Strollerderby : New Jersey

No Hugs For You At Some High Schools

Brett Singer — Fri, 29 May 2009 16:30:00 GMT

According to this New York Times article, hugging is very popular among high school students. A video on the site mentions Hug High School, and calls teenage hugging a "sociological phenomenon." (Hey, whatever floats your sociological boat.)

But at some schools, the big bad grown-ups decided that enough is enough. The Times tells us that "schools from Hillsdale, N.J., to Bend, Ore., wary in a litigious era about sexual harassment or improper touching — or citing hallway clogging and late arrivals to class — have banned hugging or imposed a three-second rule."

First of all, a quick personal note. I'm not that young and when I was in high school boys and girls kissed each other hello. Boys tended to slap hands, either as a high-five or as a slap-into-handshake. I don't remember boys hugging, but boys and girls did, and girls hugged other girls. So I'm not so sure that this "phenomenon" is terribly significant.

Now, back to the issue at hand. If the kids are hanging all over each other in the halls, that could be problematic I suppose. But the problem isn't the hugging, it's that they're standing in the halls. The three-second rule is nuts and won't work. At summer camp, I remember a "6 inches rule" (which now that I type it, sounds vaguely pornographic). Boys and girls had to be that distance from each other at all times. The rule was even enforced by some (though not all) couselors and especially the camp owners, who felt very strongly that the sexes should remain at opposite sides of the room at all times. Because as we all know, closeness leads to touching, and touching leads to... well, you know. More touching.

My children aren't old enough yet but I don't think I would be in favor of a "no hugs" rule. What would be better is teaching kids about boundaries and personal space. Maybe someone doesn't want to be hugged. Maybe it makes them uncomfortable. Maybe you need to stop hugging and get to math class already. I don't know what the answer is, but I do know that if you tell a teenager not to do something, especially something that seems to be very much a part of their daily lives, all you're going to do is make them want to do it more.

What do you think? Is banning hugs a good idea? Or should the grown-ups just, well, grow up?

Source: New York Times

Brett Singer is the editor-in-chief of DaddyTips.com. You can follow his tweets at Twitter.com/brettsinger.

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New Jersey Woman Tweeting While Giving Birth

Brett Singer — Fri, 01 May 2009 15:00:00 GMT

Melissa Skabich of Cedar Grove, New Jersey is 39 weeks pregnant. She is being induced today due to high blood pressure. You can read more about it on her blog. You can also follow the delivery process live via Twitter. So, what's for dinner? I was thinking hamburgers, but I guess we had that once already...

Wait, what?

Yes, Melissa will be tweeting. Not before. Not after. DURING. DELIVERY.

My initial reaction is summed up by this commenter at NJ.com: "Worry about giving birth to your child, not tweeting. You twit." I would have left out the "twit" part, but I understand the frustration.

On the other hand, what's the harm? If she's into it, that's cool, right?

Mostly it seems like an unnecessary distraction. Isn't being in labor difficult enough without being concerned about tweeting? I'm also wondering if her doctor will tell her to put the darn Blackberry away and focus on pushing. This is her third kid, so I guess she knows what she's doing.

What do you think? Would you tweet while giving birth? Or is this just plain silly?

You can follow Melissa on Twitter at twitter.com/mommyblogger76.

Source: NJ.com

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Parents Ripped Off On Inauguration Trip?

Brett Singer — Tue, 27 Jan 2009 23:00:00 GMT

It wasn't all fun and games (and hope – let's not forget hope) at the Inauguration of Barack Obama on January 20, 2009.

Congressional Youth Leadership Council organized trips to our nation's capitol for 15,000 students at a rate of $2500 for five-days. 1,000 of those students were from New Jersey, and some of their parents are mighty peeved that their young'uns didn't get a good view of all the Obama-mania.

According to New Jersey's Daily Record, parents are claiming that the students missed out on "many of the historic events," including the swearing-in ceremony. That was kind of a big one. I mean, if you had miss something, that wouldn't be my choice.

The company says that most of the attendees had "a positive experience." Whenever I hear that line, I always have to wonder if that means they just didn't complain.

For now, this all falls under the category of "allegedly." New Jersey's Consumer Affairs Division is investigating.

