Strollerderby : babycenter

Today's Parents Minding Their (Kids') Manners More Than Ever

Kate Tuttle — Thu, 19 Mar 2009 15:03:00 GMT

From the BabyCenter folks (you know, the ones who send you emails every week or so with updates on how your child should be developing) comes a new survey about today's parents and their attitudes toward manners. Apparently, manners are back (though in some houses, naturally, they never really left). The BabyCenter poll released this week shows today's parents focusing on teaching their kids proper behavior for a variety of reasons; the top three are "to gives kids a moral compass" (64%), as a reaction against seeing "badly behaved kids" (58%), and to give kids a leg up in a "competitive" world (43%).

Manners are a way for people to show kindness and respect on in small ways, and just make the world feel nicer, if they really connect with something underneath -- but manners that are simply a series of rules and rituals with no underlying positive messages strike me as at best pointless, at worst kind of hypocritical. Which is why some of the BabyCenter responses rubbed me the wrong way. For instance, when 40% of parents say they want their kids to "treat adults with respect" but only 19% feel its important that their offspring "treat other children with respect," I have to scratch my head. What manners rulebook are they reading that says grownups are more valuable, more worthy of good treatment, than children? And if they really believe that, what does it say about how they're raising their own kids?

I grew up in a family that allowed kids to call (most) adults by their first names (a no-no for 40% of the BabyCenter poll respondants); really, though, the rule was that we were to call people what they wanted to be called -- for many if not most adults in our circle, that was a first name, but if someone was introduced as Ms. Smith or Professor Brown, that was the name we used until told otherwise. Flexibility, on this and other aspects of social behavior, seem much more useful to me than a strict set of rules.

That's why, for my kids anyway, I've tried to teach manners from the inside out -- I don't prompt them to say "please" and "thank you," but they see me saying it every day, to family members as well as strangers, and that has seemed to work. As for more complex etiquette questions, we focus on the content (that place where empathy and a sense of fairness overlap) rather than the form. I've spent enough time in the South, where a hotel clerk will "yes ma'am" you to death while completly ignoring your requests or concerns, to have much patience with empty, sugar-coated manners. (And when my younger brother was slapped across the face for refusing to call a teacher "Sir," I'm not sure what that really taught him -- other than to get out of South Carolina!) I don't want to raise kids who talk the talk but don't walk the walk, you know?

What manners issues are non-negotiable in your house, and how do you enforce them? Or do you take a gentler approach, and hope your kids will imitate the behavior you model? And what do you ask your children to call the adults in their lives?

Photo: Nina Leen for Life Magazine, 1959

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Baby Center Store Closing - FINAL DAY

Brett Singer — Tue, 06 Jan 2009 22:15:00 GMT

Pretty soon, parents won't be able to buy binkies, booster seats or bottles at the BabyCenter Store. Actually, they won't be able to buy anything at all – BabyCenter is closing their online store for good on January 6, 2009.

In other parenting-business news, a company called The Parent Company has filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy protection. The Parent Company trades on the NASDAQ under the cute-as-a-button symbol KIDS – or at least they will until January 7, 2009, when they will be de-listed. Among the companies owned by The Parent Company are eToys, BabyUniverse and ePregnancy. From their website: "The Parent Company provides comprehensive eCommerce and eContent resources to help families plan, play and grow." Because if there's one thing families need, it's more eContent resources.

What does all of this mean? Economically, I have no idea. (I managed to avoid Econ 101 in college.) But it is interesting that even Internet retailers are having trouble staying afloat. When brick and mortar stores (aka, "places you actually have to go to in order to buy stuff") go belly up, it's less surprising, since they have to pay, like, rent and stuff. The Interwebs were supposed to be a place where any nudnik with a dream and/or a nightmare could slap up a digital shingle and make millions in mere minutes.

It's not that simple, of course; just ask the web site that lost their shirts offering free shipping of pet food during the dotcom boom. Still, you would think that a site as popular as BabyCenter would want to keep their store alive in some form. Over on DaddyTips.com, I created an Amazon store in about five minutes. There's not a lot there, it's more of a storelet, but it works and I don't have to do anything. Granted, I'm not exactly rolling in dough from my efforts. But if I spent some time designing it, adding products, I might make a few bucks. I know BabyCenter probably liked offering their own eCommerce outlet for their users. But all that inventory, staff, shipping, it's all overhead even if there's no actual store to deal with.

