Strollerderby : beauty

Not Another Tween Beauty Crisis

JeanneSager — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 19:26:00 GMT

Want to know if another generation of kids is headed for holy hellfire? According to Salon's Broadsheet, just check out Newsweek.

Broadsheet's Amy Benfer has pulled Newsweek articles from now, the late nineties, early nineties and the eighties that all say the same thing: today's tween girls are growing up too fast, they're skankier than the previous generation of tween girls, they know too much about naughty things, aaaack. Avert your eyes!

What prompted the rant? A Newsweek article on Generation Diva, a comment on the trainwreck that is TLC's Toddlers and Tiaras that attempts to define the new normal as "a generation that primps and dyes and pulls and shapes, younger and with more vigor."

Author Jessica Bennett says, "Girls today are salon vets before they enter elementary school. Forget having mom trim your bangs, fourth graders are in the market for lush $50 haircuts; by the time they hit high school, $150 highlights are standard. Five-year-olds have spa days and pedicure parties. And instead of shaving their legs the old-fashioned way—with a 99-cent drugstore razor—teens get laser hair removal, the most common cosmetic procedure of that age group."

First thing Broadsheet's Benfer points out is exactly what I thought when reading the article - how many parents have the money for $50 haircuts for themselves, not to mention their kids? Granted, I'm now bald, but even before that, my haircuts have always been under $20. Throw in an occasional eyebrow wax (which, yes, is a luxury that I have clung to more as a mom who needs SOMETHING of my own), and we're still under $30 - with tip. My daughter, meanwhile, has had two haircuts in her three, almost four, years of life: one when she was under a year to cut the dark colored newborn tips off the ingrowing blonde baby hair, the second to clean up her own "fix it" job to her hair.

Frankly - I don't see a problem with having taken her to a salon.Technically, neither cut cost us a dime because the hairdresser was a close friend, but I would have paid (tried to pay) to have my daughter's hair cut by a professional - in part so I could do the mom thing and take pictures of her first cut and in part so I didn't have to hold her still, concentrate on cutting in straight lines, make something out of the mess she'd made. It was WORTH IT to me to take her to a salon instead of doing it myself. Does that mean I've set her up to put beauty above brains or made her vain? Nonsense!

She gets her toenails painted too - usually by my mother, who delights in their at home girls night bonding sessions. I guess that's technically a pedicure party, but is that really that bad either? I loved having my toenails painted when I was her age too - by my babysitter, who ironically now owns her own nail salon - and if you'll remember, I'm the mom who shaved her head . . . I'm hardly your beauty-obsessed airhead.

Which is the real issue here - how a mother looks at beauty. If she's struggling in this economy and pulling out $150 for highlights, she's the monster creating a monster. If she's putting her kid on Toddlers and Tiaras, she's just a plain old monster.

But if she's letting her three-year-old wear nail polish because it's sparkly, and she just wants to sparkle . . . she's letting kids be kids.

Image: Amazon (read it - it's hilarious)

A New Anti-Aging Miracle Treatment Made From Baby Foreskins

Cole Gamble — Fri, 21 Nov 2008 16:03:00 GMT

For just a moment, I ask you readers to imagine me as a pitchman on the back of an old timey wagon…

“Ladies and gentlemen, I am here to tell you we’re all getting’ older. Yessiree, why in fact you’re older now than you were when I started this pitch. Heck you’re even older now. And now you’re older yet. Folks, there’s absolutely nothing you can do to hold off the inevitability of aging and all the unsavory drooping that comes with it. That is, until now. Right here in my hand I hold what may be the greatest miracle invention on this earth since God invented the baby Jesus. Inside this seemingly normal bottle is a gen-u-ine fountain of youth. Yep, take a little dab and you’ll transform into a schoolgirl in pig tails once again. It’s called Vavelta and it’s the handy-dandy, superfied, bone-fide, quantified miracle cure to make you look young once more.

And how Mr. Gamble, you ask, do we know this miracle cure works? Why, my good folks, because it’s derived from the most amazing substance on God’s Green Earth: little baby foreskins.”

