is very expensive for a HEALTHY SINGLE ADULT.  (Avg cost is @ $130/mo for a 25 yr old).  Do YOU know what insurance for a family of 5 - 2 with diseases - would cost?  And there are limits to what they will pay, and some specialists aren't covered.

So they are SELLING their belongings to cover their expenses.  (Who said they DIDN'T have savings, and have already spent that on bills?) Don't make assumptions based on what you DON'T see in writing...

I feel for the family as a whole but I guarantee they did not plan ahead financially before raising a family.