If the kids did miss the ceremony, it might not have been the company's fault. The New York Times reports that a lot of ticket holders were " abandoned by event organizers as they stood crowded, frustrated and cold in what some referred to as the Purple Tunnel of Doom," thus missing the chance to see Chief Justice Roberts show that he has difficulty reading. (Kidding. Sort of.) The name "Purple Tunnel of Doom" is a bit dramatic (ya think?) but I'd be annoyed too if I came to D.C. to see history being made and ended up standing in a tunnel. (I don't think I'd start a Facebook group, though.)

Maybe four years from now they'll just hit the Lego Inauguration. Cheaper, and probably smaller crowds.

Source: Daily Record

Image: foreignpolicy.com

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Hitler Mom Wants Her Kids Back

Brett Singer — Tue, 27 Jan 2009 16:45:00 GMT

You know, with a story like this one, you want to give it a somewhat serious treatment. But it's difficult to avoid using "Hitler Kid" and "Hitler Mom", especially when that's what every news outlet leads with. So I'm a sheep. Sorry.

Anyway, the mother of Adolf Hitler Campbell, JoyceLynn Aryan Nation Campbell and Honszlynn Hinler Jeannie Campbell is defying a judge's order and speaking out about having her children removed by Family Services.

We have a few more details now. A neighbor called Family Services, claiming that the kids were being abused physically, mentally, and emotionally. Proud parents Deborah and Heath Campbell deny it all. They say that they are "not racists," and that they have the right to give their children whatever names they like. The Daily News had the best quote of all: "The parents insist they're not racists and want only to honor the heritage of the Third Reich." Right. It's that whole "trains running on time" thing. That's all they want to remember. Must be railroad enthusiasts. What's the problem?

All kidding aside, I do still have some misgivings here. If the only abuse was the names and the fact that the parents are racists, is that enough of a reason to remove the children from the home? If it is, aren't there a lot of other kids that should also be removed?

On a side note, could the article on MyFoxSpringfield have any more misspellings? Sheesh.

Source: Fox (1, 2)

Image: NY Daily News

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Kid Named Hitler Taken From His Parents By Family Services

Brett Singer — Wed, 14 Jan 2009 16:30:00 GMT

I bet you thought we'd never hear any news about this family again. Or maybe you just hoped you'd never hear from them again. Or maybe that was me. I get us confused sometimes.

Anyway, for reasons that are not being disclosed at this time, 3-year-old Adolf Hitler Campbell was removed from his home by the New Jersey Division of Youth and Family Services. Adolf's sisters, 1-year-old JoyceLynn Aryan Nation Campbell, and the comparatively normal-named 8-month-old Honszlynn Hinler Jeannie Campbell, were also removed by authorities.

As far as I know, it's unusual for Family Services not to give a reason to the public when kids are taken from their parents. According to the Daily News, "Holland Township police chief David Van Gilson told the site they had not received any reports of abuse or negligence." Which makes this even stranger.

In case you've forgotten, the Campbells' received some fame in December when a store refused to make a cake for little Adolf Hitler. At the time, the father, Heath Campbell, said, "They're just names, you know. Yeah, they (the Nazis) were bad people back then. But my kids are little. They're not going to grow up like that."

The swastikas that decorate the Campbell home, and the fact that they are reported Holocaust deniers, tells a different story. (Post-racial America? Um, I don't think so.)

We don't know the details yet, but the parents were scheduled to attend a hearing on Tuesday to discuss their children which "was apparently postponed", according to the News. So something is definitely going on.

That said, I’m not sure if being a Nazi lunatic is illegal. If it were, wouldn't Hutton (Mel's dad) Gibson be in jail?

UPDATE: Here is a video report via Yahoo! News. Listen to the reporter say the kids' names.

Source: NY Daily News

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Infant Twins Safe After Newark Carjacking

Brett Singer — Thu, 11 Dec 2008 16:30:00 GMT

This is one of those nightmare stories that ends well.

A woman in Newark, New Jersey was pulling out of her driveway. She got out of her car, a 2007 Hyundai SUV, to close the gate. A carjacker jumped into the vehicle and drove off. Big problem: her 10-month-old twins were in the back seat.

I guess the thief noticed that and freaked – less than a half an hour later, the vehicle was found around the corner. The car thief, they haven't found yet.

And people wonder why I don't have a driver's license… (Actually, this isn't why. Bad joke. Sorry.)

Who says there's no honor among thieves? Even if was just a fear of stinky diapers and not honor, at least the kids appear to be fine. And maybe this person will think twice before jacking another car.