Okay, enough with the snake-oil salesman act. Let’s get to the nitty gritty. Like: How? Why? What?!

Like I said, the product is called Vavelta and it’s claimed to work better than Botox or any of the other conventional wrinkle eradicating products on the market. So where do the baby foreskins come in? Let’s ask Britain’s Daily Mail:

"Vavelta is a clear liquid in which tiny skin cells, called fibroblasts, are suspended. These are derived from baby foreskins donated by mothers at a hospital in the U.S. after routine circumcision. The mothers and babies are screened before the foreskins, which would otherwise be discarded, are used.
Once in Britain, they are divided into pieces less than a centimeter square and treated with enzymes to release the fibroblasts. These are grown in sterile conditions in labs. The process is monitored by the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) in the U.S. and by Britain's Human Tissue Authority."

(Suddenly writing this article has flooded my brain with foreskin jokes learned long ago that are wholly inappropriate here.)

The ladies who tested the product in trials say it’s a life changing miracle with few side effects. And it comes at a miracle price: $2,300.

So I ask you: women already inject fat and botulism into their faces, is this any weirder? And are you down with injecting little boy foreskins into your face for the sake of eternal(ish) youth?

More by this author:

Pregnant Man Receiving Death Threats

10 WORST. BABY. PRODUCTS. EVER! (Part 1)

Will Smith Remakes The Karate Kid, Casts His Son in Lead

Horrifyingly Cute Animals

10 Things You May Not Know About Pregnancy (and might shock you)

Cute Overload: White Tiger Kitten and Monkey are Friends (PICS!)

Men with Baby Heads

The 26 Most Disturbing Kids Movies Ever

In Hard Economic Times, Bonnie Fuller Knows What Women Want

Kelly Mills — Mon, 20 Oct 2008 22:36:00 GMT

Lots of people have been saying that in this election, women finally matter. At last our concerns and issues are being heard and addressed as though we, you know, made up half the population or something. And clearly one of the issues that matters to women is the economy, what with how it affects all our lives and all. So it makes sense that Bonnie Fuller, in her NY Times blog post, would want to examine what matters to women in these troubled and uncertain financial times. Is it health care costs? Job security? The high price of food and gas? Planning for our retirements (ha!) or trying to save in case the kids want to go to college?

Uh, no. According to Fuller, what matters to us is... our looks.

Yes, while we may feel the wolf at the door, we apparently still shell out money for our pricey hair stylists and our Botox. Oh, but let's clarify: By "women" she means women who live in New York. And she knows what they all want, because she "canvassed" some stylists, plastic surgeons, cosmetic companies, and "even" body waxers. (What's up with that, Bonnie? Don't minimize the importance of the waxers.) Do my frequent quotation marks indicate that I think her ideas are about as helpful as an untreatable rash? Here's her closer: "Time will tell, I guess, but the anecdotal evidence suggests that New York women may end up living in a box on the West Side Highway, but we’ll still have fabulous highlights and perfectly shaped eyebrows!"

Cough.

So we could debate the ideas that spring to mind here, whether women are vain or held to a higher aesthetic standard that relates to their employment prospects, but this piece proves the trend of women clinging to Botox as much as it proves fairies exist, so it ain't worth it. Maybe I'll canvas some women and ask if during a time when people are worried about being able to provide for their children, if Fuller actually makes women look bad or if she's just more like a really annoying gnat, and we'd be better off ignoring her and hoping she finds an open window somewhere.

A third of parents no longer saving for college

Explaining financial troubles to the kids

New Uses for Old Products

Adrienne Martini — Wed, 09 Apr 2008 13:00:00 GMT

The solution for younger-looking skin has been with us all the time! We've just been foolish and wasteful enough to throw it away!

No, beauty isn't a result of diet or exercise or positive self-talk. It's locked away in the placenta.

I know what you're thinking. I'm thinking the same think, even more so now that I googled for placenta images. But a Japanese company called Nihon Sofuken is marketing a new line of "drinks, jellies and face masks" that harness the healing powers of the afterbirth.

I have nothing against the placenta. They are great, placentas are. I just don't want to smear it on my face -- even if it has, as Nihon promotes, a "delicate peach" flavor and is technically vegan.

Rest assured, pregnant ladies. Your former organs will not be snatched up after delivery. The products are only made from pig placentas. I'm just not sure if that is more squick inducing or less.

Photo credit: dailymail.co.uk

Creepiest Story of the Day: Bikini Waxes for Eight-Year-Olds

Kelly Mills — Fri, 28 Mar 2008 17:33:00 GMT

Some of this is so extreme you just can't imagine it: There's a story in Philadelphia Magazine (via Jezebel) about moms who take their kids to spas for treatments. As in, bikini waxes, and we're talking about an eight-year-old. (And yes, they discuss the fact that an eight-year-old probably has no pubic hair to wax.) And teens getting botoxed. Ten-year-olds with aesthetician-created, perfectly arched brows. Six-year-olds getting weekly blowouts. Yeeeugh. Clearly something has gone horribly awry here.

The author says it's a slippery slope though. How many moms start off with the mani-pedi bonding experience with their girls? And if your ten-year-old gets teased about acne, is it so wrong to take her for weekly facials? As a mom who has been fairly permissive on the nail polish front, I thought hard about this one. Here's where I draw lines: When my kid and I lounge at home and do the nail painting thing, it's about being goofy, like playing dress-up. I let her coat my toes in blue lacquer. But when the goal is to present some bizarre idealized image of perfection to the outside world, when spa treatments become simply necessary upkeep because heaven forbid the world sees you with stray brow hairs, and that's something girls as young as ten need a mommy lesson in, then I think it has moved over into yikes.

There's some discussion of the necessity of going through the "ugly" phase of youth as crucial for learning self-acceptance. I think we have such a narrow vision of beauty if it doesn't allow full brows and necessitates some freaky pre-emptive strike against frown lines. It's not just about stealing your daughter's childhood, it's also about the imposing the most bizarre of standards--Don't get wrinkles, don't have body hair, look at all times like the boring celebrities you see in magazines. Clearly many of the moms in the story see their girls as extensions of themselves, and that's a far cry from aiding your pre-teen with a few pimples.

Suave Isn't Hawking Hair Products, They Just Wanna Help a Martyr Mom Out

Kelly Mills — Tue, 11 Mar 2008 23:00:00 GMT

First, thank you to Mom2Two for pointing me towards this ad campaign by Suave (I have Tivo, so I see nary a commercial these days.) It goes like this: Rapid shots of lady looking pretty, lady then in wedding dress, pregnant lady, harried lady-mom in assorted outfits, mom-lady looking a little haggard, mom-lady fixed up purty by Suave styling products. The campaign line is: "Motherhood Isn't Always Pretty" and the ad says "89 % of moms admit they let themselves go... 100% can get themselves back." Wow, and 100% of moms in my house got crabby when they saw this.

Can you imagine if this campaign was aimed at dads? Dads, did you let yourselves go? Would a styling product help you get "yourself" back? Because this is a theme we've seen like, a billion times: Moms are martyrs who sacrifice even their looks for their families. And so making yourself beautiful again through the latest cream or shampoo or surgery isn't a question of feeling the external pressure on women to be beautiful, or even swallowing what advertisers want us to buy, oh no--it's an act of self-love. It's getting in touch with yourself, the real you, the pre-family you, the you who can only be uncovered when you look hot.

Yeah, 100% of moms can get themselves back, just by using styling products. You tired from all that sacrifice? Well, there's this hairspray that will do what a living wage and quality childcare and affordable housing and a good educational system and real healthcare won't do. It will totally take the place of a community that raises children, saving families from the isolation that hits us hard. And on a personal level, being pretty will give you that sense of personhood and satisfaction you'd never get from a society that values motherhood and parenting in general and encourages moms to be people, not endless fountains of sacrifice. Yippee for my friggin' Suave shampoo. Now, could we get a new way of selling crap to moms? Because I can only be so strident for so long.

Pregnancy Glow Replaces Botox

Madeline Holler — Thu, 31 Jan 2008 16:30:00 GMT

No judgment here, I'm just reporting the facts. On Botox.