Does this mean the business of parenting and/or the business of selling stuff to parents is on the decline? I doubt it. Parenting is big business. No matter what the state of the economy, if you have kids, they're going to need diapers. And food. And, if they're lucky, the occasional toy. Somebody has to sell it to us, right? Ah, but there are other places to get it. Amazon, of course, will sell you just about anything. (I believe that they will one day sell body parts. You heard it here first.) And The Parent Company isn't gone; they're just taking a little Chapter 11 break. And I'm not mentioning the hundreds of other places that want your money. So maybe BabyCenter wasn't making enough scratch with the store and got tired of competing. Who knows.

One good thing about BabyCenter going bye-bye: everything is on sale, big time. Like, it was $60 and now it's $17.99. That kind of sale. A real, honest to goodness "everything must go, we're selling to the bare, virtual walls" sale. You've got a couple more days, check it out here.

Sources: BabyCenter (also image), NY Times

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Booty Caller Texts When You're Ovulating

JeanneSager — Tue, 09 Dec 2008 17:57:00 GMT

Cervical mucus tests skeev you out? Me too. Don't worry, BabyCenter has stepped in to take the eww out of baby-making with ovulation text alerts sent straight to your cell phone.

The Booty Caller will send three messages your way every month to let you know when it's time to get a little . . . and when it's not.

The service is free (your wireless company's standard texting fees still apply), sponsored by First Response (who, wouldn't you know, make ovulation and pregnancy tests). BabyCenter's building off survey estimates that 19.3 million moms text as it makes the bid for a few more of their mobile minutes.

As one of those one-and-done Moms, I've got to say I can see the booty caller becoming Dad's worst enemy. Sorry honey - checked with my phone, and I'm too fertile for words. On the other hand, they do say you can enter his cell phone number into the mix too - so at least he can be prepared to be jumped when he walks in the door.

At the very least, it's cheaper than calling the psychic hotline again to find out when you're finally going to get that second baby.

Source: BabyCenter via YourTango

Image: First Response

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(Grey's) Anatomy of a Baby Naming Trend

Madeline Holler — Mon, 07 Jan 2008 23:04:00 GMT

What kind of embarrassing is it when you realize that you named your kid after a TV character? Because nobody does that on purpose, right? It’s TV. It’s fleeting. It’s getting canceled next season. Nobody actually says, “We’re naming her Olivia. We’re big fans of Law & Order SVU!”

So all you parents of an Addison under the age of 2, tell me: where’d you come up with that name? ABC Thursdays, 9 p.m./8 central? That’s what I thought, you Grey’s Anatomy automatons! Well, prepare yourselves for cast reunions at your weekly playgroups, because your Addison is going to be fighting over crayons with a lot of Baileys, Izzys (Izzies?), Callies and Jacksons.

The fastest rising baby names in 2007 have some kind of connection to Grey’s Anatomy and its stars, according to Baby Center. Let’s start with Addison, the name of a hot OB/Gyn who was spun off onto her own series Private Practice. She jumped 20 spots in the name rankings to land in the Top 10 names.

And Isobel, the character played by Katherine Heigl, moves an average of six spots a year since the show’s launch in 2005.

Bailey, the name of the no-nonsense doctor with a heart of gold, was the fastest rising, jumping 39 spots.

Callie, new to the Top 100 list, is, don’t you know, the name of Dr. Torres on the show.

Over in the land of boys, Jackson jumped 10 spots and is now in the Top 10. Who’s Jackson on the show? Well, this is where Baby Center’s arguments for the show’s influence gets tenuous.

They say: Actor Justin Chambers (who plays Dr. Alex Karev) has a daughter named Isabella and a son named Jackson.

You know, I’ve been in the baby name business for at least seven years now and let me tell you, I’ve met enough pre-2005 Jackson’s to fully staff a city hospital starting in the year 2020.

While I’m at it, there has always been at least one Isobel in every park too – though rather than Izzie, the pre-2005 nom de play of choice was always Bella.

So maybe Grey’s Anatomy isn’t as influential on names as the website argues. Maybe … maybe! … writers for Grey’s Anatomy’s pilot went to a kid's birthday party in 2002 and named the characters after the guests who brought the best presents.

Now, tell me. Why did you name your baby Isobel?

Move Over, Emma and Jacob: Make Way for New Most-Popular Baby Names

Karen Murphy — Thu, 13 Dec 2007 20:51:00 GMT

All I can say is, the Reign of Terror is over. Baby names Emily and Jacob are dethroned. Oh, I mean Emma. Emily, Emma, whatever (they're practically the same, right?).

But, new problem. In the 2007 list of top ten baby boy names? Three of them rhyme. Did we all wake up on the same side of the "gee this name sounds so unique and different!" bed? I fell prey to that once. And had a kid who was forever known by her first name AND last initial.

