Strollerderby : Gawker

Bart Simpson-Scientologist

Brett Singer — Sun, 01 Feb 2009 21:00:00 GMT

Telemarketing is annoying. Robocalls, telemarketing via robot, even more so. But a robocall that promotes a cult using the voice of a cartoon character popular with kids?

Very very bad.

Nancy Cartwright is the voice of Bart Simpson. She is also a Scientologist who reportedly gave more than $10 million to the religion/cult in 2007. (Wow. Voice acting pays better than I thought.) If she wants to give her money to an organization that promises to rid her body of aliens (or whatever it is that Scientologists believe), that's her right.

Nancy, however, wants more people to realize the benefits of Dianetics and giving your money away. Listen to this:

First I have to say that I have no idea what the hell she is talking about (man). "I'm now auditing on new OT VII." "OT" doesn't mean "occupation therapy"; it stands for "Operating Thetan." Which is "a spiritual state above Clear." Which means... you know what? I'm going to stop there because I don't even want to know. This stuff makes my brain hurt.

Why even write about this? Because it annoys me that Cartwright is using a character that kids might identify with to promote this nonsense. Personally, I think Scientology is a cult. But even if you give them the benefit of the doubt and call it a religion, it's still wrong. Obviously she thinks that using Bart's voice on the call is the equivalent of a kid running for student council president putting "Free Beer! Now That I Have Your Attention..." on her posters. (Which I think was something Homer did in a Simpsons episode.) Who is likely to be intrigued by hearing that voice? A kid who likes The Simpsons, right? "Hey dad! I just heard that the lady who does Bart Simpson's voice is going to be appearing someplace. Something about aliens. Sounds cool. Can we go?"

Is this line of thinking overwrought? Maybe. But Fox disavowed the call, so they clearly saw something wrong with it. I don't know if they can do anything to Cartwright; she didn't release a video with Bart's image or something else that was obviously a copyright violation. I hope that somebody sits Nancy down and explains to her that she's entitled to believe whatever she wants, but when she starts using Bart's voice to convince other people to believe in the same thing, she may find out that there are a lot of actors who can do a damn fine Bart Simpson impression.

(For lots of reasons why people think Scientology is not only creepy but dangerous, check out this site.)

Source: Gawker , Village Voice

Image: The Sun

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Bad Baby Ads; Just What Are They Selling?

Mike Adamick (Cry It Out!) — Tue, 04 Nov 2008 13:28:00 GMT

If I hadn't read the story over at Gawker -- or seen the logo flashed at the end of the commercial -- I would have guessed, oh, say, diapers. But no, they're selling jeans. Wranglers jeans.

When you think Wranglers, do you think crawling baby?

You tell me -- is this just odd?

UPDATE - Sarah Palin Grades Are a Forgery and the Aftermath

SunnyChanel — Wed, 15 Oct 2008 03:07:00 GMT

Last week, one of those pert near irresistible and deliciously delectable internet rumors was going around that someone had found what appeared to be Sarah Palin’s very mediocre high school and SAT scores. At the time, most took it with a grain of salt, and had a shadow a doubt that they were real (although many wished they were). The story was picked up by Gawker, Daily Kos, Wonkette, Just Jared and even Babble.com , among many many others. It was recently discovered that the grades are indeed a forgery and the photoshop artist who created it lifted writer Dawn Eden’s own scoresheet to use a template. But the story doesn’t end here. Here is a play by play of the controvery around the Sarah Palin’s SAT scores forgery.

Round 1 – a copy of what is touted as Sarah Palin’s senior high school grades and her SAT scores circulates around the internet.

Round 2 – Gawker, finding out they are fake, pens a piece entitled ”Sarah Palin's SAT Scores Actually Belong to Born-Again Virgin Dawn Eden”. They state, “So Eden’s the one with the bad scores? How bizarre?”

Round 3 - Eden is understandably upset by this, especially since the person responsible for the forgery had lowered the grades, lashed out on her blog over the weekend (the post has been revised, she had previously pulled out the much dreaded “slander” word.) She contacted Gawker to have the post corrected.

Round 4 - Gawker made some changes to their post. The title went from “Sarah Palin’s SAT Scores Actually Belong to Born-Again Virgin Dawn Eden” to “Sarah Palin's Fake SAT Scores Actually Belong to Born-Again Virgin Dawn Eden” and added, “How bizarre. So Eden's the one with the 425 Verbal? Not really: whoever forged it "lowered the grades and scores on the printout to make Palin, an honor-society member, look like a mediocre student."”

The truth that the piece was a forgery is now the hot story and is making the internet circles with such pieces being posted like “"Obamasphere So Scary Smart It's Taken In By Another Moronic Hoax." and "Fake Palin SAT Scores Fool Left-O-Sphere." Also a poster from Daily Kos and a writer from Examiner.com have apologized for attributing the grades to Palin/Eden. Hopefully the fight is over, but I think everybody bears some bruises.

