Strollerderby : celebrity kids

UPDATE: Jamie Foxx Apologizes To Miley Cyrus

Brett Singer — Sun, 19 Apr 2009 03:30:00 GMT

Jamie Foxx issued a mea culpa on The Tonight Show With Jay Leno. EOnline.com reports that Foxx responded with a "Yeah" when Jay Leno asked him "Did you say something inappropriate?" Here's the rest of it from EOnline:

"I so apologize to [Cyrus], and this is sincere...I am a comedian, and you guys know that whatever I say, I don't mean any of it. And sometimes, as comedians, as we do, we go a little bit too far. I have a radio show...We're really the black Howard Stern. We go at everybody. There was a situation with Miley Cyrus, and I just want to say, I apologize for what I said. I didn't mean it maliciously. You know I'm a comedian."

Then, looking at the camera, "Miley, I apologize, so I'll call you. I got a daughter too, so I completely understand."

So there you go. Good enough? I think so. Do you agree?

Original post follows below.

*-*-*-*-*

So, like, hey now.

A little background. Jamie Foxx has a channel on SiriusXM Satellite Radio where he does a show called The Foxxhole. He said some... things about Miley Cyrus (aka Miley Ray Cyrus Hannah Montana Stewart Lipschutz). Someone called in and mentioned Miley's little dustup with Radiohead (she wanted to meet them, they said no, she got pissy and yakked about it on some radio show). The Oscar-winning Mr. Foxx then went off a bit. Here's the audio, which is not safe for work. At all. Seriously. You have been warned.

So yeah. He said it. There are a few other people in the mix, and I'm not sure who said what. I'm fairly certain it was Jamie Foxx who said that Miley should make a "sex tape", and then a female voice added "with your dad." "White bitch" was in there. Also something about doing heroin "like Britney" (I must have missed that headline about Brit nodding out), as well as a suggestion that Miley catch VD from a bicycle seat. (I didn't think that was possible, but hey, what do I know?)

A few things to say here. First, Foxx said this on his radio show this past Sunday. It appears to only be coming out now. That doesn't diminish it, but it does mean that not a lot of people heard the comments. Second, he was trying to be funny. That doesn't excuse the comments at all, of course. But in theory performers get more latitude when it comes to humor.

As for what was said: it was completely inappropriate and in incredibly poor taste. I'm not a fan of Miley's; I think her music is horrible, and the message of her entire persona seems to be that fame is a goal worth trying for, which is something I don't agree with. (That's the short version of a longer thought that I'll share one of these days.) In my opinion you can make fun of anything and talk about whatever you want. But when its an underage person, boy or girl, and you start saying "white bitch" and suggest that she make a sex tape with her dad, that seems unnecessary. He has the right to say it. But why would he? (A commenter at LATimes.com says that the Foxx clip is somewhat out of context, but, like the Rodney King video, I'm not sure that context matters in this case. Maybe it does, but I doubt it.)

There's also plenty to make fun of when it comes to Miley. The Radiohead thing. The fact that she sleeps in her parents bed sometimes, despite being sixteen years old. Her music. Her TV show. Lots of material to work with before you go to "white bitch" who should do heroin and make a sex tape.

What do you think? Should underage famous people be off-limits, at least in some ways? Or did Miley deserve it?

Source: EOnline

Image: Amazon

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Did Sarah Palin Know That Bristol Was Sleeping With Levi?

Brett Singer — Sat, 04 Apr 2009 22:07:00 GMT

In an interview with Tyra Banks that will air on Monday, Levi Johnston says that Alaska Governor Sarah Palin "probably knew" that he was having sex with her daughter Bristol. Levi also tells Tyra that Mama Palin allowed the young lovers to sleep in the same bed at her home.

Well. As the Church Lady might say, isn't that special.

It's all well and good to scream and holler about how "the media" should "leave these kids alone," as Angie Harmon recently did on Fox News. But someone needs to tell these kids to stop doing so many interviews. I mean, Tyra? Really Levi? Why? If the reason is "because they asked," someone needs to point out to the young hockey player that "no thanks" is an acceptable reply.