Source: 1010wins.com
Image: nj.greateststateever.com

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JeanneSager — Thu, 20 Nov 2008 19:02:00 GMT

Remember when your parents’ friends peppered you with questions about school and you’d just had enough? When they asked what your favorite subject was, you finally shot them the smart-aleck answer, “recess.” Turn to 2008, and the No Child Left Untested Behind Act has slowly gotten its hooks into every kid’s favorite time of the school day. Recess is disappearing, but a set of New Jersey parents are fighting back.

Residents of Howell, N.J., have convinced the state’s assembly to put together a task force that will study whether a law is in order to protect a twenty-minute recess period in the school day. Their research shows only eight states have a mandate that kids get a free period at some point during the day; although New Jersey’s education department says it’s more common for schools to have recess than not - even without the mandate.

In light of Sunny’s post earlier this week about educators worried that the loss of playtime for kids is stealing their imaginations (and with it their ability to create and be innovative), shouldn’t states be more willing to make recess mandatory? ’ve heard arguments from teachers that there just isn’t enough time in the day for teaching, and they’d know better than I. But there is a point where kids brains become saturated, and they need a little time to relax. Lunchtime, with the regimented march to the cafeteria, the line-up to pay for hot lunch and the monitor watching their every bite and chew, doesn’t give a kid time to shake their sillies out. Some kids come back from recess rambunctious, but I’d bet it’s nothing compared to the sheer energy level zipping around their little bodies BEFORE the recess bell rings.

And what of the playground politics? The rites of passage? Even the bullying and cliques that - as parents - we’d like to see disappear are learning tools for our kids on their path to adulthood. I applaud the parents of Howell and the Trenton legislators for agreeing to take a look-see at protecting Red Rover, Red Rover and hopscotch.

Maybe they can all get together to celebrate with a game of kickball.

Image: Amazon

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Mrs. Robinson Alive and Living in Jersey

JeanneSager — Wed, 05 Nov 2008 15:59:00 GMT

Josette Taylor claimed the MILF title in her New Jersey neighborhood this week. The fifty-three-year-old mom admitted to having sex with her one of her son's buddies. But that's not where this momma went off the train tracks.

The boy was just fifteen. At least Benjamin Braddock was out of college and able to drink before Mrs. Robinson showed him there's even more to life than plastics. A mother of two (her son is sixteen, her daughter twenty), Taylor was apparently a walking cliche. Her husband? A doctor. Her home? A mansion worth well over one million dollars.

Now the bored Jersey broad's facing up to five years in prison for sexual assault. As well as some looks of embarrassment and disgust from her kids.

Koo-koo-ka-choo.

Source: Newark Star Ledger

Image: Amazon

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New Jersey Lays Down the Law: Vaccinate All Kids Against the Flu

JeanneSager — Sat, 18 Oct 2008 18:36:00 GMT

I should probably preface this with a bit of a disclaimer: I'm a pro-vaccine parent, particularly the flu shot. But I still think the ultimate choice for vaccinating my child should rest with me. Which is why I'm glad I live an hour outside of New Jersey.

Parents were storming the statehouse in Trenton this week, protesting a new law that mandates children between the ages of 6 months and 5 years be vaccinated against the flu. Mandated. As in, made law.

It's the first law of its kind in the country - although plenty of other states have rules regarding medical interventions and our kids. I had no reason to protest the Vitamin K shot administered when my daughter was born, but then again, I wouldn't have been able to. I live in New York, one of a number of states that requires babies be given the injection right in the hospital, shortly after birth.

New Jersey's new law, which technically states children (under 5 and over 6 months) who attend daycare or preschool need to be vaccinated against the flu and pneumonia by Dec. 31, comes as we enter the first flu season for which the CDC has advocated all children (not just those under 5) be vaccinated. Advocated. Not mandated.

The flu shot has a lot going for it, don't get me wrong. The flu sends 200,000 Americans to the hospital every year, 20,000 of them children under 5. It kills 36,000 Americans, including people who die from a secondary illness due to an immune system weakened by the flu. It's a disease that spreads easily and can hit anyone. It's a shot I'm going to get, my husband is going to get and our daughter is going to get.

But I've seen nothing in all the news reports - even those that have come out in support of the new mandate - to explain how parents are supposed to pay for this. And I'm still leery of letting the step in at surface level to tell us how to parent. When a child is in clear danger, yes. When a child might or might not get a disease that might or might not make them seriously ill and might or might not be avoided by a shot, I wouldn't call it a clear and present danger. Are parents who don't get the shot playing with fire? Personally, yes, I think so. But I don't think there's enough evidence to show that the state stepping in on this one will make a difference in a child's life.

Image: Health News-Stat

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School Board Member Uses Gay Slur, Says Student Said it First

JeanneSager — Sun, 12 Oct 2008 16:18:00 GMT

He's stepping down from his post as a member of the board of education in Robbinsville, NJ, but maybe Joe Armenti would be better suited back in high school? The board has been facing pressures from an outraged public since Armenti used the word "faggot" in response to a teenager's presentation to the board on a ban on the use of offensive language.

His initial excuse? The teen said it first. Excuse me, who's the teenager here?

Joseph Armenti's exact words, according to the Times of Trenton were, ""If my son wants to call somebody a faggot he should be allowed to; it's his First Amendment right." In other words - he's protecting his son's right to be a bigot and a homophobe. What a stand-up Dad. It was a response to a presentation by a student who was advocating the school district begin a program to report using offensive language via a "suggestion box." Students who used inappropriate words would then be approached by a counselor to discuss the situation. The student presenting the idea to the board used the word "faggot" as an example of language that would fall under the program.

What's disturbing isn't that Armenti used the word. In fact, as a reporter who depends on the right to freedom of speech in this country to make a living, I wouldn't step in to tell an adult what he can or can't say - even if I don't agree with him. To paraphrase Hamlet, "words, words, words," are what you make of them. But for a school board member to promote kids' "right" to spew hate toward one another is disturbing. And that's what Armenti was doing when he chose the word "faggot" rather than "s**t" or "f**k" or any of dozens of words deemed offensive by some but not down-right prejudiced and hate-filled.

That this came from the mouth of someone at the top level in a school system makes this story that much more disturbing. If this is what they're feeling at the top, what's trickling down to the kids? When the board meets later in the month to accept his resignation, I'd suggest Armenti spend a day in a classroom, maybe follow around one of the members of the Robbinsville High School's Gay-Straight Alliance. He could see just who he's protecting his son to insult.

Image: PinkNews

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Mom leaves kids in a Jersey parking lot

Brett Singer — Mon, 15 Sep 2008 12:30:00 GMT

This is about as messed up a story as you'll read all week (hopefully).

A woman left her children – a 2 year old and a 7 month old – in a taxi at 2:30am Sunday morning. She went into a Wawa convenience store (Wawa!) in North Brunswick, NJ, telling the driver she would be right back. Then she drove off with two guys she met inside the store. At 5am – yes, two and a half hours later – the driver called the police. They were "unharmed" – physically, at least.

We don't know who the woman is, but police do -- "Authorities have been in contact with the mother, who left identification in the taxi cab, police said. She is believed to be from North Jersey, but her identity was not immediately released Sunday."

Is there any explanation that would make this OK? I can't think of one.

Source: mycentraljersey.com

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No dinero for Dina

Brett Singer — Mon, 11 Aug 2008 13:00:00 GMT

What do you call a couple that spent $1 million on lawyers while getting divorced, and the result was that the wife got $100,000, plus $1,075 a month in child support?

You would call them the McGreeveys. (Well, not anymore, they're divorced.)

Yes, Mr. "I Am A Gay American" and the former first lady of the Garden State are finished with their contentious divorce proceeding. NYMag describes the courtroom drama as, "incredibly public, ugly, and drawn-out," which is kind of true, although it didn't quite have the legs of the Christie Brinkley / Peter "19 is legal, dammit!" Cook case.

What's fascinating to me is that Dina is getting almost nothing. She gets a one-time payment of $109,295 from Jimbo, which is half of their shared investments, so it kind of doesn't count in my book. $1,075 a month in child support is, if I may be so bold, bupkis.

So why no dinero for Dina? Jim don’t have no money. NYMag says, "since McGreevey argued that he only makes $48,000 per year while he is in seminary, the judge ruled him 'underemployed.'" So he's studying to be a priest. I guess his book didn't sell as well as people had hoped. Jim is living with a "super-wealthy financier" but those assets don't factor in. ("Jim's in love with a Jersey boy..." OK, don't go there.)

Judge Karen M. Cassidy said that both Jim and Dina, "clearly had agendas," and "their anger seemed to override any ability to testify credibly or to be reasonable." At least she went after both of them, unlike the judge in the YouTube cuckoo-wife case.

I have to wonder how angry you have to be at your spouse to spend $500,000 on attorney's fees - each - when you must have known that there was no pot of gold at the end of the divorce rainbow. Sure, Dina was married to a guy that was sleeping with, well, another guy, so she's mad. And Jim… well, he's mad at her for something, I guess. According to the New York Post, the couple will do some swapping of 401k plans and other relatively minor assets, like a $1500 checking account. She was only asking for $2500/month. So how do you rack up half a mil worth of legal bills? Fuzzy math, at best. They have a daughter together; hopefully they'll be able to deal with each other somewhat civilly.

image/source: NYMag

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No, Seriously: School in Lockdown After 'Ninja' Sighting

Madeline Holler — Thu, 07 Aug 2008 23:02:00 GMT

Errrrrr. Embarrassing? A Barnegat, N.J., school shut down part of Wednesday after someone reported seeing a ninja running through the woods behind the school.

Fearing for the safety of themselves, the children and anybody appearing to descend from the ruling class of 15th Century feudal Japan, school administrators issued an immediate lockdown of the school and phoned authorities. No word on whether the local dojo was called.

Turns out, the "ninja" was actually a camp counselor in a black karate uniform armed with nothing more than a plastic sword. Haaaaaiiiiiiiya! The counselor was running late to a costume-themed day at a nearby middle school, according to the local police.

The lockdown was issued that morning and lasted for 30 minutes.

Photo: Huffington Post

Topless Barbie Leads to Man's Arrest

Jen Chaney — Mon, 14 Jul 2008 12:34:00 GMT

"The only regret I do have is probably having the Barbie doll up on the dash board. Being topless, maybe that drew some attention."

Those are the words of Robert Martin, a New Jersey man arrested last week for displaying a topless Barbie doll, pornographic magazines and other salacious materials inside his car, which was parked at a rest stop off the Garden State Parkway.

In addition to half-naked children's toys, Martin's car also contained explicit DVD cases, a Bible, a cross and, weirdest of all, a thong on a golden serving platter. You know, the usual stuff you set on the seat of your Honda Civic before heading to work in the morning.

Martin was charged with maintaining a public nuisance and, after police found a pointed shank in the car, possession of a weapon. But the guy, who was released on bail, has an explanation for all of it.

The shank?

He uses that to to pop tapes out of the cassette player.

The porn, naked Barnie and thong on a platter?

He was keeping it in his car because he's in the process of moving to a new apartment. (Um, ok-ayyy....)

"I didn't think that possessing porn inside your car, in the back seat, was a public display," Martin told NBC10. "It was not on public display, it was not a public shrine."

To be fair, most people probably wouldn't know that either. Then again, most people probably don't keep porn in their cars. And if for freaky reason they felt like it was necessary to do that -- you know, because of a big move -- they'd keep it in that new-fangled, high-tech thing ... shoot, what do they call that? Oh yeah. THE TRUNK.

My real concern in this whole situation is poor Barbie, who was essentially abused. I sincerely hope someone has arranged for that doll to seek solid therapy from Psychologist Skipper.

Image: CBS3.com

Baby born in mid-air

Brett Singer — Mon, 09 Jun 2008 14:00:00 GMT

Next time I'm on a plane and there's a baby crying, I'll try to think that it could be worse. I could be sitting next to an actual birth.

That's what happened on a Korean Air Lines flight the other day. En route to the Philippines from New York City, Jacel Brown suddenly went into labor and gave birth to a baby boy, Jadan. The father delivered his own son, with an assist from a surgeon who happened to be on board (handy!). Before you say, "Why was she flying when she was so close to giving birth?" I need to point out that she wasn't all that close at all – it was her seventh month, so the little guy was premature. He weighed less than 3 pounds, and is currently at Lourdes Medical Center in New Jersey, where the couple is from.

That must've been some in-flight meal -- it caused her to give birth! (Ba-dum-bum.) Here's hoping baby, mother, father, and even the surgeon, are doing OK.

image: WCBS TV

“Santa Claus” Pedophile Caught in New Jersey

Cole Gamble — Fri, 09 May 2008 19:01:00 GMT

A man know for playing Santa Claus and painting children's faces was arrested Thursday for pedophilia after an international manhunt.

Wayne Nelson Corliss, 58, is charged with producing child pornography. If convicted he faces 10 to 20 years in prison.

Colleagues of Corliss described him as a “witty” and “amiable” man. Because Corliss was connected to a child pornography investigation in Canada, this case marked only the second time Interpol has launched a public manhunt for a suspected pedophile.

I knew there was a reason those mall Santas creeped me out. Makes Bad Santa look pretty good in comparison.

Detention Double Standard

Brett Singer — Mon, 03 Mar 2008 18:30:00 GMT

Following up on PennyGate, it's worth noting that this sort of bizarro school discipline has happened before: in November of last year, Megan Coulter was given two days of detention for the henious crime of hugging. While Megan actually served her time, our commenter Tracey points out that the Penny Gang got a reprieve. The incident has also been downgraded from a "protest" to a "prank" according to the school Superintendent Jorden Schiff. Interesting side note: in 1995, Schiff was one of the youngest people ever to become a high school principal in New Jersey, at age 28.

Here's the best quote of the whole thing: Schiff says that the kids will serve the detentions "if parents ask that their children serve them." Next time I take a flight, I'm going to ask to fly the plane. Hey, why not?

image: merchbot

8th Graders Get Detention for Paying with Pennies

Brett Singer — Sun, 02 Mar 2008 14:02:00 GMT

Not sure what to make of this one: a group of 29 eighth-grade students at Readington Middle School in New Jersey will have to serve detention (one hour of silence, after school) for paying for their lunch with pennies. Apparently the lunch period had been shortened and paying with pieces of copper was the kids' method of protest. The school said that they weren't punishing the protest; they were responding to the "lack of respect" the students showed to the lunchroom staff, who apparently spent so much time counting the coins (200 per kid), they were unable to serve tuna mushroom casserole to everyone. (The tuna mushroom casserole part is made up, but that was always the most disgusting thing at my school cafeteria. I actually ran for student body president on a "eliminate tuna mushroom casserole" platform. But I digress.)

The comments are, as is often the case on sites other than this one where we have the greatest commenters on the planet, as revealing as they are bizarre. Some examples:

the kids that dreamed this up should all be given a free lunch and an “A” for creativity. Instead the school is about to smother their creativity!
All the stuff about being a bully, this is it! The principal is being a bully to 14 yer olds. Parents have not only the right, but the absolute responsibility to intervene on this.
Kids are Kids, get over it.....
Instead of the administration doing something responsible, like taking the 29 kids and discussing why the Lunch period has to be short on snow days, I.E. State regs, They use their "power" to come up with a trumped charge of "disrespecting" lunch aides to discipline them. They (principal) needs to grow up. ... Are you running a prison? or a school?

Looks like the parents are hopping mad, or at least some of them are: according to the article, it was parents who alerted the media to the story, which received national coverage.

What do you think? Does the punishment fit the crime?

UPDATE: Make sure to read Kelly Mills post about a girl who was punished after stopping a bus full of schoolkids from crashing into traffic. Yowch.

image: merchbot

Bonus video: for no particular reason, here is a clip from Whose Line Is It Anyway, featuring a bit called "Songs of the Lunch Lady."

Teen-Led Sex Ed Gives Parents the Willies

Karen Murphy — Mon, 18 Feb 2008 12:31:00 GMT

Remember your first time? Everybody does. Mine happened in 9th grade, and it involved an older man. There was weeks of anticipation leading up to the event, and when it finally happened there was a bit of disappointment: is that all there is?

Sex ed. (What did you think I meant?) Mr. Bortz, normally the composed Bio teacher good at frog dissection, was red-faced for the entire three weeks and stammered through the curriculum, uttering words like "urethra" and "Fallopian tube". I would much rather have had what some New Jersey kids are getting, a peer-to-peer sex ed course. Too bad some parents feel otherwise.

The comprehensive course, called Teen PEP, is required material addressing topics of abstinence, safe sex, dating violence, HIV-AIDS, and how alcohol and drugs affect sexual decision-making. (Mr. Bortz could have talked about some of that, might have made a difference.) It's given to ninth-graders by faculty-supervised juniors and seniors. So what's the problem? I would much rather have been taught by another kid than an embarrassed teacher.