Pregnant women are advised to end Botox treatments and fillers from conception to birth to weaning. But a hiatus from these face-enhancing treatments, for many people, means a face that goes back to its saggy, droopy, wrinkly self. One Hollywood Botox peddler would like to disagree.

He says the weight-gain from pregnancy -- and the woman's radiant glow -- do wonders to maintain the puffed and youthful look of a freshly treated mug.

"Pregnancy adds a natural glow to a woman's skin, and the 'baby weight' gain will make the face fuller -- this extra weight naturally replaces the effects of fillers or Botox in the face by filling in unwanted lines and wrinkles for the duration of the pregnancy."

You may not have a choice, in any case, since physicians are advised not to administer fillers to pregnant women, though there is not actual evidence that Botox harms a fetus. Though someday THAT, like soft cheese and hair dye, might be up for debate.

The good news is newborns can't really see. So there's at least one person who will love you no matter how saggy your face.

Pre-Teen Beauty Addicts

MetroDad — Mon, 06 Aug 2007 22:43:00 GMT

Bethany Conheeny takes two hours to get ready every morning. After washing her naturally wavy hair, she spritzes, sprays and straightens it with designer ceramic straighteners. If there's so much as a kink left, she starts again. She's rigorous in her cleansing, toning and moisturizing routine, and before leaving the house, applies a slick of lip-gloss. She also loves getting weekly pedicures, manicures, eyebrow waxes and fake tans.

The catch? Bethany is a 9-year-old girl!

From the Daily Mail comes a frightening story detailing the beauty regimens of some British girls who have some decidedly adult habits: from getting their hair highlighted to "shaking their booty" to wearing sexy low-cut dresses. Apparently, these kids are spending far more time on their looks than they are studying---or doing anything else, for that matter.

The author of the article implies that's the least of these girls' problems and intimates that these childrens' mothers are to blame, saying that "the uncomfortable truth is that Bethany is not a woman, she's a child, one of thousands of young girls being bombarded by society's confused and damaging messages as they grow up — messages it appears are being reinforced by their mothers."

Check out the article (if only to read the comments from these girls' mothers) and let me know what you think. Personally, I find it disturbing on so many levels.

Is Breaking the Cycle of Mom-Frump Easy?

Patti — Fri, 06 Jul 2007 18:27:00 GMT

I think even the most narcissistic among us has a period of post-partum apathy toward our appearance. I did, and I am one of those women who hasn't left the house without mascara and lipstick since I turned twelve. Some of us snap out of it and go back to our old primping selves, some of us decide we like the freedom of not worrying about what we look like, and some of us struggle mightily to find some kind of appearance-related happy place.

This article at Cleverparents pretty much nails the reasons why women fall into the frump-trap, but the proffered solutions are, pardon my French, a load of merde. If we've established that none of our cute clothes fit us when we're still Stay-Puft three months after delivering, then obviously "there has to be something in your closet that you can wear" is complete nonsense. There's maternity clothes and there's a bunch of stuff that doesn't fit. What exactly are we supposed to do with that? And if I have to deconstruct why it's not always a foregone conclusion that mothers have time for professional manicures and pedicures, then please let me know. I'll just say that my subconscious is fully aware of my value, and that my value is not equal to paying a sitter thirty bucks for the privilege of allowing me the freedom to pay a pedicurist another thirty to paint my toenails, something I can do for pretty much free all by myself. In the interest of not using words that would upset our advertisers, I will completely ignore the lingerie suggestions.

The real problem isn't that women aren't placing enough importance on their appearance after having children, it's that people, including "experts" like Sara Holliday continue to equate appearance with self-esteem. My daily eyelash-curling doesn't make me a better mother, woman, or human being than another mama's sweats.

Detangler Round-Up: If You Can't Shave It You Have To Comb It

Melissa Summers — Sat, 28 Apr 2007 19:02:00 GMT

Abebi's Safari Detangler comes from Nigeria and "is designed for big bad tangles and little ones too". It detangles, conditions and leaves hair static free it also makes your child smell like pineapple. Have we all noticed these detanglers make our kids smell like delicious fruit? Are we eating them?

