Strollerderby

Congress: End Amber Alerts by 2010, MicroChip Newborns

Posted by JeanneSager

After news that an Amber Alert was cancelled last week when a missing child miraculously walked in her front door, is it any surprise that Congress is taking seriously the toll that helicopter parents are putting on law enforcement with their overreactions?

Congress has put out the call for all newborns born in American hospitals to be microchipped, beginning July 1, 2010. The simple process can be done in the hospital nursery by pediatricians, who will then log the newborn's vital statistics into a national database linked to the FBI for all law enforcement to access. When an officer encounters a child, he will be able to use a scanner to immediately determine if this is the missing child in question. 

Funds to outfit the hospitals with the proper equipment, similar to those used in most veterinary offices, and to provide police with scanners will come from President Obama's latest stimulus bill. 

Children born before that date are grandfathered - so to speak - but parents will have the option of taking their children to their local hospitals to have the chips implanted just under the skin in a quick outpatient procedure. The chips will be placed near the shoulder for easy access by the scanners, but because of their very small size, there should be no lasting scars on a child's skin. 

Will you be taking Junior in?

Image: Zazzle

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Comments

 

Twin Mommy said:

I hate april fools day.  HATE it.  Is this going to be going on all day?  Not amusing.  Just irritating.

April 1, 2009 11:32 AM
 

ElMarie said:

HA!  Good one. :)  Happy April Fool's Day to you too, Babble.

April 1, 2009 11:33 AM
 

Mila said:

AH! you TOTALLY GOT ME!

April 1, 2009 11:51 AM
 

Em said:

Not to be a party pooper, but I'm with Twin Mommy. The first joke story was cute. The second one, fine. But is this all Strollerderby is going to be today?

April 1, 2009 12:03 PM
 

Knitty said:

I just want to see Brett's joke before the festivities end.

April 1, 2009 12:11 PM
 

smartfather said:

OH MAN! You totally got me on this one. Kudos.

April 1, 2009 12:36 PM
 

leahsmom said:

I'm with Knitty!

April 1, 2009 12:43 PM
 

annoyed said:

i agree... annoying, not funny. i think i'll just be staying off the site today.

April 1, 2009 12:49 PM
 

janey said:

got me.!!

come on kids. if you don't like it, by all means, stay off the site. but announcing it is just pissy.

April 1, 2009 1:11 PM
 

KellyK said:

I do too Kitty!  Where is Brett!?

April 1, 2009 2:58 PM
 

uGotme said:

Wow - never thought I'd be caught in an April fools again at age 32. You Got Me.

However, the reality of this story isn't that far out. First it was in our cats and dogs, next came GPS; combine both and you have the "perfect solution" to most "orchestrated" problems facing society today or so the great deceiver would have the world believe.

I HIGHLY encourage you all to read En Route To Global Occupation by Gary kah -- can get it at garykah.com

When you read it note the copyright date and all that has happened since then in relation to what the author says is likely to occur. Your eyes will be opened wide. Whether that's a good thing or not will depend on to whom you pledge your ultimate Faith and Trust.

April 1, 2009 5:26 PM

About JeanneSager

Jeanne Sager is a writer who lives in upstate New York with her husband, daughter, a dog and too many cats. She refuses to believe motherhood comes with pumpkin appliqued sweaters, and she';s not ready to apologize for having only one child. She writes about raising her kid in her own hometown and the mom stuff she's not embarrassed to own at her blog, Inside Out (http://jeannesager.blogspot.com), she's contributing editor of Grand Magazine, and she's a regular essayist here on Babble

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