Strollerderby : Rebel Dad

College Student Admits Ignorance; Parents Rejoice

Mike Adamick (Cry It Out!) — Tue, 24 Apr 2007 17:22:00 GMT

Remember the college student who said stay-at-home dads have it easy? That at-home dads might as well wax their surfboards and hit the beach, for all the fun they're gonna have in the Land of Domesticity?

Well, he's back. With his tail between his legs. Nicely. Rebeldad got a nice note from the young man the other day, explaining that he was just poking a little fun -- trying to bring some light-hearted humor to all the students mixed up in the icky business of finals and what not. What he encountered instead was a torch-bearing, angry parental mob led fronted by yours truly.

Believe me, I know a thing or two about jokes falling on their face. I still get emails about this one (even though I'll defend to the end the idea that "Saturday Night Live" will never be considered "earnest" and also that some people are uptight morons).

It seems that sometimes you give someone a kid and they give you back their sense of humor. If that's the case, I'm wondering now if this poor, young college columnist might put off parenthood longer than he expected ....

At-Home Dads Have It Way. Too. Easy.

Mike Adamick (Cry It Out!) — Thu, 12 Apr 2007 13:28:00 GMT

I'm totally going about this stay-at-home dad business the wrong way. Apparently instead of shopping for dinner and cleaning the kitchen and quelling tantrums and mastering that $#@! sippy cup and passing on language and praying to dear lord sweet jebus for nap time, I should be watching as many sports programs (matches? meets?) as possible, finding new hobbies, like surfing and building rocking chairs, and not worrying about "wasting" that college degree.

Uh huh.

This particular vision of the at-home parenting lifestyle is by a Stanford college student who penned a column -- "It's sad we don't consider becoming a SAHD" -- about all the glories and free time at-home dads have suddenly wandered into.

I'm not going to rip apart this poor, deluded lad -- despite the gravy boat of opportunities:

"Aren’t you going to be bored staying at home all day? Not when you have more hobbies than a ten-year old. I will definitely need to live by the ocean so I can surf and have a garage where I can watch “The New Yankee Workshop” on PBS and make cool furniture with fancy tools. I’ll sing lullabies on my guitar and take lots of pictures while practicing my black-and-white photography skills. Then there are the things I still want to learn: chess, French and car mechanics."

For starters, that's pretty funny -- and I think he was trying to be funny. I hope. But also because Rebel Dad has already linked to this particular story and at-home dads are ganging up on him like it's Dollar Day at Baby Legs. (The comments are the best part of the whole thing.) But the real reason I'm not going to rip him apart is because this particular vision is, sadly, shared by many.

I can't tell you how many single friends I have who think I've got it made -- and I do, to a degree, because I am watching my girl grow -- but wow, learning French? Going surfing? Being bored? Do people really think at-home dads shove their babies in a closet all day? Would they think the same about a mom?

At-Home Dad Numbers Soar -- Rock On, Pops

Mike Adamick (Cry It Out!) — Wed, 28 Mar 2007 11:09:00 GMT

When I tell people what I do with myself these days, I generally get two responses. "No, seriously, what do you really do?" is one of them. The other is a look of envy, followed by a cluck of the tongue and a wistful glance skyward. "Oh man, I wish."

More and more at-home dads could be facing this same conversational dichotomy. Rebel Dad points out new Census figures that show the number of at-home dads is rising -- from 147,000 in 2004 to 159,000 in 2005. (The Census is slooowwww with new figures, it seems.)

Sure, we take a good-natured ribbing every now and then. People just don't understand our deviant lifestyles, I suppose. But that's fine. It's worth it.

I never thought I would stay home with a kid. I was all about the career -- moving up, moving forward. Working. Working. Working. For a few weeks after I first began staying home, I wondered if I made the right decision. I was accustomed to a fast-moving lifestyle, deadlines and the camaraderie of a workplace -- even if we only talked about "Office Space" all day long.

But over the next few months, I found myself by her side when my daughter took her first steps. I saw her perform her first sign -- "bird," she said with her fingers. I even grew to enjoy changing her diaper -- when we sing songs and clap our hands. Sure, she can drive me batty sometimes, but she knows I'm there if she just needs to sit down for a bit and hug.

It's been about seven months now, maybe eight. I've lost count. But I can't think of anything else I'd rather do. I hope the growing ranks of at-home dad feel the same.