Over at ParentDish, Susan Wagner writes that Bristol and Levi "clearly they haven't been getting very good guidance from the adults in their lives. It's our job as parents to help our teens mature into responsible people, and sometimes that means saying no -- to sex and to interviews." Funny how the advice from "the media" can be better than whatever these two seem to be getting from their own parents.

Source: US Magazine via AOL ParentDish

Image: FameCrawler

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NBA's Eddie House and Son Hoop it Up at Cartoon Network

JeanneSager — Thu, 26 Mar 2009 20:59:00 GMT

Think being a celebrity gets you all the cool perks? Try being his son.

Jaelen House's dad Eddie is the back-up guard for the 2008 World Champion Boston Celtics. Like seven-year-olds everywhere, Jaelen is also a big fan of the Cartoon Network.

Now the two are coming together - Jaelen House is getting his own Cartoon Network show about being the son of Eddie House and living the day-to-day life of a sports superstar's son. One of House and wife Charlsie's three kids (including a set of twins), Jaelen is a regular on the sidelines at Celtics games, cheering for his dad, who serves as back-up guard to Ray Allen and Rajon Rondo. House was a member of the championship winning team last year, coming off the bench to help boost the team. He scored nine points in the crucial game 4 comeback that helped the Celtics secure their victory.

According to Turner Broadcasting, which owns Cartoon Network, My Dad is a Pro is "the first series of the recently announced multifaceted partnership between Cartoon Network and the NBA." The channel will also be launching extensive basketball-related content on its Website.

The kid's eye view of the game sounds like it will help launch a new generation of fans, but we won't know for awhile what the Jaelen-Eddie dynamic will do for mini point guards everywhere. My Dad is a Pro will begin airing this fall.

Image: Boston Celtics

Is Miley Cyrus' First Photo Shoot Creepy?

Brett Singer — Tue, 16 Dec 2008 21:15:00 GMT

Miley Ray Cyrus Hannah Montana Stewart Lipschutz's first photo shoot has surfaced. The shots were taken back in 2002, and some of them are way creepy. At least that's my opinion. You may feel differently. Let's take a look, shall we?

Some of the images are fairly tame, even for kiddie modeling shots.

Then comes the belly shirt. And the quasi-pouty face.

Actually, I can't decide if this last one is a pout or a "Why am I doing this?" expression.

I'm not a big fan of putting your kids into the entertainment industry. There are obviously cases where the kid wants to do it, and sometimes the kid wants to do it and actually has some talent. But how does a parent participate in a photo shoot where their daughter is wearing a midriff-bearing t-shirt? I feel a bit creepy just writing about this.

Here's a shot with, I think, Miley's mommy.

Not sure if this was candid or staged. I’m thinking staged. She appears to be primping Miley Ray Whatever for the next shot. Either way it's… well, I can't come up with a better word than creepy. And I'm not sure I need to.

One thing for sure – the next time Miley Ray Cyrus Hannah Montana Stewart Lipschutz and her crew complain that Annie Leibovitz or some other celebrity photog somehow tricked them into a racy photo spread, we need not take that seriously for even a second.

As little girl role models go, Miley is certainly better than Tila Tequila or Britney Spears. But would you want your daughter dressing like this? And would you take pictures of it? This isn't JonBenet Ramsey creepy, but it's close. What exactly are you going for when you dress a ten-year-old girl (the age she was in the shoot) like this?

I know I’m getting all moral majority butthead on you. But what do you think of these pics? (Links to the full gallery, which is enormous, are below if you really want to see them all.) Creepy? Not creepy? Would you let your daughter do a photo spread like this at age 10?

Source: MileyWorld via OceanUp via Buzzfeed

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Name Guru Picks Eight Worst Celeb Kid Names of 2008 (Part 1)

Name Guru Picks Eight Worst Celeb Kid Names of 2008 (Part 2)

Nine-Year-Old Lothario Gets Movie Deal

Name Guru Picks Eight Worst Celeb Kid Names of 2008 (Part 2)

Brett Singer — Mon, 15 Dec 2008 17:00:00 GMT

The Final Four! No, it's not March yet. This is the Final Four Celebrity Kid Names of 2008. Less exciting than college basketball, but hey, it's only December.

Here you go:

(You can read Part 1, with numbers eight through five, here.)

4. Ignatius Martin Upton
(son of Cate Blanchett and Andrew Upton)
This one isn't in the "that's not even a name" category, but it definitely isn't a great choice. The name "Ignatius" reminds me of Ignatius J. Reilly, the lead character of A Confederacy of Dunces. Ignatius (the character) is kind of a putz, to put it mildly. Still, not EVERYONE has read that book (although many people have) and there are probably other folks who were named Ignatius who were not putzy. And again, the middle name is good – Martin Upton actually sounds pleasantly British.

3. Bronx Mowgli Wentz
(son of Ashlee Simpson-Wentz and Pete Wentz)
OK, this one is bad. And no middle name to fall back on. The only hope for little Bronx (sheesh! Poor kid) is if Ashlee and Pete come to their senses and change his name to something else. If that doesn't happen, Zowie Bowie (son of David) no longer goes by his given name; he's now Duncan Jones, although at age 12 he asked people to call him Joe. (His full birth name was Duncan Zowie Haywood Jones.) So lil' Bronxy can change his own name when he gets older. I'm sure Zowie Bowie sounded funny to ol' Dave in 1971, but he came to his senses later in life – his daughter with current wife Iman is named Alexandria. Lansky puts this one at #3, if I were making a list like this, Bronx Mowgli Wentz would be #1 with a bullet.

2. Jagger Joseph Blue Goldberg
(daughter of Soleil Moon Frye and Jason Goldberg)
This one is bad, although I think Bronx Mowgli is worse. Again, at least the kid can go with Joseph. And while Jagger isn't exactly a great name, at least it's pretty easy to figure out who the kid was named after. Lansky really goes off on the former Punky Brewster this time: he says that he "had no idea that Jagger Joseph Blue was a girl" until he read the press release twice (twice! What nonsense. Bruce Lansky is a very busy man). Then he attacks the now-elderly Mick Jagger, saying that he does not provide an adequate role model "for a baby girl." (Bruce? Try decaf.) Then he says that "Soleil and Jason picked three names and couldn’t find one that’s likely to make their little girl happy," and caps off his mini-tirade by saying the following: "I find it surprising that a woman with two strange names…would pick three strange names for her daughter." I actually don't find it terribly surprising, especially if you consider the fact that Soleil's childhood had to be at least a little bit weird since she grew up on TV, and on a sub-par show at that ("Punky Brewster" isn't exactly "The Odd Couple"). Lansky does offer some useful info: "Soleil means 'sun' in French, so translated into English her name reads 'Sun Moon Frye'." Perhaps somebody's parents were smoking a little something when it was baby-naming time.

1. Zuma Nesta Rock Rossdale
(son of Gwen Stefani and Gavin Rossdale)
This is bad. Very bad. I think Bronx Mowgli is worse, but this one is really not good at all. Lansky focuses on what I think are pointless facts: that no one will know that, "Zuma is a beach in Malibu and that Nesta is Bob Marley’s middle name." If they did, would that make it better? However, Gwen Stefani is making big, big money – music, that fashion line, and endorsements, to name a few. So "I'm Gavin and Gwen's son" will probably go a long way towards dismissing the obvious name lameness. Maybe he can hang out with Knox Jolie-Pitt. They can console each other, each sitting on their own enormous pile of money, trying to decide how many women they should take home tonight.

Final comment: Obviously this is meant to be amusing. Having money and fame does not mean that a kid can't grow up screwy. But having money probably doesn't hurt, and let's face it – while a lot of these names are awful, most really aren't Pilot Inspektor-level awful. Not that it isn't fun to make fun of them. And let's not forget that having a funny name didn't stop a certain guy from becoming President of the United States. Perhaps one day we'll see the Bronx Mowgli Wentz / Zuma Nesta Rock Rossdale ticket. Yes… we… can…

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Name Guru Picks Eight Worst Celeb Kid Names of 2008 (Part 1)

Brett Singer — Sun, 14 Dec 2008 19:00:00 GMT

I want Bruce Lansky's job. I mean, the guy just sits around all day and talks about names. Not even deep etymological studies, although sometimes he goes there. It's really just baby names. As near as I can tell, this is a way to make a living. America is a wonderful country.

