When your kids misbehave, are you a ranter or a reasoner?
Genetically,
I'm a ranter who, until now, has fought hard to become the calm
reasoner. I've tried (unsuccessfully) to recreate myself into the kind
of mom who, in the heat of a child's blatant disregard for the sanctity
of a peaceful home and/or the delicate nature of my own sensitive
nerves, could quietly make "I" statements, talk about feeeeeelings and
sensibly redirect the defiant child into more acceptable actions or
self-expression. You know, so my kid could make better judgments, make
better choices, change her own behavior without so much damn
intervention (and talking and feeling and discussion -- or ranting).
But guess what? Not only are ranters barking up the wrong tree, reasoners aren't getting anywhere either.
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