So guess what the new most-popular baby names are? And how YOU can be more like Britney?

Oh. First you should know that this is BabyCenter's most-popular list based on about 300,000 names, and isn't the more comprehensive list published by the Social Security Administration. Whatever. Don't you still want to know where your baby stacks up?

New Top Two: Sophia and Aiden.

Really? Not bad, actually. Which is what the thousands of other parents throught before naming their kids that.

The rhyming boy names? Aiden/Caden/Jayden. Seriously. All three made the top ten. On the whole, the trend seems to be falling away from the proper British influence and more toward, um, what? Television? Or, worse, dubious celebrities?

Top 10 for Boys

1) Aiden

2) Ethan

3) Jacob

4) Jayden

5) Caden

6) Noah

7) Jackson

8) Jack

9) Logan

10) Matthew

Top 10 for girls:

1) Sophia

2) Isabella

3) Emma

4) Madison

5) Ava

6) Addison

7) Hailey

8) Emily

9) Kaitlyn

10) Olivia

Photo: bp3blogger.com

It's a Small World, After All

Kelly Mills — Tue, 08 May 2007 19:11:00 GMT

Hey, I apologize in advance if anyone reading the title of this post ends up humming a certain tune for the rest of the day. Babycenter is going to be releasing the results of some surveys of parenting styles and beliefs from around the world. It'll be an international look at stuff like sleep routines, maternity and paternity leave, and division of household labor. Sounds like the results can be summarized with "There are some things we do differently, and some we do the same." Shocker!

Here's some preview tidbits: In China, "There's a widespread belief that exposure to computers, microwaves, and cell phones can lead to miscarriage or birth defects, according to BabyCenter editor Joy Jia. As a result, many pregnant women buy 'antiradiation vests' to protect their developing babies." I believe my giant maternity underwear might have also had antiradiation properties.

How about another one? "In Mexico and other Latin American countries, many believe that if you don't eat the food you crave during pregnancy, your baby will have a birthmark shaped like that food." Luckily, I indulged, so my child did not end up with a birthmark shaped like a deli-made roast beef sandwich, extra mayo, and cheddar cheese Ruffles chips (which you put on the sandwich as soon as you reach the privacy of your car.)

Or from Cuba and Panama: "People in many Latin American countries share a belief in the 'evil eye' — that is, the power of an evil or envious person to cause harm to a pregnant woman or her baby. In Cuba, pregnant women won't let anyone they don't know or trust touch their pregnant belly." I wish I had heard of this one when I was pregnant, because all that belly-touching from total strangers was creepy. I would have loved to shout, "Get your evil eye away from me!"

I wonder what the one for the U.S. would be... Maybe: "In the United States, many pregnant women believe they are supposed to exercise enough to be in the best shape of their lives, even though most are too tired and manatee-like to do it and just end up feeling really guilty. Also, people think the second trimester is a magical, racy time of constant sex, when hello! Tired manatee... Oh, and there's this overall belief that pregnancy brings on a certain glow-y euphoria, when lots of women are really just channeling the sleepy sea-cow."

'Green' Parenting Goes Mainstream

Alisyn — Tue, 17 Apr 2007 17:01:00 GMT

From cloth diapers to preservative free toys to organic cotton onesies to natural soaps, modern mamas are flexing their purchasing power more than ever, and 56% of us are doing our best to go green (or at least, greener). According to a poll taken by BabyCenter, women are living more eco-friendly lives to protect their children's health, and our planet, for the next generation.

So, how are we doing that? Little by little: we're buying more non-toxic cleaning products, recycling, eating organic food, using energy efficient appliances, and educating ourselves about the hazards of chemicals in our daily lives. Perhaps most importantly, though, we're teaching our kids to be smart about what they put on and in their bodies, and the importance of green living.

In recent years green living has become less of an urban/hippie trend, and more the societal norm, with the demand for eco-friendly products growing all the time. They used to be specialty products in specialty stores, but now eco-friendly products can be found in most mainstream superstores across the country.

Linda Murray, Editor-in-Chief of BabyCenter has a theory about how this shift came about: "Today's moms know small steps can add up and they want to do their part. It's a natural extension of the protective mothering instinct that kicks in the minute a woman learns she's pregnant. She becomes keenly aware of whether her food, activities, products, and environment are safe."

That pretty much sums up why I started eating organic, as well as buying chemical-free and non-toxic products whenever I can. Having kids is a pretty powerful catalyst for change - and having a strong collective voice is to speak out about the need for cleaner living for those kids is powerful as well.

Moms rule.