Anyway, Mr. Lansky has weighed in with a list of the Eight Worst Celebrity Baby Names of 2008. So from the home office in my, um, home, here we go:

8. Sunday Rose Kidman Urban
(daughter of Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban)

This one doesn't seem that bad to me. At least not compared to some of the others. Maybe the kid starts going by Rose. Rose is a nice name. Sunday, not so much. Lansky says, "Apparently the name was chosen to honor a patron of the arts in Australia, but most people who hear or read the name will find it an odd choice for an American girl born on a Monday." Whatever, dude.

7. Honor Marie Warren
(daughter of Jessica Alba and Cash Warren)

Again, not that bad. Kid could use the middle name. Dad's name is "Cash." That's much worse. (Unless you happen to be a rapper. Then it's OK.) Lansky says that Alba and her beau will probably start using their daughter's middle name themselves at some point, saying "that’s why it’s so important to pick a “high-odds” middle name when parents pick a risky first name." Not a bad strategy I suppose.

6. Emme Anthony
(daughter of Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony)

This time Lansky takes issue with potential pronunciation problems (say THAT phrase ten times fast), as well as spelling: "it’ll be misspelled ninety-nine times out of a hundred." Then he wags his virtual finger at the Lopez's (I say "Lopez's" because let's face it, Jen is in charge in that house): "That’s what happens when you pick an obscure variation of one of the five most popular girls’ names in the U.S. Emma would have been a much smarter choice." Except that this particular girl's name belongs to the daughter of someone who has made an enormous pile of money and is world-renowned. (Hint: she's married to some guy named Marc.) I tend to agree with Lansky that, when in doubt about a name for your offspring, go with the easier choice. That said, people get my name wrong all the time – one T, Bert, etc. Note to Emme: you'll get over it. I did.

5. Knox Leon Jolie-Pitt
(son of Three Guesses, The First Two Don't Count)

This name is odd. Lansky says that this poor lad will have trouble in school and will be forced to explain his name as, "Knox. As in Fort Knox." Yes. As in "my parents have more money than Fort Knox." Then he'll select one of the thousands of girls that want to date him and head over to the Viper Room in his chauffeur driven limo. Now I realize that money isn't everything. But it does make a dopey name a little bit easier deal with.

For the remaining four names, including what Lansky thinks is the worst Celeb Name of 2008, click here.

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Suri Cruise: Most Powerful Child On The Planet

Brett Singer — Wed, 19 Nov 2008 18:10:00 GMT

This is such an odd piece of news.

Suri Cruise, daughter of Tom "Who Needs Doctors When You Can Take Vitamins" Cruise and Katie "Is She Being Held Prisoner" Holmes has been declared "most influential celebrity kid". Now what is the source of this important ranking? Us Magazine perhaps? The National Enquirer?

No. Forbes magazine. Malcolm must be spinning in his grave.

What method did they use? According to MyHollywood.com, "financial investigators studied Internet presence and press clippings for more than 50 A-list offspring aged five years younger over the course of the last year…used a market research company to gauge the awareness of the kids and consumer-appeal of their celebrity parents." Suri won, with appearances in "more than 2,000 articles over the course of the year."

Here's the top ten if you're curious:

1. Suri Cruise
2. Shiloh Jolie-Pitt
3. Zahara Jolie-Pitt
4. Pax Jolie-Pitt
5. Sam Alexis Woods
6. Cruz Beckham
7. Matilda Rose Ledger
8. David Banda
9. Sean Preston Federline
10. Sam Sheen

By the way, I had to look up Sam Sheen (that's the offspring of Denise Richards and Charlie Sheen). So I feel slightly better about myself.

I have a thought. Why would a celebrity parent want their child to get this much exposure? Is it at all possible to keep kids out of the papers when you're this famous? In the case of a Suri Cruise or any of the Jolie-Pitts, wouldn't it be safer to lay low a little bit? Or does it matter in the age of social networking, photo sharing, and MyFaceSpaceBook?

Plus, this idea of "influential" seems questionable. Would you buy something because Suri Cruise endorsed it?

She is a cute little girl though. Maybe she could do Gap ads or something.

Last thought: How would you handle this sort of thing if you were mega-famous? I'm not sure what I would do, although it's not likely to be a problem in my life. My movie career began and ended when I auditioned for "Adventures in Babysitting" in the 80's.

Source/Images: MyHollywood, Famecrawler

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Disney Pulls Hannah Montana Diabetes Episode

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Disney Pulls Hannah Montana Diabetes Episode

Brett Singer — Wed, 12 Nov 2008 22:15:00 GMT

Hannah Montana has managed to piss off a bunch of parents. But it wasn't with her music.

Apparently the Disney Channel pulled what was going to be the first episode of the new season because some parents who saw it early complained. "The episode, titled 'No Sugar, Sugar,' finds Hannah’s friend Oliver learning he has diabetes and was intended to teach audiences that the disease is one that can be managed." Some parents, "had concerns about how the disease was portrayed," although the New York Times article I saw doesn't mention any specifics. The title does sound a little bit jokey. (Maybe they were trying to revive Miley's dad's series "Doc".) But come on -- what did they do? Put a Snickers on a fishing pole and dangle it in front of a diabetic character?

One thing that "Seinfeld" was supposed to have taught us is that the "very special episode" is usually a bad idea. I'm not saying that it's not a nice thing for a show watched by zillions of tweens to actually try to teach a lesson now and then. But usually it comes across as forced. (David Spade, before he was famous, used to do a funny stand-up routine about "a very special episode of 'Family Ties'" where Alex is caught masturbating. "Aw Mal, can't you knock?") I've never seen Hannah Montana, but my guess is that people don't usually watch the show looking for issues-oriented television.

For that, everybody knows you should watch the new "90210". I mean, really.

Interesting twist: Apparently Nick Jonas is diabetic, and Miley Ray Hannah Montana Stewart Cyrus Lipschitz used to wear some sort of "diabetic dog tag" in support of the Jonas Brother that she either was or wasn't dating. (I can't remember and don't care enough to look it up.)

I do think it’s a little weird when a network yanks a show – in this case before it even officially aired – based on the complaints of a few people. How bad could it have been? I remember an episode of "The Brady Bunch" where Mike says to Carol, "If I ever caught one of my sons playing with dolls, I'd send him to a psychiatrist." (Cue laugh track.) My mother heard the line and asked me if I thought that was an OK thing to say, especially since I played with action figures, which are very doll-like. So maybe a better move is to watch the show with your kids and talk to them about anything you find objectionable.

Or just shut the TV off. But let's not get too crazy.

Source: NYTimes, EntertainmentWise

Image: EntertainmentWise

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Oy vey, Miley showed her tuchas again

Brett Singer — Wed, 06 Aug 2008 19:00:00 GMT

I think we may be over-reacting just a tad to, like, everything Miley Ray Hannah Montana Stewart Cyrus does. (I know I've said it before, but this girl really does have more names than a Chekhov character.)

Now, I understood, a little bit, when people got upset about the Vanity Fair photo shoot. It seemed a little bit odd to be taking pictures of a 15 year old wearing nothing but a bed sheet. But sexualizing underage girls isn't a new thing for the entertainment business – Mandy Moore was 15 when she made "Candy" (here's the video), and Britney Spears was 17 when "…Baby One More Time" came out, with her wearing a skimpy schoolgirl outfit and writhing on the floor. Going further back, Brooke Shields was 14 in 1980 when she told the world that nothing came between her and her Calvins.

All of these examples, in my opinion, were sketchier than what's happening with Miley Ray Whatever. In theory, these were private photos that ended up in the public eye either by her own carelessness, a hacker, or, if you want to go with a total conspiracy theory, someone at Disney who sneaks them to the press. The latter seems insane, but who knows. No matter what the real story is (Miley's not returning my calls, so I don't know the truth) the photos themselves aren't that bad.

Now – they are photos of an underage girl in a state of semi-undress. Which makes them extremely creepy. So, somewhat like the "should Paps take snaps of Brit's kids in her own house?" question, what do you think about the never-ending stream of Miley photos? Do they mean she's "slutty" and a bad influence on America's impressionable young girls? Or is it, like, enough already, and should we listen to Dolly Parton and leave Miley alone?

image/source: GossipGirls

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Lourdes and Miley kidnapped?

