According to this New York Times article, hugging is very popular among high school students. A video on the site mentions Hug High School, and calls teenage hugging a "sociological phenomenon." (Hey, whatever floats your sociological boat.)
But at some schools, the big bad grown-ups decided that enough is enough. The Times tells us that "schools from Hillsdale, N.J., to Bend, Ore., wary in a litigious era
about sexual harassment or improper touching — or citing hallway
clogging and late arrivals to class — have banned hugging or imposed a
three-second rule."
First of all, a quick personal note. I'm not that young and when I was in high school boys and girls kissed each other hello. Boys tended to slap hands, either as a high-five or as a slap-into-handshake. I don't remember boys hugging, but boys and girls did, and girls hugged other girls. So I'm not so sure that this "phenomenon" is terribly significant.
Now, back to the issue at hand. If the kids are hanging all over each other in the halls, that could be problematic I suppose. But the problem isn't the hugging, it's that they're standing in the halls. The three-second rule is nuts and won't work. At summer camp, I remember a "6 inches rule" (which now that I type it, sounds vaguely pornographic). Boys and girls had to be that distance from each other at all times. The rule was even enforced by some (though not all) couselors and especially the camp owners, who felt very strongly that the sexes should remain at opposite sides of the room at all times. Because as we all know, closeness leads to touching, and touching leads to... well, you know. More touching.
My children aren't old enough yet but I don't think I would be in favor of a "no hugs" rule. What would be better is teaching kids about boundaries and personal space. Maybe someone doesn't want to be hugged. Maybe it makes them uncomfortable. Maybe you need to stop hugging and get to math class already. I don't know what the answer is, but I do know that if you tell a teenager not to do something, especially something that seems to be very much a part of their daily lives, all you're going to do is make them want to do it more.
What do you think? Is banning hugs a good idea? Or should the grown-ups just, well, grow up?
Source: New York Times
Brett Singer is the editor-in-chief of DaddyTips.com. You can follow his tweets at Twitter.com/brettsinger.
Read more:
