I knew it was only a matter of time before someone would find out
what we parents already know to be true: that the sleep difficulties of our
kids cause health problems in ourselves. I'm just wondering why it took
the experts so long to figure this out, because as a parent, it's
clear. 10,000 Australian familes were studied, and they found that
parents of children with sleep problems, in particular the mothers of
those children, had more health and psychological problems then did their
counterparts, the lucky parents of children who slept well.
It only makes
sense. If your sleep is interrupted nightly by cries of "Mama! I had a
bad dream!" or by the middle-of-the-night addition of small bodies to
your already-crowded bed, you're gonna suffer. Which accounts for the
popularity of coffee. And naptime.
So,
what do do? Besides Xanax, I mean (for the kid, not you)? Well, this is
where the article fizzles a little. There's some vague talk about
"controlled crying", but don't get me started on that
one. And there's a mention also of "sleep resistance" by pre-schoolers,
now there's an awesome term! I imagine that my parents would have
called it "brattiness", or, more likely, "grounds for a spanking."
Hardcore, they were! Here are my suggestions:
1. One tiny drink, for them. Of water. before they ask for it.
2. A much larger one, for you. Of the libation of your choice.
3. Have a ritual, and stick to it. It could be lighting a candle, singing a song, making a threat. Just stick to it.
4. No caving on the requests.
5. Absolutely not.
6. I said no!
7. I already told you no.
8. NO!! ISAIDNODAMMIT!!!
9. Repeat 2, above, as often as necessary.
10. Wait ten years. It'll sort itself out.