Brett Singer — Wed, 16 Jul 2008 17:00:00 GMT

Have America's sweethearts been kidnapped? No, silly! Do you really think something like that would happen and you wouldn't hear about it? Here's the truth about these photos:

First, Lourdes Ciccone, daughter of Madonna. Who is that unmasked man holding her hand? Well, that's her dad. Not Guy Ritchie, but her biological dad, Carlos Leon. Carlos was once arrested for smoking pot in Washington Square Park, but as far as we know, he doesn't do that too often. They probably just saw The Rod (note: that's my new name for Alex Rodriguez; he's not just A rod -- he's THE Rod) across the street and wanted to get away before he started talking to them.

As for Miley/Hannah/Whatever (the girl has more names than a Chekhov character), she's just filming a new movie, which I won't see but will likely gross hundreds of millions of dollars. She doesn't look too happy but I'm guessing it was just a bad moment. Either that or The Rod was visiting the set that day.

images: NY Post, Now Magazine

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Tracy Ullman does Dina Lohan

Brett Singer — Mon, 02 Jun 2008 18:30:00 GMT

Does an IMPRESSION of Dina Lohan. Get your minds out of the gutter, people.

"OK, when Lindsay's heart stopped at Bungalow 8, that was my fault." Funny, nasty, not safe for work.

Make sure to stay with this video until the end where Tracy/Dina turns to a fellow mom and says, "Don't patronize me Lynn... at least my daughter never shaved her head."

Found at LA Times blogs, clip is from Tracy Ullman's State of the Union on Showtime

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Dina Lohan bans Lindsay from reality show; other kids, no problem

Brett Singer — Wed, 21 May 2008 14:01:00 GMT

Dina Lohan is so not winning mom of the year.

The mom/manager has decreed that her daughter Lindsay should not appear on her new E! reality show because it would be bad for her career. The excessive drinking though, that's just fine.

14 year-old Ali Lohan, who appears on "Living Lohan" with her 11-year-old brother Cody, says that she hopes the show will " convince the world her mother isn't a 'crazy freak'."

Well, watch this clip and you tell me what you think.

In it, Dina, while threatening web site operators with legal action if they don't remove photographs of her children, says, "They don't realize - Ali and Cody go to school every day... there's got to be boundaries for these people." Now maybe I'm the crazy one, but maybe putting your kids on television isn't the best way for them to have normal school experiences. Just a thought.

image: latimes.com

Should We Feel Sorry for Brit Now That Custody's Been Nixed?

Jessica Ashley (Sassafrass) — Mon, 01 Oct 2007 23:01:00 GMT

By now you know that a California court put an end to Britney Spears' parenting rights effective this Wednesday at noon, turning full custody of Sean Preston and Jayden to baby daddy Kevin Federline. Although it is unclear if an incident precipitated the order, it was the same judge who ordered the sequined pop un-sensation to undergo random drug testing, parenting coaching and to abstain from alcohol or drug use 12 hours before any visits with the children. As if that didn't cause its own ripple of "daaaaayuuummms" around the interwebs, the Superior Court judge underlined his disdain for Brit's behavior by striking down her request for a 50-50 custody agreement and one-upping K-Fed's counter request for a 70-30 arrangement. Too bad the court transcripts are closed, because I bet they are full of all kinds of juicy goodness, y'all.

As we consider all this Access Hollywood wonderment, perhaps the bigger question is this:

Do we feel sorry for Britney? Clearly, losing custody of your children is tough. I cannot imagine the pain that must cause (that is, if you are de-tequilaed or un-little yellow pilled enough to feel pain, but anyway...) both mama and babes. But just as clear is the need for those poor toted around, secondhand smoke exposed, Quarter Pounder and Kool-Aid eating kids to have a safe, loving, happy and stable environment to grow up in to make scale wages as stars of some VH1 show about effed up celebrity children (or as veterinarians or piano teachers or bloggers or whatever). The thing that kills me is that the safe, loving, happy and stable environment is with a dude who wears fedoras and leaves pregnant women to "go on tour" with a new hottie (nope, still not over that).

Ohhhh, to be able to hand out orders for parenting coaching at the playground. Until we can, tell us how much sympathy you've mustered up for lonely old Britney as she packs up the kids stuff to ship to Kev's crib.