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  • Meet Octo-Mom's Male Equivalent: Dad Has 86 Kids

    If this the were story of a mom of eighty-six kids, I'd be calling for someone to help stuff that uterus back up in there and sending her my sympathies. 

    The fact that there's a man out there with eighty-six kids and more on the way just gives me the creeps.

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  • Top 5 Movies for 2-Year-Olds

    The American Association of Podiatrists says kids shouldn't watch any television until they're 2, but with a birthday coming up, I thought I'd share some of the great movies we've already got in our daughter's NetFlix queue.

    Most people opt for something a little more family friendly, like "Cars" or "Jaws," but that's just silly. Kids can handle more than we give them credit for -- so why not start off their movie viewing experiences with something more edgy? She'll be the coolest kid in preschool, by far.

    1. The Exorcist

     

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  • Turns Out We Really Do Like the Oldest the Best

    Well, maybe it's not a question of liking them best. But according to this article, we definitely spend more quality time -- reading, talking, playing -- with our firstborn children. Like, 3,000 overall extra hours when those children are between the ages of 4 to 13. And the more kids we have, the less of that valuable time each successive offspring gets. These findings are based on a study recently published in the Journal of Human Resources.

    The gut reaction to a piece like this is to feel a. guilty and b. compelled to somehow compensate for the time middle/youngest child has lost by playing Connect Four with him for nine consecutive hours. But that's not necessarily the right response.

    Most parents would never, ever say they prefer one kid over the other. Most of us take pride in the notion that we treat all of our children equally, a founding principle upon which all of our families' Constitutions are based. The truth is, though, this is all just simple math. Once you have more kids, the less time you can spend with each one.

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  • What Does This Generation of Moms Want?

    multi-taskerThere's about a thousand headlines trying to define what moms of this generation want. Do we hope to return to the domestic spheres of the 1950's housewives (as has been reported), or are we career-minded? Do we care about our jobs or our kids? And one writer says we don't know what we want. When she works fulltime she can't wait to be home with family, but when she is on maternity leave she finds she hates staying at home. She gets a work-from-home freelance career but misses office action, and when she goes back to the office she chafes at the set hours that make her miss her kids. In short, women of this day and age have no idea what they want. What they really, really want.

    I actually know what women want. Every woman really wants...

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  • Should Dads Play Video Games with their Kids?

    gamerShould fathers play video games with their children? God, I hope so. Although, I myself am not a dad, I am a parent and both of my children can sing "Shout at the Devil" because we let them play "Guitar Hero II" with us. Aw, come on. It's fun for the whole family. Didn't we all play Pac Man with our dads anyway? I know I did.

    Anyway, there are various theories on how beneficial playing video games with your kids can be. A lot of dads feel like it is a great way to bond with their children. Some experts insist that these kids will not develop proper social skills.

    I say a lot of it probably depends on what kind of game you are playing. I'm guessing if you are playing Grand Theft Auto with your five year old it probably isn't that healthy, but if you are playing some interactive educational age-appropriate game with your child it can be a great way to spend quality time together, especially if the weather is crappy.

    Just save Manhunt 2 until the kids are at least in high school.
     


  • Family Rituals that Don't Involve Sacrificing Virgins or Blood-Letting

    There's probably nothing special about the special little moments we share with our little boy in my family. For every family hug and kiss we have before bedtime, you probably have a silly dance or song you must play when stuck in traffic in the minivan. For every turn we have in the hide-the-bobble-head-around-the-house game (no really, it's kid-friendly, I swear), you have your Friday night TPing of the in-laws' house or Bugaboo-in at the park down the street. Families, especially those with parents who get that their little ones love schedules and special attention that doesn't compete with an iPhone or Idol, have rituals. Rituals are good. Rituals are soothing. Rituals break the monotony of the fact that you are simultaneously changing the fifth poopsplosion diaper of the day or making turkey roll-ups for dinner. Again.

    If your family's lacking rituals, the New Homemaker's got some tips on how to incorporate them into your daily, weekly or annual life with your kids (which you are welcome to read while cringing along with me over the name of the site). The ideas aren't anything revolutionary -- they range from things like singing "Born in the USA" on the 4th of July to having indoor picnics on the living room floor -- but we all know those no-cost, simple moments can really let your kids (and mostly, you) geek out to your family's geekiest desire.

    And while you're rolling your eyes at the thought of instituting a Chutes & Ladders night with screaming kids, take a moment for the reality check: You might spend thousands and thousands of dollars toting your tots to Disneyland or buying a deluxe swing set for backyard fun, but your kids will inevitably look back fondly on their favorite toy, the cardboard box, and their favorite childhood memory, eating off the fancy birthday plate you picked up at a garage sale for a quarter.



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