Doris Lessing is cranky, old, fun

Brett Singer — Mon, 04 Aug 2008 19:00:00 GMT

Sometimes it's nice to point out an article, or in this case a couple of articles, that feature smart women. Especially smart, accomplished women who speak their minds and don't care what anyone thinks.

Doris Lessing, a recent Nobel Prize winning writer, definitely fits the bill. How many people win a Nobel Prize and then say, "If I may be catty, Sweden doesn't have anything else."

Or this gem: "I hear girls saying, 'Oh I'm not going to bring a child into this wicked world,' which means they are going to be pregnant next week."

Both of those quotes are from a recent Time magazine interview she did (link via Gawker). There was also a piece in the Sunday New York Times Magazine where she talked about some other topics, mostly her latest work, "Alfred & Emily". The book is described as two novellas: one where she tells her mother's actual life story, then writes another one in which her mother is depicted "as she should have been if she had not been messed up by World War I." Something about that idea fascinated me. Sort of a "here's her life, and here's what should have happened had she been born into a better situation."

The new book will probably be her last, because, at 88 years young, she has "run out of energy completely." In the Time article she offers some advice to us younger scribes: "Don't assume you'll have it forever. Use it while you've got it, because it'll go; it's sliding away like water down a plug hole."

Now, she also said this about current conditions of Zimbabwe, where she grew up many years ago when it was known as Southern Rhodesia: "It's ruined. Under the whites it was an extremely efficient country. It could grow absolutely anything. We had railways and post offices and roads and water that worked. You can't just put that back overnight." The Gawker commenters rightly slam her for that, although its possible that there is more to what she said, since Zimbabwe is currently a bit of a mess, what with some countries claiming that Mugabe's Presidency is illegitimate. She was also, according to Gawker, "barred from South African and Rhodesia for denouncing apartheid." I'm not trying to excuse what she said, but I don't think it's in the same league as Imus' "Nappy Headed Ho's" riff.

I freely admit that I've never read a Doris Lessing novel, so I have no idea if she's "worthy" of a Nobel Prize or not. But I always appreciate it when someone says what's on her mind, especially someone who has lived a long time and accomplished a great deal. We get to hear plenty of old men talking, both wise and not-so-wise. So let's give the ladies a shot too.

image: nytimes

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Political Nanny: Did John Edwards Father a Love Child?

Madeline Holler — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 18:34:00 GMT

Although it pains Political Nanny a bit to jump in on rumors about politicians' illicit affairs, she's interested to see where this one goes.

The National Enquirer is reporting (grain of salt, grain of salt) that they've finally uncovered evidence that the only plausible white, male Democratic candidate for the 2008 election -- John Edwards -- has been cheating on his dying wife with a sort of member of his now defunct campaign, Rielle Hunter. Not only that, the two made a little baby together. Awwww. Wait, ewwwww. Political Nanny is confused.

From Gawker:

Vice Presidential candidate Sen. John Edwards was caught visiting his mistress and secret love child at 2:40 this morning in a Los Angeles hotel by the NATIONAL ENQUIRER.

The married ex-senator from North Carolina - whose wife Elizabeth continues to battle cancer — met with his mistress, blonde divorcee Rielle Hunter, at the Beverly Hilton on Monday night July 21 - and the NATIONAL ENQUIRER was there! He didn't leave until early the next morning.

From the Enquirer:

Edwards denied the affair and that he was the father, and in a bizarre twist, a close friend of his, Andrew Young, said he was the father. Young, 41, was married at the time with three children. The NATIONAL ENQUIRER has learned he still is married.

Will the allegations stick? The last 2008 candidate accused of an affair was John McCain. Seems a press conference, a cozy relationship with reporters, a little distraction called "the Democratic Primary" and, maybe even, the truth took care of that.

Political Nanny will keep you posted. (She knows, you feel sick in your stomach right now, huh?)

Photo: Gawker

Political Nanny: Oba-crombie & Fitch

Madeline Holler — Wed, 23 Apr 2008 22:03:00 GMT

Hold on to your Hallie strapless tanks and Phelps Mountain twill shorts! Political Nanny has uncovered a mysterious alliance between skimpy clothing hustlers Abercrombie & Fitch and inspirational first runner-up of last night's Democratic primaries.

During Barack's concession speech, one couldn't help but notice three -- three! -- frat-boy types sporting "Fitch" and "A&F" crewneck T's and standing behind the sometimes-presumptive-but-never-for-certain Democratic nominee.

Was this his campaign's way of pandering to the gay voter, as Gawker speculates? Or his way of showing that Hillary Clinton isn't the only candidate that can appeal to the white male dunderhead? Perhaps just bad stage management?

CNN will apparently be addressing this in the Situation Room tonight. Because. It matters?

