Strollerderby : Ada Calhoun

5-Minute Time Out: Dr. Penelope Leach

editors — Thu, 07 May 2009 19:45:00 GMT

Today on Babble:

5-Minute Time Out: Dr. Penelope Leach

by Ada Calhoun.

Working parents are in an "impossible situation," confirms childcare expert Penelope Leach.

Read it here.

Salma Hayek Shines Spotlight on Breastfeeding Taboos

Hannah Tennant-Moore — Thu, 12 Feb 2009 19:30:00 GMT

As most people know by now, Salma Hayek’s very public breastfeeding in Sierra Leone was not just a moment of compassion for a hungry child. It was that, but it was also a calculated—and noble—attempt to dispel the notion in some parts of Africa that breastfeeding women can’t have sex. Given this entrenched belief, you can probably guess how husbands feel about their wives breastfeeding.

It’s easy to see such an urban legend as shocking, but, as Ada Calhoun points out in TIME, the U.S. certainly has its fair share of breastfeeding taboos—most notably, against cross-nursing. Indeed, many media outlets and online commenters were disgruntled at best by the YouTube video of Hayek nursing another woman’s child. (EW.com awarded the video “biggest eyebrow-raiser” of the day.)

According to Calhoun, no American institution will support informal cross-nursing, citing concerns about “the possibility of transmitting infections, a decrease in supply for the donor's own baby, psychological confusion on the part of the infant, and the fact that the composition of breast milk changes as children get older.”

Hayek’s very public cross-nursing demonstrated that there are certainly instances in which none of these concerns are relevant. The Sierra Leonean baby she breastfed was born on the same day as her daughter and Hayek knew him to be healthy. She’s not in any danger of her milk running dry from one emergency feeding, and no one would argue that any “psychological confusion” the baby boy may have experienced outweighed the benefits of assuaging his hunger.

Photo: The Daily Mail

Girl with Bowel Disease Kept Alive on Donated Breastmilk

Salma Hayek Breastfeeds Hungry Baby in Africa

Babble Talk: Dealing With Post-Inaugural Guilt

Jen Chaney — Thu, 29 Jan 2009 13:02:00 GMT

Ada Calhoun, the editor of this here Web site, recently wrote an essay about how she traveled to Washington, D.C. -- with child in tow -- to see the inauguration of President Barack Obama. Despite the warnings about huge crowds, frigid temperatures, Port-a-Potty heinosity and an overall uncomfortable environment for kids, she made the journey anyway and has no regrets about doing so.

"I've never experienced anything like being in a crowd of almost two million silent, rapt people, nor will I probably ever again," she writes. "I looked down at my son, sitting on my lap under a sleeping bag, staring at the Jumbotron, hypnotized by Obama's face and voice, and the speech hit home in a way it might not have had I been unencumbered."

I read that piece, and felt moved by it. And then I felt incredibly, incredibly guilty.

I live in Bethesda, Md., just outside of D.C. And after debating about whether to bring my young son to the National Mall to witness history, I decided not to. I am still not sure if it was the right move.

Of course, I had my reasons. For starters, I needed to get some work done on Inauguration Day, and, as part of that work, also was expected to be downtown by 6 p.m., in a floor-length dress, to cover one of the evening's many balls. I feared that if I got stuck in some sort of post-swearing-in melee, I'd never be able to get home, change clothes and report for duty on time.

Then there was the issue of bringing my little boy, who is almost two. Since strollers were banned from the Mall, I couldn't trot him around in one of those. And the notion of dragging him by the hand or carrying him all day, potentially for hours on end in the bitter cold, did not sound fun.

And let's not forget that here in the Washington area, we had been hearing for weeks on local newcasts that Inauguration Day would be a disaster of unprecedented proportions. Six million people flooding the streets of D.C.! Hours of waiting to get on the Metro! The broadcast reporters don't usually get this panicked unless something really serious -- like snow -- is headed for Washington.

I know: Excuses, excuses. But I had made up my mind. And then I started spending time at some pre-inaugural events in D.C. during the days leading up to The Big Day. And I began to question that decision. As Ada notes, there was an undeniable feeling of excitement in the city, the unmistakeable aura of history unfolding around us, even before anyone started traipsing toward the U.S. Capitol. Could I forgive myself, I wondered, if I missed this important moment -- and deprived my son of missing it -- when it was happening in my own backyard?

On Jan. 19, I asked my husband this very same question: Do you think we should go? He immediately voted no. He thought it would be too hard with our wiggleworm of a son. And since we both were able to work from home that day -- a day our son also could spend in daycare, giving us the freedom to actually get some things accomplished without interruption -- my husband said he really wanted to take advantage of that and just watch the inauguration on TV together, as a couple, in our warm, uncrowded house.

So that's what we did. Meanwhile, our son watched Obama put his hand on the Bible at an inauguration party that was held at his daycare center. The moment came. The moment went. And that was that.