But some parents are pulling their kids out of the program, saying they don't want them being taught how to put condoms on bananas by other kids. But who else is going to teach you the important life skill of putting a condom onto a banana?

Photo: www.superweb.de

Mixed Messages On Mercury

Amy S.F. Lutz — Fri, 11 Jan 2008 13:31:00 GMT

Last month, two states passed two very different laws involving mercury. Minnesota became the first state in the country to ban the use of mercury in all cosmetics - even those that conform to federal mercury standards. New Jersey also had groundbreaking legislation - only what that new law mandated was the injection of mercury into each and every preschooler in the state.

The flu shot is the last vaccine that still uses thimerosol, a mercury based preservative. On December 14, the New Jersey State Health Commissioner approved a measure requiring preschoolers to get a flu shot every year. Although there are thimerosol-free versions of the flu vaccine, those generally have to be special ordered, so children whose parents don't specifically ensure otherwise will be dosed with mercury on an annual basis. And mercury accumulates in the body over time, so even though the amount in each shot is small, it will add up over time.

Mercury is a toxin that's been implicated in the development of Alzheimer's disease, and more recently, autism. And even if you think the whole autism - thimerosol theory is a lot of hooha, it's still relevant to note that mercury is so poisonous that Minnesotans don't want it in their mascara. As Minnesotan state senator John Marty, who sponsored the bill, noted, "Mercury does cause neurological damage to people even in tiny quantities . . . Every source of mercury adds to it. We wanted to make sure it wasn't here."

Couple Boards Train and Takes Luggage; Leaves Baby Behind

Karen Murphy — Mon, 31 Dec 2007 19:31:00 GMT

I'd love to be snarky about this, but honestly, I can totally see it happening: you're boarding a train at a busy station, eager to get away from the in-laws after being threatened with never having sex again if you don't go this year without complaining, and you've got the luggage and the tickets, and hello, is there a bar car on this train? and the baby in the stroller, and people are getting on are we going to miss the train? Did you get the bag with all the baby's stuff in it? Okay, I'll get the heavy one and you get that stupid box with the crystal in it that your Uncle Ed insisted on giving us NOW instead of, you know, shipping it, and there's all our bags, count them one, two, three, four, and the box-with-the-crystal, and the baby's bag, and the—OH SHIT! You got the baby, didn't you? I thought you had the baby! You thought I had the baby??! WHERE'S THE BABY???!

So I forget stuff like my keys all the time. I forgot to buckle my son's seat belt once when coming home from taking his two-day-old jaundiced dehydrated sister to the doctor. I forget what people told me, what I said, what I ate last week or sometimes yesterday. So even though a part of me wants to be all judgy like HOW COULD YOU FORGET YOUR FREAKING BABY??, there's another part that totally understands, and both parts are just really really glad nothing bad happened.

So the baby was left strapped into his stroller at a new Brunswick New Jersey train station when both parents boarded thinking the other was getting the baby. Yeah, yeah, total lack of communication (likely they haven't spoken ever since she got pregnant and he saw his life flash before his eyes), but as the train pulled out of the station at least they had the presence of mind to go OH SHIT and tell the conductor who was able to notify police, who then kept an eye on the baby until Dad (clearly never having sex again at this point) could hop off the train at the first stop and take a cab back to the station while Mom silently stewed in her seat all the way home.

End of story, except they'll forever be known as The Couple That Left The Baby Behind.

Photos: commons.wikimedia.org

Christmas Thieves Turn Out To Be Kinder-Garden Staters

makeitadouble — Mon, 31 Dec 2007 13:30:00 GMT

How many times have you seen this scenario on television or in the movies? A private detective/nosy neighbor/group of meddling kids needs to get into a penthouse apartment/detached garage/office of a bankrupt amusement park owner but when he/she/they try the door it’s locked. Instead of giving up and letting the case/gossip/mystery go uninvestigated a credit card is confidently pulled from a wallet and inserted into the space between the door frame and lock. A wiggle, a jiggle, and "click" the door pops open.

Hollywood makes the art of picking a lock with a plastic laminated card look so easy, but tell that to the Blockbuster Video Card I mangled unsuccessfully trying to retrieve my filched stapler from the locked office of my company nemesis. Is there anyone out there excluding members of the Screen Actors Guild who can actually jimmy a door open with a credit card; anyone besides children from New Jersey I mean?

