Strollerderby : diapers

Who knows how mothers managed before the days of the iPhone.

If the Baby Brain iPhone app is any indication, we left them sitting in poopy diapers all day and neglected to nurse!

Designed to help new parents break through the fog of the newborn phase, the app lets you track track feedings, diapers, and sleep. Sent to us by a reader who I'm sure has the best intentions, I'm just not sure how many parents will find this useful.

Maybe I'm the only parent out there who didn't log everything my daughter did as a baby? I had one sitter who gave me a list of every time my daughter had a bowel movement (which she sweetly marked "BM" with a smiley face) and a full description of each. My reaction? Er, OK. Just telling me she had some poopy diapers would have been enough for me.

Nor did I ever find myself writing down how much she ate per feeding or how long she ate for (which, by the way, they say is counterproductive for breastfeeders). And my pediatrician never asked for specifics unless there was something wrong.

I can relate to swimming along in a sleepless fog after my daughter was born, but if multi-tasking diapers and feedings is too much for you, I have a piece of advice: put down the iPhone and give your texting thumbs a rest.

What do you think, parents, will you be downloading this one to get you through the day? It's about to be available on iTunes, so if it's for you, have at!

Image: Baby Brain

Dad Steals for Diaper Money

Hannah Tennant-Moore — Thu, 09 Apr 2009 15:00:00 GMT

An Illinois father has apparently seen the movie Raising Arizona one too many times. After robbing a couple at gunpoint in their home, 21-year-old Jeffrey Humphrey made off with $108, but never had a chance to use it.

Three hours after the burglary, police found Humphrey at his home, less than half a mile from the scene of the crime, with a $100 bill in his pocket. On second thought, maybe he needs to bone up on his heist movies….

Humphrey admitted to the robbery and told detectives that he needed the money to pay for diapers for his infant. According to the Southtown Star, “The $108 stolen would pay for about 350 diapers, enough to last about five weeks for the average newborn.” That’s assuming, of course, that he wasn’t planning to buy cloth, which would have given him much more bang for his embezzled buck.

For five weeks of diapers that he never even bought, Humphrey could be locked up for as long as 30 years.

Photo: ugo.com

Let's Do the Twist, Baby

JeanneSager — Thu, 22 Jan 2009 21:21:00 GMT

Someone once told me that babies have natural rhythm.

If they do, some of us must lose it along the way - because this white girl can't dance. At all. Not even in the shuffling around the room with arms around your prom date's shoulder's kind of sense. It didn't help that my prom date was six-foot-five, and I was five-foot-three-and-three-quarters, but I digress.

Someone sent me the following video of a baby doing the Twist to make me laugh (they succeeded), but I was just in awe. Obviously the music was added later, but you have to watch this baby go.

Lying on his little changing pad (no worries, Dad's hand is evident nearby at all times during filming), he wiggles and jiggles and does a pretty convincing Twist.

Funny Videos

Now: to every parent who has had the diaper tussle, bookmark this. Next time your elbow lands in poop because they won't just lay still and you need a laugh, you can pull it up.

Via Funny Junk

Video Baby Poop Advice

Brett Singer — Mon, 19 Jan 2009 23:00:00 GMT

Jennifer Trachtenberg, author of "Good Kids, Bad Habits: The RealAge Guide to Raising Healthy Children" is going to "ease parents fears about baby poop."

Well I feel better now. Don't you?

It's not a bad video, actually. I think I got most of this information from our pediatrician, and also from my wife, who actually read the various parenting books that we had when the kids were born.

A couple of the comments are worth quoting:

"So what is it you do for work: I talk about baby poop!" (JEH78)

"I'm never having children...." (cascadeice20)

And of course:

"Everybody poops." (wesw818)

Dr. Trachtenberg's video also reminded me about the various types of baby crap, which is a bit freaky the first few times you see it. The general conception that I had is, "Oh, it'll smell. Whatever." But there are a lot of different varieties that turn up in a diaper, and that "mustardy" stuff the doctor describes is one of the weirdest. So thanks for the trip down Poopy Memory Lane.

image: wackypackages.org

Source: YouTube

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Who Buys The Baby Products In Your House?

Brett Singer — Thu, 01 Jan 2009 16:15:00 GMT

We now present: The Diaper Follies.

Scene: An apartment in Manhattan. There is a stench. It is coming from the baby. The baby's father, a stay at home dad, puts the baby on the changing table and removes his diaper. It is indeed filled with a noxious substance not unlike nuclear waste. After cleaning the baby's tushy, Father notices that there are no clean diapers. He picks up a telephone and calls Mother, who is at work.

Father (very cheerful, abnormally so): Hi Honey.

Mother (working, wary of Father's cheerful mood): Hello dear. What's up?

Father (still cheery but as transparent as a brand-new window): We're out of diapers.

(Pause.)

Mother (calm): You should go buy some.

(Pause.)

Father (still cheerful, hiding his nervousness): Great idea! Thanks hon! See you later!

And… scene.

*-*-*

Obviously that's not exactly what happened. I would never leave a baby on the changing table while I made a phone call, for example. But I did email my wife (I didn't call, that would be weird) and inform her that we were out of diapers. We just, I don't know. We didn't have any. And I didn't know where she got them from.

Does that make me a dummy? I was probably tired and it was my first time. The point is, despite the fact that my wife is the primary wage earner and I am the primary childcare person, she's still in charge of stuff like diaper purchases.

While I never called my wife at work to tell her we were out of diapers or other baby products, that still isn't really my department. Another example: I am at the drugstore to buy diapers. Upon arriving, I realize that I have no idea what size diaper my children wear. Rather than buy the wrong size (which has happened before and may happen again – would those kids just start using the freakin' bathroom? Sheesh) I call home and say, "Honey? What size diapers should I buy?" I am mocked for not knowing, but that's better than the beating I receive for buying the wrong size. (Note: my wife has never actually beaten me for buying the wrong diapers. Mocked me, yes. Forced me to wear the diaper on my head…OK, that's not true either. But mocking. Oh, the mocking.)

Anyway, I was wondering – who's in charge of baby product buying at your house?

Image: Amazon

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Parenting 101: Changing a Baby's Diaper On an Airplane

Kate Tuttle — Mon, 22 Dec 2008 19:29:00 GMT

Traveling this holiday season? Worried you'll get one of those planes with no changing table in the lavatory? Just in time for your diapering-while-flying conundrum, here are some sites with useful tips for dealing with junior's dirty dipe while crusing at 30,000 feet.

From MSNBC's travel writer comes an assortment of ideas from parents who, it turns out, were writing to complain about an earlier column in which she declared all in-air diapering verboten. She graciously issued a mea culpa and shared her column with the experts: parents who have actually flown with little ones. Best information: which planes have changing tables (nearly all widebodied planes, like the Boeing 767 and 777 and Airbus 300). Most pointless factoid: changing a table in an airplane lavatory without a changing table is damn hard work. Most disgusting etiquette "don't": Gary, an airline employee, says he's seen parents change their baby on the tray tables, using all three in the row to stretch out the baby's body. As he points out, these trays are not typically cleaned between flights so, um, that's a good reason right there to bring your wipes even if you don't plan to change the baby.

Another site offers some handy tips, including the a-ha idea of timing any seat- or floor-based diaper change to the bathroom visits your seatmates make. If you finish up quickly, they won't even know you changed your baby within inches of where they're sitting. Another tip? Waving around a diaper wipe to use as an on-the-fly air freshener.

Mostly, the expert advice is the same as what any parent could come up with: try for the biggest plane you can possibly book (any semi-nervous flyer already does this), slap on a fresh diaper at the airport, just before boarding, and hope for the best. Of the 40+ separate flights I've taken so far with my two-year old, he's only had a poo blowout once, and that was on a plane that featured a changing table (yay!) but on a day I had neglected to pack extra pants (boo!). It's all, if you'll pardon the expression, a crapshoot. Got any tips of your own for dealing with diapers while flying? Share them in the comments section!

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Elimination Communication: Trend Not Dying After All?

editors — Mon, 08 Dec 2008 18:52:00 GMT

Earlier this year on Babble, Madeline Holler listed Elimination Communication as one of the fading trends of '08, and Babble contributor Gina Zucker wrote about how her friend's use of EC almost ended their friendship. But not everyone has gotten the memo that EC is out.

For those not in the know, in Elimination Communication, the elimination aspect is two-fold. First, you eliminate using diapers. Then you watch your baby for cues that he or she is ready to eliminate, just as you would watch for cues that your baby is hungry or sleepy. When you get the cue, you take the baby to the bathroom and hold him over the toilet until the deed is done.

This post on CafeMom features a woman two months into the experience. Here's an excerpt:

Baby Buzz: How has Domino adjusted to going diaperless?

BabyDio: She likes it. Some days are easier than others of course, but she really enjoys going to the potty. I bet her favorite part is the "pssss" sound—it always make her laugh. It's also really good "mommy baby time," as silly as that sounds. It forces me to stop what I'm doing to take her to the potty, and she likes the extra attention.

What's your take on EC? And shouldn't it really be a hardcore band's name by now?

Continue reading about Domino here at Baby Buzz on CafeMom or check out Diaper Free Baby for more on EC.

( Image from www.bookdepository.co.uk )

10 WORST. BABY. PRODUCTS. EVER! (Part 2)

Cole Gamble — Mon, 01 Dec 2008 16:00:00 GMT

Baby Tattoos

At some point you might think I’m just being a crank, grousing about stuff that’s purely for novelty, a joke. But I argue that the jokes are dumb. Case in point, baby tattoos. However, if the idea behind the joke is to get your kid shanked in the prison yard, than it’s hilarious.

Man Boobs

Please lord save us from this product. That goes double for the men who feel they need them.

The Daddle

Well we just got done turn your kids into animals, now it’s dad’s turn. What dad hasn’t played horsey with his kids? Thanks to the Daddle, you can take an innocent game and turn it into the degrading exercise it was always meant to be. Once that kid gets the Daddle strapped to ya, you’ll never be anything more than a pack mule to her. And hey, what about the Maddle? Can’t mommy give dad a break?

Fortunately, the Daddle comes with a three-month supply of Vicodin for all your impending back pain.

Baby Perfume by Hello Kitty

The perfect way to say to your child, “You stink.” What exactly does Hello Kitty smell like, anyhow? I’m thinking it smells like unicorn barf.

Super Creepy My Little Pony

Ever since my daughter got one of these I haven’t had a night’s rest. I stay up all night staring at the ceiling and say to myself over and over, “Can’t sleep, baby pony will eat me. Can’t sleep, baby pony will eat me.”

Go to Worst Baby Products Part I

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The iPhone: Making Parenting Easier (and Techier)

Jen Chaney — Sun, 16 Nov 2008 19:28:00 GMT

There are plenty of iPhone applications to occupy our kids' time and attention. But what about the apps that make parenting easier?

Brett mentioned three not too long ago, but a recent post on ParentDish -- which I discovered via Wired's Geekdad blog -- provides an extensive overview of iPhone applications that are particularly helpful to parents. So far, no one has figured out a way to make the iPhone raise our children for us. But many of these make our parenting responsibilities easier. You should definitely check out the full post, but these are the four I think new moms and dads may find most useful:

Baby Monitor: This one turns your iPhone into a baby monitor, which is such a great idea, especially for parents who frequently travel or don't want to spend extra money on another device. Word of caution: Yes, the phone will call you when the infant stirs, but that doesn't mean it's safe to leave the kid in his crib while you hit a "Quantum of Solace" matinee.

Nursing Tracker: Most moms find it challenging to keep track of how long they last nursed, which side the child fed on, etc., especially when they're operating on very little sleep. This app helps make that process easier. Sure, you could just write down the information. But this way, that feeding log can't get lost or inadvertently thrown away by a spouse who think he's being helpful by cleaning up in the nursery. Not that, like, I am speaking from experience.

Food Additives: This application is perfect for parents of children with food sensitivities and allergies. It allows you to look up information about 450-plus additives, ideal for those times in the grocery store when you're trying to make a quick decision about whether to buy or not to buy. Pretty useful for grown-ups with allergies, too.

Diaper Tracker: This is one that Brett mentioned and is perhaps the most useful of them all. My husband and I spent a ludicrous amount of time tracking our son's, um, defecation progress in those early days because he wasn't gaining enough weight. This app allows you to record all of the relevant information, right down to the description of the b.m. (Appetizing, I know.) Now, will you look like kind of an a-hole when the pediatrician asks for details about your child's bowel movements and you whip out your iPhone? Kinda. But you'll also have the most precise poop information of any parent around.

Image: codegoo.com via ParentDish.

10 WORST. BABY. PRODUCTS. EVER! (Part 1)

Cole Gamble — Thu, 13 Nov 2008 16:00:00 GMT

Baby Wipe Warmer

Okay, I love my kid, but making sure he has hot towels for his little ass seems overkill for me. Not only is the baby wipe warmer useless, it’s dangerous too. Wipe warmers carry the risk of causing a fire electric shock. Umm, my kids butt will just have to deal with the cold.

