Although I have no intention of signing my kid up for some out-freaking-rageously priced headshots and an agent in an attempt to potty train him on the set of commercial for some high fructose food, I do take quite an interest in the parents of celebrities passed out...I mean, smiling...for the cameras.
I am very interested that the parents of stars like Lindsay Lohan, Britney Spears, Jessica Simpson, Nick Carter always have their roots done and rarely are photographed carrying a big ass bag full of contracts, tabloids and their kid's crap. I don't know exactly what's involved in being your super-famous child's manager or whatever those stage parents do, but I do spy a trend in how they handle it when their gazillion-dollar earning offspring (see above list) hit a rut, a bad patch, maybe even a tree with their car: They start pimpin' the next child in line.
And really, it's brilliant. Parents dreaming of raising up the Next Big Thing to hit TeenPeople, consider having more children and take note of how PR (as in Parental Relations) is handled for the for the stars: Britney's a bald, bad mama? Ohhhh, looky! Isn't Jamie Lynn purty in her party romper?
Forget the bad-mouthed, abusive big brother! His little bro's a big tatooed softy!
Lindsay's on the sauce again? Hey, check it out -- the celebrity gene runs in the family and I spawned them all!
The first-born's a bawling, clausterphobic, unmake-upped incarcerated mess? But look at her supportive and silky-skinned sister!
Never mind the divorced one with the God-awful acting "career", check out her little sis instead! She's perky and unscathed by sex, alcohol and Paris Hilton!