On Christmas Eve in South Brunswick, NJ a 9-year-old girl and a 5-year-old boy used a gift card to pick the lock on the back door of a home and made off with around $200 of gifts; including Hannah Montana and Jonas Brothers CDs. My 5-year old has been known to get trapped in bathrooms where the locks are on the inside, so I’m left to wonder where these Kinder-Garden Staters learned this lock picking technique. My guess is that it must part of the educational curriculum included in the same unit they teach how to have an uncompromising love of Bon Jovi and Bruce Springsteen, cool terms like Bennies and Shoobies to insult out-of-staters and how to answer the question, “What town do you live in?” with an exit off the Parkway.

The rapscallions were only caught when one of their relatives for some reason spoke to the burglarized couple and discovered the stolen items matched the unexplained presents the children had received on Christmas. Maybe it’s just me but unexplained gifts on Christmas morning would be reason enough for me to start asking a few questions.

“Did you buy the Jonas Brothers CD?”
“No, I thought you did!”
“Me? Who the Hell are the Jonas Brothers? Hold on…where’s my wallet? Alright, something’s not right about this. You call the police and I’ll go randomly talk to neighbors.”

The gifts were returned to the couple and no charges are going to be filed against Bonnie and Cried, but an ironic detail of the case was that the amount on the gift card the kids used to pick the lock was equal to the estimated value of the gifts they stole. Not really, but that's the way it would have played out if Hollywood had anything to do with it.

New Jersey School Officials Caught With Hands in the Till

Patti — Wed, 21 Mar 2007 00:17:00 GMT

The public school district in Camden, NJ has a rule that children must not be required to pay for educational field trips. So when parents came to the school board complaining that their children were being left behind when they couldn't afford the fees for the trips, an investigation was launched. Yesterday, former principal Michael Hailey and his aide, Patricia Johnson, were indicted for having embezzled over $14,000 in fees they'd collected for field trips from students, parents, fundraisers, and the pockets of teachers. Along with another former principal and a teacher, Hailey and Johnson were also indicted for overbilling the school district by over $25,000 for meetings which never actually took place.

According to census data, Camden is the poorest city in the USA with a median income of only $18,000. The parents want their money back.

Ex NJ Gov McGreevey Battles for Custody

Rachael Brownell (Redsy) — Thu, 15 Mar 2007 22:56:00 GMT

Former Governor of New Jersey, James McGreevey, has filed for sole custody of his five year old daughter Jacqueline and child support from his ex-wife, Matos McGreevey. James McGreevey, who resigned after two years in office, admitting a homosexual affair with a male staffer, is the only openly gay governor in U.S. history. During his tenure as NJ governor, he battled a $5 billion deficit and eventually raised cigarrette taxes to attempt to address the issue.

His successor, Richard Codey took office upon McGreevey's resignation and served out the remaining two years of his term. Since resigning the governorship McGreevey has spoken out about being a gay politician. He penned a book aptly called The Confessional that came out last Fall.

Child custody matters are difficult enough without extra attention paid to sexual orientation thrown into the mix. Apparently, McGreevey's ex- claims he's an unfit parent largely due to his "lifestyle." I feel sorry for the guy.

Destroying Cheap Toys for the Sake of Education

Sarah, Goon Squad Sarah — Thu, 01 Mar 2007 18:07:00 GMT

If taking apart your toys teaches kids engineering I should have had an honorary degree from MIT in Mechanical Engineering by the time I was eight. My childhood nickname was "Destructo".

Fortunately, teachers in New Jersey have figured out a way to make taking cheap toys apart educational. The kids are encouraged to take apart toys from happy meals or the dollar store to learn about gears and how things work. Dave Janosz calls his class Innovations and Inventions and the student's seem to love it.

Well, the male students seem to love it. Did you guys know that girls don't take tech classes? Apparently girls only account for about 10% of the students enrolled in technical classes at the high school level in the U.S. right now. I find this pretty surprising considering how much the number of women studying engineering in American colleges has grown in the last ten years.

Either way, this sounds like a really cool class. I mean - who wouldn't love a class where you get to take things apart? I think we, as parents, should encourage our sons and our daughters to get more interested in how things work. I know most of us plan on enrolling our kids in the college prep courses, but there is nothing wrong with taking some technical electives, especially if it leads to an engineering degree down the road.