The Child Leash

Many boyfriends, husbands and would-be fathers have had the moment: you hear an alarm go off in your girlfriend’s/wife’s uterus. You can hear the words almost before she says them, “I want a baby.” As a time honored tradition, many spooked men have tried to redirect this mothering instinct by saying, “hey, why don’t we get a dog instead.” I do not believe this strategy has worked in the entire history of mankind. There are cave paintings of Neanderthal dudes getting their offer of adopting a wooly mammoth rejected by their women decorating a corner of the cave in pink.

That doesn’t mean you can’t treat your kid like dog. The Parent Leash takes all the fun of dominating a lesser species and applies to your spawn. Imagine the joy of your kid away when he gets too enamored with sniffing other kids’ butts.

Baby Keeper

What insane super billionaire is turning live infants into wall art? Oprah, I’m looking in your direction.

Baby High Heels

Might as well book your daughter on Jerry Springer now, ‘cause that’s where she’ll go when you get these tacky shoes for her.

Diaper Genie

Genie, eh? And what is so magical about the Diaper Genie? The people at Playtex purport that the Diaper Genie is an odor free diaper disposal system. You know what else works well for diaper disposal? The trashcan outside. My wife and I owned one of these and I can tell you there is no magic here. One problem, the liner refills are crazy hard to install and if you do it wrong, poop everywhere. Also the actual disposal of the diaper requires an inordinate amount of pressure, and pressure is not something a poop laden diaper like. As the poop oozes around your fist, you’ll wonder how you’ll ever get your hand “odor-free” again. Finally, the Diaper Genie seals away each individual diaper so there will be zero chance the thing will ever break down in the landfill. When you’re a grandparent you can take your grandkids to visit the magical poop snake your diaper genie created decades ago.

Go to Worst Baby Products Part II

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How To Fake Being the Crafty Mom This Halloween

JeanneSager — Mon, 20 Oct 2008 15:57:00 GMT

What's better than being the creative mom who makes her kids' Halloween costumes? Faking it.

YouCanMakeThis is a whole Website devoted to pretending you came up with crafty ideas for your kids, including crochet patterns for pirate hats and make-your-own tutus. Some of this stuff looks too hard to fake. They promise that the buccaneer hat is perfect for a "beginning crocheter," but they had me at crocheter. And even I can admit it's a little disingenuous.

But it's cheaper than buying a whole book full of costume plans you'll never be able to tackle, and you'll earn a little street cred with the "we make our own baby food/sew our own cloth diapers/make elaborate princess castles out of a single cardboard box" mom set.

I have come to terms with the fact that I will never be Martha. Despite the packrat in me that's stored up bits of ribbon and decoupage-able cardboard boxes, all I've got is a closet of crap. But facing a future when the free Halloween costume run we've enjoyed will come to an abrupt (and expensive) end, I'm getting myself ready.

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The Sh*t List: 10 Bizarre (or Terrific?) Potty Gadgets

Cole Gamble — Thu, 25 Sep 2008 16:00:00 GMT

When a child learns to poop or pee in a toilet on their own, it’s an event worthy of a tickertape parade. Or at least you’d think so based on how parents react to this milestone. Who can blame them? One family’s diaper budget can equal the gross domestic product of a small Pacific Rim nation. But sometimes maybe parents want too desperately for the independent potty to come. So they turn to science, or more to the point, weird-ass inventions.

The Potty Pony

For the tyke who needs to defecate on the go, this horse shaped toilet teaches your kid to poop and also a healthy disdain for nature’s creatures. If this one works out for you, I just wouldn’t take junior to a petting zoo thereafter.

Potty Monkey

Who knows more about poop than monkeys? Oddly enough, this do-gooding monkey doesn’t want to teach your child to fling her feces, but rather deposit it in the bowl. Potty monkey insists your kid take him potty, and if they resist, monkey gets agitated. And that when the feces flinging begins.

Potty Mate

You know what will get your kids over their toilet fear? Talking toilet paper. The Potty Mate seeks to give your child encouragement when he reaches for the roll. I could use one of these. Instead of potty time encouragement (I am pretty good at that now, thank you) it could give me more specified approbation. “Hey, it looks like your hair isn’t thinning as rapidly before. Way to go!” OR “Don’t listen to them, 31 isn’t too old to start a hard-core thrash metal band.”

Potty Targets

These must be the most sensible gadget on the list. Put ‘em in the toilet and your boy plays William Tell with a quiver full of urine. Just make sure you don’t leave the extra targets just lying around.

Want More? Check it out.