Given all the horror stories about people who got trapped in the Third Street Tunnel, or waited for hours and couldn't even get on to the Mall, it may have been the right decision. But when I read stories like Ada's, I can't help but think that moments like this only happen once and that we need to embrace them. Not only that, but we need to embrace them with our children by our sides, so they can start to understand what the term "shared history" really means.

I'm not going to spend a lot of time fretting over the whole thing. What's done is done. All I can do, really, is be thankful that I was able to play a small part in the overall inaugural weekend, and be thankful, too, that my son and his fellow toddlers got to see it on TV. And I can try to learn a lesson from my regret so that the next time a major event is about to transpire, instead of saying, "Nah, we can't," maybe I'll be more likely to say: "Yes. We can."

Babble Talk: Dr. Jane Aronson - Adoption Rules

aprilpeveteaux — Mon, 24 Sep 2007 18:44:00 GMT

Thinking about adoption but afraid that a) all the good ones are gone; b) people will think you’re copying Angelina; or c) that do-gooding money could be better spent on a Prius? Dr. Jane Aronson, pediatrician, adoption specialist and founder of the Worldwide Orphans Foundation sat down with Ada Calhoun in this week’s Infant Industry and explained why you would be wrong in those assumptions.

Dr. Aronson has been dedicated in her quest to ensure the health of adopted (international and domestic) children for over a decade, working closely with many of those celebrities we love to analyze. Aronson gives clean answers to the muddy questions that arise around the subject of adoption and dismantles typical fears without sugar coating the realities of adopting from countries that are plagued by AIDS and other infectious diseases. And while guessing the reproductive status of the Jolie-Pitt family is practically a daily sport here at Babble, the doctor also explains why we really should look to Angelina as role model, rather than punch line.

StrollerDerby Playdate: Women of Babble Edition

Rachael Brownell (Redsy) — Mon, 11 Jun 2007 10:58:00 GMT

Babble has been around now since last Fall, and it's increasingly a gathering place for live-out-loud, sassy, funny, whip-smart mamas and papas, their strong opinions, leather outfits, and big brains. There are, of course, the snarktastic women of StrollerDerby, Sarah, Kelly, Karen, Melissa, Stefania, Alisyn, Patti, and Jessica.

And the fabulous personal bloggers California Breedin, Straight from the Bottle, Baby Squared, and Knocked Up. Queen Ada writes kick-ass editor's notes on topics ranging from step-mothering to the parental time crunch. And now the ladies are helping us watch celebri-tots, and drool over gorgeous baby swag.

Sometimes mothering when one is neither June Cleaver nor Courtney Love is a scary lonely business. Mainstream parenting magazines often miss the whole messy, funny point of growing into motherhood -- that it's not all roses and smiles, that it's complicated deep and enriching. And that when you find other people who write their experience in an authentic way, it's more than heartening: it's life-saving.

Babble Talk: Rock Camp for Girls!

Rachael Brownell (Redsy) — Wed, 02 May 2007 21:06:00 GMT

Ada Calhoun's Babble piece on rock camp for girls will make you salivate. Are you pondering how to counteract the Bratz and Barbie and "Sex Kitten 69" t-shirts you see young girls wearing? This rock camp is the way to go, my friend.

Calhoun interviews founder (and lawyer and a brillion other things) mama Hanna Fox, who spun off the program from a similar one in Portland back in 2004.

Fox notes that music is really only a proxy, a tool used to teach girls about empowerment and self-expression. And? they learn self-defense as well as performance (heeeYAAA).

And did you hear there's even a rock camp for mamas now? THAT would rock.

Grups, Hipsters, Trendsters, Xers: Label Me, Label You, Uh Huh

Rachael Brownell (Redsy) — Mon, 05 Feb 2007 16:17:00 GMT

Z Recommends has a thoughtful post about Lisa Carver's review of Neal Pollack's Alternadad (you can read Neal's response here), in which he points out that blogs with an edgy, cynical, or ironic take on parenting seem to dominate the mommy and daddy blogosphere. Reading the sniping comments on the Pollack and Carver pieces, you'd have to conclude that parents today -- at least those who are blogging and commenting -- are a bunch of angry, labeling, cliquish malcontents.

The labels thrown around with the most vitriol seem to be those associated with the likes of Babble, including "hipster," "grup," and "trendy." Some of those labels are well-deserved, but as with all labels they tend to over-generalize and foreshorten real dialogue and debate.

In her piece summing up the Pollack/Carver debate, Babble editor Ada Calhoun concludes wisely that "the irony label (like "grup") is dismissive and cheap...and the rush to cry "hipster" undermines the opportunity to talk about what's thrilling and funny and lonely and scary about having kids."

I've been overwhelmed at times by pressure to be cool and clever while writing for Stroller Derby, but when I succumb to that, I miss the point. Babble contributors are everyday people experiencing parenting. If we swear and drink more than the average bear, than so be it. But if we could all drop the labels and get along, wouldn't this just be one hell of a lot more fun?