Progressive, feminist, supposedly sex-positive parents are, of course,
pretty well united against the absurd excesses of abstinence-only
education and the religious no-sex-until-marriage frenzy.
What
continues to amaze me though, is how little the positions they do take
really vary from the underlying values of the abstinence worshippers.
As
a parent, I keep running into a nudge, nudge wink, wink understanding
that even though we know it’s not good to base policy on it, of course
really we all want to put off our daughters’ sexual awakenings as long
as possible (or at least until they’re out of the house). There are
jokes about chastity belts and not letting boyfriends come over until
age 30. Every once and a while I feel the urge to get out a calendar
and check the year.
I confess that I don’t get it. Not a
smidgen. And I don’t think this is just a matter of my having a
defective freak-out gene. I really think that this attitude is not in
our daughters’ best interests.
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