Crayola Intros Kid-Named Colors

Kelly Mills — Mon, 14 Apr 2008 18:31:00 GMT

In case you hadn't heard, Crayola has slid in eight newly-named colors to the big box of crayons. Now if I were them, I'd spend my development money adding some structural reinforcement the black crayon, since its frequent use means it's the first one to break in half and force you to do outlines with that annoying little stubby crayon. Ahem. Anyhow, the new color names aren't as descriptive as you might hope, and I think the whole kid-named thing is a sham.

So, what kind of monikers do we have in the box now? "Super Happy (yellow), Fun in the Sun (orange), Giving Tree (green), Bear Hug (brown), Awesome (dusty pink), Happy Ever After (blue), Famous (hot pink) and Best Friends (purple)." Uh, yeah. Naturally some bloggers have had fun coming up with alternatives. But my beef is this: While Crayola says they developed the names with online input from kids, you know these aren't the names kids would actually develop if they had the chance. Yellow would be "Pee Pee Head", green would be "Troll Booger", brown would be "Pants Crap"...and so on. Just call me a realist.

It's Here! Pretentious Baby Names Contest!

Kelly Mills — Wed, 11 Jul 2007 20:03:00 GMT

Okay folks, warm up your mousing hand and head on over to Gawker to vote for the Most Pretentious Baby Name ever ever of all time for eternity and beyond. There's a poll with the finalists. I dunno, they are all awfully pretty, it's gonna be hard to choose. Try saying them with the same inflection you'd use for "Hah-vard" and maybe that will help narrow the field.

Here's the finalists:

-Panache

-Dillinger

-Goldman

-Epitome

-Palmares

-Gingerly

If you'd like to place bets on the winner in some kind of pool for money, feel free. Cuz there's no such thing as illegal gambling on the internet. Um, since I'm based in Guam. I'll take Paypal for this one.

Countdown for Pretentious Baby Names Contest

Kelly Mills — Tue, 10 Jul 2007 12:29:00 GMT

The moment we've all been waiting for is almost here. Today, Gawker (a site I love so much it almost makes me start lactating again) will post the finalists in the Pretentious Baby Names contest. Dress up in a gown and have a party with nachos and martinis! Make a drinking game out of it! Pray your child Branston doesn't take home the gold!

The semifinalists demonstrate the competition will be pretty darn stiff for this one. They liked Fayemus, but I just can't over Dulcimer. Perhaps if we'd gone that naming route with our progeny, a typical college day would involve racing home from dressage to work on her thesis on Kant and Camille Paglia with some nice prog rock playing in the background, because she finds it "so utterly soothing." Instead, her roommates will probably have to rip the beer bong from her hands before she starts flashing her tits out the window again. Lord, we suck at branding.

By the way, I doubt Metallica will be on the list. You know, we'll never, ever let that one go. It feeds my soul.

Suburban MILF Pole Dance Parties

Kelly Mills — Thu, 31 May 2007 12:03:00 GMT

Gawker pointed us to the Today Show segment on suburban moms getting together and having stripper pole dance parties. Because that's soooo newsworthy. Next week Ann Curry will be covering SAHMs who sometimes kiss each other on the lips. This piece featured some ladies gathering together, having a couple glasses of wine, and then making name tags with their stripper names. Sticky tags, as in, "Hi, my name is Candi." Hint for the moms: those name tags aren't very stripper. But neither is the name one woman chose- Tootsie. That's like being Cuddles the Stripper.

I'm sure you can imagine the rest. Some women in mom jeans and feather boas making tense whooping sounds and writhing around on a living room stripper pole with really bad music playing in the background. I've already made it sound way more titillating than it actually is. You go girl.

You know, I like the "my identity doesn't stop at being a mom" thing, but so much of this hot mama, MILF-y, stripper-pole, sex-toy-party, desperate housewives, naughty mommy extravaganza is Just. Trying. Too. Hard. Why worry about proving your hotness to anyone? It's unsexy to be constantly screaming "Look at me! Babies came out of me but I'm still sexy!" Pole dancing = fine, whatevs, who cares; pole dancing on the Today Show = I'm over it. Moms can be libidinous and attractive but we do not have to flash our tits like Girls Gone Wild to demonstrate it. Unless, of course, we're nursing.

Gawker Outs McGreevey's Custody Notes

Rachael Brownell (Redsy) — Sat, 21 Apr 2007 18:12:00 GMT

Ex-New Jersey Governor James McGreevey, who resigned two years into his term after admitting a homosexual affair with a male staffer, is in the midst of a custody battle over 5-year old daughter, Jacqueline. In a note to the court called out in Gawker, soon-to-be-ex Dana McGreevey objects to Jacqueline sleeping in bed with McGreevey and his gay lover. She takes issue with the child sleeping with a non-parent in bed.

I grant her point and her concerns seem valid, even though the inherent homophobia and contempt are barely disguised. Family beds are problematic, especially when there are memoirs to be written, and custody battles to be fought. The complexity of our world grows deeper with each turn of the sexual screw. Proceed with caution, friends.

[Photo Credit: Gawker]