Strollerderby : Eddie Murphy

Comedians From The Past Weigh In On The First Black President

Brett Singer — Sat, 08 Nov 2008 22:00:00 GMT

Barack Obama being elected is a historic moment. One way to realize just how historic is through comedy. OK, we don't actually need to realize how historic this moment is. But it is interesting to look at how the idea of a Black President was viewed in the past.

First up, this Richard Pryor sketch where he plays the leader of the free world. It's a little long, and it was the 70's, so some of the humor is a little dopey and dated. For example, there's a moment towards the end when a reporter asks about his mother. Pryor as President responds, "What did you just ask me?" The reporter says, "I’m talking about your momma!" Etc. Here's the video:

Richard Pryor, 1st Black President

This is much more interesting. Remember Eddie Murphy's Delirious? Easily one of the funniest comedy albums/tv specials of all time. Eddie had some things to say about African-American politicians, in particular Jesse Jackson running for President. Here's the video, which is riddled with four-letter words and is NOT safe for work or children (unless you decide it is):

Eddie Murphy on the First Black President

That was 1983. Looong time ago. I'd love to call Eddie Murphy and ask him if what he thinks of this election. Sadly, Eddie's not talking to me right now.

Last (this is in chronological order), here is a Chris Rock bit about a Black VICE president from Saturday Night Live. Chris said (this was many years ago, as you can tell by his unfortunate hairdo) that the country would never have a Black Vice-President. So far, he's right. As for the notion that we'd never have a Black President? Luckily, everybody was wrong about that one. (If the clip won't play, click here.)

Chris Rock, first Black Vice President

The Obamas Are a Great First Family

The Obama Kids Get a New Puppy

Girl Power in the White House

They say: Obama Wins

Who's Your Daddy? Celebrity Paternity Poker

Rachael Brownell (Redsy) — Fri, 14 Sep 2007 23:13:00 GMT

Ever wonder why some babies look like totally unlike their daddies? Ever have a sneaking suspicion that the dad of record, may not be the dad that wrecked her? It all started with the Mapother-Cruise Conspiracy Theory... but we suspect there's a large-scale sauce swap going on... Take a look at these matches and see what you think...

Tom Brady daddy to Liam McDermitt??

You know, cuz, someone with a mama named Candy couldn't possibly be home-wrecker...And, honestly? I think Dean and Tom Brady are one and the same person..

Boy George daddy to Lindsay Lohan?

Here are Dina and Boy spending some fast times together in the 80s... You do the math!

Spinal Tap band member, Christopher Guest, Britney Spears Daddy?

As they say, the crazy ass showing apple doesn't fall far from the tree....

For more fun with Paternity Poker, go here...

Best of FameCrawler. Heidi Klum Chronicles

Rachael Brownell (Redsy) — Fri, 17 Aug 2007 19:25:00 GMT

Today's Famecrawler post brought to you by Sweat Pants Mom.

Remember how, after giving birth, it felt great to slip into your size 2 jeans, bare your breasts and get your picture taken? Yeah, me neither. But Heidi Klum is doing all that, and less than a year after giving birth to her third child. Klum is featured in a provocative series of ads for Jordache jeans and the effects of gravity and sleepless nights are nowhere to be found. It even baffled my husband, who insisted on studying this photograph for an entire fifteen minutes to try and figure out how she does it.

Although Klum says she maintains her hot bod (technical term) by staying active with her kids, she also cops to having some help. "There were 20, 30 people on set to take the pictures...So I don't have to do that much. They all make me look good." Now I don't feel so bad - it usually only takes 10 to 15 people to make me look good enough to walk out the door.

Other FameCrawler news items:

The latest in the Scary Spice v. Eddie Murphy match
Another gorgeous celeb denies pregnancy rumors
Hair band baby-making continues

[photo: PRNews-Jordache / AP]

Hollywood Breakups: Use the Tabloids

Kelly Mills — Thu, 31 May 2007 21:11:00 GMT

Mary Jo Eustace, ex of Dean McDermott, found out her husband was leaving her for Tori Spelling when a gossip columnist called and asked her about the affair. On her birthday weekend, no less. Right after they adopted a baby. Niiiice. Now she's written about it in an essay for a book called, The Other Woman: Twenty-one Wives, Lovers, and Others Talk Openly About Sex, Deception, Love, and Betrayal, which comes out June 13.

Apparently the best way to break the news that a relationship is over in Hollywood is to let your partner know via tabloid or talk show. That way both people have a chance to collect themselves before the inevitable face-to-face encounter and subsequent requests from the press for more quotes. On the jerk-ometer, it's one step below texting your significant other, "we r thru." It's also a great way to get yourself a little exposure while you deal with the dumping. Win-win!

The method may have been made popular by rumors that Matt Damon dumped Minnie Driver on Oprah about a million years ago. That breakup is now reported to have been an urban legend, but it didn't stop Eddie Murphy from using this simple strategy, telling a Dutch show he was no longer with Melanie "Scary Spice" Brown. Then he went one better: he claimed he didn't know whose baby she was carrying. Scary found all this out when worried friends called her. Good one Eddie.

Now, if you end up having to dump your spouse the old-fashioned way, you can still make the most of the tabloid for the inevitable post-split feud. You know, just talk about how your ex is addicted to porn and gambling. Who says tabloids aren't good for anything?

Scary Spice to Eddie Murphy: "Be Responsible"

Stefania Pomponi Butler (CityMama) — Fri, 04 May 2007 20:03:00 GMT

Scary Spice a.k.a. Mel B. a.k.a. Melanie Brown's PR campaign against Eddie Murphy is relentless, and I say, "Go on, girl!"

