Strollerderby : cheating spouses

Husband's Genitals Lit on Fire For Cheating

JeanneSager — Tue, 09 Dec 2008 13:34:00 GMT

Think the headline says it all? Wait, there's more. The couple's three kids were in the house when their mom allegedly sprayed down her sleeping husband's package with "methylated spirits" - highly flammable denatured alcohol - then lit them with a candle.

New Zealand news reports say the guy suffered burns on more than 85 percent of his body; although his kids were rescued from the burning house unscathed.

OK, so the guy was obviously a tool to be stepping out on his wife and three kids. But let's get some perspective here. Want to really castrate this guy? Take his million dollar house in a divorce; don't burn the thing to the ground. And note to Mom: your husband might be a bad spouse, but lighting your house on fire with the kids in side makes you a bad mother . . . and a bit of a psychopath.

Thankfully, pyromania has been limited thus far in its use to cure straying spouses. So let this be a reminder to wronged moms everywhere: you lose your "I bore his children and this is how he repaid me" defense when you put the spawn of his seed at risk too.

Image/Source: 3 News

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Eliot Spitzer Cleared of Prostitution Charges

Brett Singer — Fri, 07 Nov 2008 18:00:00 GMT

It has been decided that former governor of New York Eliot Spitzer – aka the Tainted Gov – will not face criminal charges for repeatedly visiting a prostitute.

The New York Times reports that the reason is because, well, the Johns usually don't get charged. "It’s not surprising,” said Andrew B. Lachow, who once ran the public corruption unit in the United States attorney’s office in Manhattan that has for months been investigating Mr. Spitzer. "There just wasn’t much there that would have called for prosecution."

Now wait a minute.

What happened to if you do the crime, you do the time? Isn't this an open and shut case? I realize that everyone is entitled to a defense, and that trials cost money. But when you get caught red-handed, and when everybody else involved is facing criminal charges, isn't this just a tad unfair?

In other words – if it's hard out here for a pimp, shouldn't it be hard for their customers as well?

The Times article continues: "From the outset, the story of Mr. Spitzer and his patronage of the now-defunct Emperor’s Club V.I.P. read more like a moral tale than a legal one." OK. But he broke the law. Right? "In laying out his decision not to prosecute Mr. Spitzer, Michael J. Garcia, the United States attorney in Manhattan, said he had three main rationales: Mr. Spitzer had apparently not used any public money or campaign funds for his trysts; there was insufficient evidence that he had broken the law in how he had structured payments to the call-girl ring; and, finally, it was not the policy of his or other federal prosecutors’ offices to charge the customers in matters of prostitution."

The real kicker is the last one. Basically, visiting a prostitute is illegal, but if you get caught, you probably won't face any punishment.

The good thing – sort of – is that this doesn't appear to be special treatment for Spitzy, according to attorney Patricia A. Pileggi, a former prosecutor. The financial reasoning behind not charging him is vaguely complicated; to me it sounds like he did what they would accuse him of, but perhaps it would be too difficult to prove in court.

I'm not anti-prostitution. I think it might – MIGHT – even be a good idea to legalize it. (That's a much bigger issue, obviously.) But right now it's against the law. Shouldn't the guys who do it be charged?

Source: NY Times
Image: also NY Times

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They Say: Married Mothers are Floozies

Rachael Brownell (Redsy) — Fri, 02 May 2008 15:26:00 GMT

A recent Cookie Magazine/AOL survey found that over 30% of moms have had an affair since having children and over 50% have seriously considered extra-marital activities.

The three men women are most likely to fantasize about include...

George Clooney, Barack Obama, and Tom Brady (the latter indicates there's no accounting for taste).

Also interesting: while some moms would rather have sex than lose 10 pounds (29%), many women practice pity sex (69%), and over 60% say sex ranks at the bottom of their priority list.

Nearly 50% of the 30,000 women polled indicated that they suspected their husbands of either cheating currently or in the past.

Whatever happens to married couples after they have children, it's clear that some people turn to "outside help" when the going gets too tough.

Hasselbeck says wives need to bring sexy back

Brett Singer — Fri, 14 Mar 2008 17:15:00 GMT

I take it all back. Everything I said. Elisabeth Hasselbeck is the most amazingly wonderful woman in the history of the world. She is a true intellectual, a raconteur of the highest order, and above all: she knows that men need sex.

