Under the heading “A devil food is turning our kids into homosexuals,” some dickhead homophobe named Jim Rutz has written a commentary contending that soy makes kids gay. (Mr. Rutz is also rumored to believe that Spaghetti-Os turn you Mexican and Cheerios make you black.)
“Soy is feminizing,” he says, “and commonly leads to a decrease in the size of the penis, sexual confusion and homosexuality. That’s why most of the medical (not socio-spiritual) blame for today’s rise in homosexuality must fall upon the rise in soy formula and other soy products.”
He’s basically saying we’d all be a lot better off if we fed the kids a healthy, Republican diet. Lots of red meat and dairy products and whiskey. Then we could all grow up to look rotund and miserable like Dick Cheney, which is essentially the way the rest of the world views Americans anyway.
Who is this guy Rutz? What qualification does he have to make this absurd declaration? As I read his homophobic drivel, I see no mention that he did any sort of independent research. As all of the great hate-mongers of our time have done to support their causes, this asshole has simply stolen statistics and coordinated without context to support his assertion that we must drastically reduce our children’s soy intake before they all become – gasp! – fags.
Notice that in his attempt scare our kids into Heteroville, Rutz has link homosexuality to leukemia, breast cancer, infertility and testicular atrophy.
A confession: I go to Starbucks EVERY DAY and order an iced, venti SOY latte. I have been doing so for five years. Yet despite Rutz The Putz’s assessment, I have not noticed a decrease in my penis size, I am not “sexually confused” and I have not turned gay.
That said, I am cordially inviting Jim Rutz to suck my dick.