Not only is she claiming that Eddie Murphy is her baby daddy, but now she says the pair planned the pregnancy. Says Scary, "The crazy thing is, this baby was planned, and he knows it’s his. This is what is mind-boggling.”

Her message for Murphy is simple, "Be responsible."

Murphy refuses to acknowledge the baby, Angel Iris Murphy Brown, is his, and will not take a paternity test. Despite that fact, Mel B. listed Murphy as Angel's father on her birth certificate and gave her his name. A woman that confident cannot have any doubts about the paternity, and you'd think she'd know.

Adding to the strangeness, Angel and Eddie share the same birthday. If that's not the universe telling you something, I don't know what is.

[photo: Celebrity Moms]

Believe It Or Not: Pregnant Women Still Shouldn’t Smoke

Kelly Mills — Thu, 03 May 2007 12:04:00 GMT

A new study indicates that smoking during pregnancy can have bad effects on the cardiovascular health of offspring. Researchers treated pregnant rats with nicotine, then tested the heart function of the babies three months after delivery. They found that nicotine decreased coronary blood flow in the female rats. Both male and female rats were more susceptible to heart injury. No word yet on why female rats fared worse. Just add it to the list of messed up things women have to deal with, like salary inequity and mom pants.

The study is part of new research called “fetal programming of cardiovascular disease” which looks at a number of things during fetal development that affect long term heart health. And of course, previous studies have showed smoking is not so good for developing fetuses. It has been tied to a higher rate of SIDS and to asthma, as well as a greater risk of heart disease into adulthood.

But if you didn’t know about the problems with smoking and pregnancy, here’s a few more things pregnant women should avoid: drinking lye; swordplay; sucking on car tailpipes; riding mechanical bulls; K-Fed and Eddie Murphy; eating mysterious mushrooms you found in the woods; and crack.

Scary Spice Melanie Brown Names Her Baby After Eddie Murphy

Stefania Pomponi Butler (CityMama) — Tue, 24 Apr 2007 19:04:00 GMT

Suck it, Eddie Murphy! Even if you say you aren't the father of Mel B./Melanie Brown/Scary Spice's baby, she feels confident enough that you are to name her daughter after your sorry ass. The latest addition to the Scary Spice clan is Angel Iris Murphy Brown. (Murphy Brown, heh.) You know it!

Brown has claimed all along that Murphy is the father of her baby, and Murphy has claimed all along that he isn't and wants a paternity test. We all know that the implication is that Brown slept with other dudes and therefore can't possibly know who her babydaddy is. But if girlfriend is confident enough to give her newborn Eddie's name (and put his name on the birth certificate), I think that speaks volumes.

Eddie Murphy: shut your big ole mouth and take the paternity test. Then sack up and start being a father to the baby you know is yours.

Scary Spice Puts Eddie Murphy's Name on Baby's Birth Certificate

Rachael Brownell (Redsy) — Thu, 12 Apr 2007 16:18:00 GMT

Eddie Murphy needs to keep it in his pants, or maybe he should consider the snip-snip. He has five kids by (at least) three different women and now, according to Melanie Brown (Scary Spice) he's implicated in yet another baby.

Not surprisingly, Murphy is questioning the child's paternity (he's no dummy). And I quote:
"I don't know whose child that is, until it comes out and has a blood test." [Emphasis added]. Until it comes out?? The humanity is stunning.

In any event, let's hope for Melanie and the baby's sake, he ponies up the cash to support the kid, should it prove to be his. Where are Howard and Larry when we need them?

[Photo Credit: People Magazine]

Melanie "Scary Spice" Brown Welcomes Baby Girl

Alisyn — Tue, 03 Apr 2007 18:03:00 GMT

Melanie Brown gave birth to a healthy baby girl early today in L.A. It is the second child for the former Spice Girl, who has an 8 year-old daughter, Phoenix Chi, from her marriage to British dancer Jimmy Gulzar.

Controversy and rumors have surrounded Mel's pregnancy since she and former boyfriend Eddie Murphy - who she claims is her newborn's father - broke up earlier this spring. Or rather, since he unceremoniously dumped her, in the middle of her pregnancy, live on Dutch television. While Eddie claims no one knows for sure who the father is, Mel claims that it can only be Eddie. Only a paternity test, which is in the works, can tell for sure. (Is it an ironic twist, or a strange coincidence that Baby Brown was born today - which happens to be Eddie Murphy's birthday??)

Baby Brown has yet to be named - stay tuned for updates! Congratulations to Mama and Baby.

Pregnant Spice Girl Attacked by Eddie Murphy's Fans

Sarah, Goon Squad Sarah — Thu, 11 Jan 2007 03:19:00 GMT

The headline reads "Pregnant Melanie B attacked by Murphy’s fans".

Now, assuming you, like me had no idea that Eddie Murphy ever even dated the former Spice Girl, you would be bewildered and laughing your ass off.

Well, I thought it sounded pretty funny. I know, I shouldn't laugh at a pregnant woman getting attacked, but the idea of a little Eddie Murphy fan club accosting Scary Spice is comical.

I guess Melanie and Eddie were dating and things didn't work out. Now she is expecting a child that she insists belongs to him. Eddie Murphy is not so sure and is insisting that DNA testing be done after the child is born.

Does anyone else think that the offspring of Eddie Murphy and Scary Spice would be a bit - high-spirited?