Of course, Elisabeth doesn't think this applies to "Tainted Guv" Eliot Spitzer and his wife. Of course not. That's why she mentioned the fact that wives need to keep their hubbies happy in the sack while she and her "View" pals were discussing that particular topic. But in general, her attitude is:

"If your guy needs sex, OK, I may not be in the mood, but we're gonna have sex?"

I mean, that's how it is in my house. Isn't it that way in yours?

'Opt-Out' Enemy to Spitzer's Wife: Told You So!

Madeline Holler — Wed, 12 Mar 2008 19:02:00 GMT

Linda Hirshman, enemy of the "opt-out revolution" and smart feminist who's got that special way of making lots of women (especially mothers) feel like total shit about themselves, has reached out to shamed (and now former) N.Y. Governor Eliot Spitzer's wife with this sentiment: too bad, told you so, would have happened sooner or later.

She writes in a short piece on Slate that Silda Wall Spitzer should not have, lo those many years ago, quit her job in mergers and acquisitions to raise her daughters and support her husband's budding career in politics. Silda Spitzer rode her husband's powerful coattails, Hirshman says, and now that he's powerless, she is too. Silly Silda should have seen this coming!

How? Well, because sooooo many powerful men face their downfall with prostitutes, Hirshman argues, getting the full mile out of her thesis with vague evidence, all of it anecdotal (Clinton! Gary Hart! See, Silda, see!).

And now Silda has nothing. No social cache. No trust in her man. No power by proxy. And, especially, no power of her own. Nothing.

Silda, honey, it's gone.

Hirshman often argues that her criticisms center mainly on the elite -- from birth, from education, from levels of power. But she has said before that women should only have one child and never leave their jobs, and elite or not, we all hear it. She's talking about us. Like most critics of stay-at-home parents or those who "opt-out," she ignores the complications of family life between equal partners with unequal take-home-pay who have kids. There's never talk of institutional change -- part-time work, longer vacations, longer maternity, affordable and/or on-site childcare!, good schools, 40-hour work week, etc. Only personal change will do for Hirshman.

What's most damaging is that she puts a tremendous amount of importance in time -- time away from a career. She assumes that something real is lost when women or men make the difficult choice to "opt-out" for a bit when the kids are young. Because even a short break means all is lost.
Anyone who has ever "opted out" knows nothing is lost. The real problem is that even a short break means it's hard to get anyone to take you seriously. Including Linda Hirshman. She reinforces it for those who don't know any better (for example, uh, American corporations and Hirshman's professional area, academia.)

I have little sympathy for Silda Spitzer, because she doesn't need my sympathy, or anything else from me. Our worlds are quite different. But this week and certainly for the next few, the details of her life and the actions of her husband will be overlayed onto my life. This will be used to teach women lessons and issue warnings. The Spitzer crisis will illicit a stern talking-to from every expert out there about all aspects of my little family (and yours).

Today's nagging comes is brought to us by Linda Hirshman. As I did with yesterday's warning from Dr. Laura Schlessinger, I'll be ignoring Hirshman's too.

Photo: Good Morning America

New York Governor Spitzer Resigns

Brett Singer — Wed, 12 Mar 2008 17:23:00 GMT

That's it--he's over. Done. Kaput. Gone-a-rooney.

Governor Spitzer, formerly known as a crusader against, among other things, prostitution rings, announced his resignation today after he was caught on tape arranging to visit a prostitute.

Considering where he was just a few days ago, this has to be one of the biggest falls in political history. Yes, Bill Clinton was President. But that situation was not only very different for several reasons, not the least of which is that Clinton wasn't a pol who was known primarily as a "law and order" guy who made his name going after corruption, promising to "clean up" the office he was elected to. What a mess.

Regardless of what some pundits say, the wife is not to blame at all here. Even if she were having an affair herself, he still has to make the decision to go to a prostitute. Also, with allegations that he spent $80,000 on, ahem, services, that probably means he spent a whole lot more.

What a fool. What a dummy. What a... feh.

On his Sirius Satellite radio show Tuesday, Howard Stern pointed out that Spitzer's father wanted him to be "the first Jewish President," and maybe, deep down, Eliot didn't really want to do it. So it's self-destructive behavior. That's as good an explanation as any, frankly. What makes someone in his position do this? "Sex addiction" sounds like a load of baloney, to put it mildly. Howard also wished he could be a fly on the wall at the Spitzer household, which I have to agree with. I mean, what do you say to your wife, your three daughters? Oops? Be like Shaggy and say, "It wasn't me?" Not likely.

New York will make history now with its first African-American governor, who also happens to be blind. Lt. Gov. David Paterson will now take over.

Man. March Madness, indeed.