Emma at The Stylish Child raves about Children's Miracle Detangler by The Original Little Sprout. She says it's made short work of her son's curls, curls which clumped together in a mess of tangles which laughed in the face of a comb. All without the formaldehyde found in some detanglers. The product description also mentions it "calms bedhead and nap hair", in our house we call it "Breakfast Head" and my son wakes up everyday with the most amazing plumage on the back of his head.

I use my Sebastian Potion 9 on my daughter's hair right out of the shower. It's not technically a detangler, more of a rich leave in conditioner full 9 natural ingredients like jojoba seed oil, olive oil and willow bark extract. It gets rid of tangles but also gives my daughter's (and my) fine hair a bit of body. It seems to keep her hair from getting too tangly overnight on the days she doesn't shower.

My Daughter Says She's Fat: My Daughter is 5

Rachael Brownell (Redsy) — Fri, 09 Mar 2007 17:54:00 GMT

The news is filled with studies reporting that younger and younger girls are worried about being thin. Nevertheless, I was taken aback this morning when my sweet lovely daughter asked me if I thought she was "fat" to which I replied (once I recovered my composure) "Fat isn't a bad thing, honey, it just means you're growing big and strong."

When I heard I was having twin girls 'lo those many moons ago I figured one of my biggest challenges would be to teach them not to be obsessed with cultural messages about their worth measured by their looks. I knew I wanted them to be in sports, and remain free of as many main stream anti-women messages as I could muster. Girls in sports are less likely to drop out of school, more confident about their bodies, and more likely to experience business success.

But there are many elements of their lives I cannot control. They go to their Dad's house every other weekend and their older half sister is 10 going on 20. I wouldn't be surprised if she's already dieting. They head off to Kindergarten next year where they'll be around other kids with varying backgrounds. In other words, it's really only a matter of time before they are inundated with messages about weight and beauty. In the end, the most powerful message I can send my daughters is by being healthy and strong myself and by not participating in the usual self-reproach and diet discussions common around neighborhood kitchen tables everywhere.

When Children's Underwear Says "Wink, Wink" There's a Problem

Mike Adamick (Cry It Out!) — Tue, 27 Feb 2007 20:02:00 GMT

The American Psychological Association released a study that -- surprise, surprise -- says young girls today are bombarded with sexual imagery that throttles their self-esteem and could actually make them dumb. Or at least perform poorly on tests when wearing bathing suits. Seriously. It's in the study.

From racy blogs to stupid dolls, thongs for 7 year olds to underdressed pop culture figures, girls face a tsunami of images and messages that could lead children to act sexually like adults and adults to act like children.

Of course, it's not too late to protect childhood. While the association calls for more study, it also offers some get-real talking points for parents. I've written about this before, probably too many times, but it's good to know I'm not the only one that finds it more than a little odd that some children's underwear says "wink, wink."

And Here I Thought a Spa Day Was an Escape from the Kids

Patti — Fri, 02 Feb 2007 19:25:00 GMT

I try not to have preconceived ideas about when I'm going to let my daughters do things, because I honestly have no idea what will be acceptable for nine-year-olds by the time they're nine, or for fourteen-year-olds when they're fourteen. But I always kind of figured that the first time I brought them for a professional mani-pedi would be when they reach menarche, for lack of a more appropriate coming-of-age ritual in our culture. And I kind of figured it wouldn't be a regular thing until they could pay for it themselves.

I can't know what the future brings, but I kind of hope I don't end up doing what these New York moms are doing, and taking my nine-year-old for massages at the day spa (and if my future nine-year-olds are tense enough to require massages, shouldn't I be taking them to family therapy?). A $75 minifacial for a child? My face broke out just reading that. Shouldn't spa days be for adult relaxation, rejuvenation, chats about your vajayjay?

Right now my girls are four and two, and it's way too early for me to know for sure when they'll be joining me at the nail parlor--I don't even let them have polish on their fingernails yet. But if Present Me ever gets a chance to visit Future Me, and discovers that Future Me is taking her tweens in for a spa day, I might want to slap me.