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iPhone app for nursing, diapers, wedding day

Brett Singer — Fri, 19 Sep 2008 16:00:00 GMT

Actually, these are all separate apps, and are not necessarily to be used in that order. (Not that there's anything wrong with doing things in that order, of course.)

Proving that the iPhone is good for more than just viewing dopey YouTube videos, ANDESigned has released iPhone apps to help busy parents remember that the kid is hungry, smelly, and oh yeah, shouldn't you be married?

Here are the apps:

- Baby Tracker: Diapers
"With the tap of a button, Baby Tracker: Diapers records everything you need to keep track of concerning this “stinky” part of child rearing! Forget about journaling, lists and charts...Baby Tracker: Diapers does the remembering for you!"

Me, I didn't keep track of any of this stuff, but if I did, this seems like it would be an easy way to do it. At 99 cents, it's actually cheaper than some notebooks.

- Baby Tracker: Nursing
This more expensive ($7.99) app "keeps track of your nursing sessions with just a few clicks, allowing you to relax and focus on feeding your baby without worrying about lists and sheets of paper, stop-watches and safety pins in your bra, or extraneous ribbons and bracelets!" This one I admit to being totally ignorant about, so I ask the readers: is this something nursing mothers keep track of, which breast, etc.? To my completely untrained eye, it always looked like the schedule was partly dictated by baby hunger, and partly by reality (must… get… milk… out… NOW…).

This feature is interesting: "Multiple baby support (up to 6), with names and easy switching (slide your finger left or right)." Is it possible to nurse that many babies? That's a LOT of milk.

- Wedding Day
Again, the order these are listed in is probably accidental, but with teen pregnancy being much in the news of late, it's sort of funny that Wedding Day comes after diapers and nursing.

This app (not yet available) will cost 99 cents, and seems to be arguably the most useful in terms of helping someone to organize things. I found my wedding plans to be incredibly complicated, and most of my involvement was limited to, "If we use that band, I’m not coming."

Any iPhone users out there planning on trying these apps?

See also: techmamas, Gizmodo, daddytypes

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5 Ways to Not Go Broke (with Kids)

Cole Gamble — Mon, 18 Aug 2008 17:00:00 GMT

Having a family is a pricy pastime, like eating Faberge eggs or using antique bone china for skeet shooting. Instead of fantasizing about the kind of European sport car you could buy for the amount of money you spend on your kids, consider ways to cut those costs. Here are some budget trimmers:

1 Christmas in January

When is the best time to buy Christmas presents? Why after Christmas, of course. Stock up for next year. Just make sure you don’t buy this year’s fad. By next year that toy will be as cool as a Beanie Baby.

2 Pack up to Travel

Whether on a plane or in the car, buying food while on route to your destination is going to be expensive. Pack up snacks and lunches for the kids. Yes, airlines do allow you to bring food aboard.

3 Know When to Clothe ‘Em

The best time to buy kid clothes are February and August. That’s when most stores put their stuff on sale. The key here is to think ahead to the season you are buying for. Buying a coat will be cheap in the summer, but you’re kid will be bigger by the time they need it. Think about buying a size larger.

4 Don’t Wait in Line, Buy Diapers and Formula Online

Skip the store for baby needs and buy online. If you hunt around you’re guaranteed to get a better price.

5 A Home Cooked Meal

Dining out costs 6 to 10 times more than eating at home. Start treating a dinner out as a treat. Also try more ethnic food. It’s generally cheaper than, say, steakhouses, and it will teach your kids an appreciation for a broad range of foods.

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10 Mysteries of Modern Parenthood (and some possible solutions)

Rachael Brownell (Redsy) — Fri, 25 Jul 2008 12:01:00 GMT

Facing the awesome responsibility of parenthood is easier if leavened with humor, enlightenment, and many vacations.

Here are 10 mysteries of modern parenthood and some possible solutions:

1. Paying for childbirth - Assuming you have insurance, when the bills start pouring once you have the baby, unraveling the payment puzzle requires patience and persistence and possibly an economics degree.

Possible Solution: Don't be shy about availing yourself of the insurance company's appeal process and making many calls to resolve outstanding bills. Each state has some version of a health insurance commissioner, who can be a very helpful advocate. Many children are also eligible for free or low-cost insurance.

2. Baby sign language - Is this is the biggest con sold to modern parents of all time or does it really help parents communicate with their kids?

Possible Solution: Babble polled several experts on this topic and did your research for you. Or just submit to your cynicism and read this.

3. FMLA - Family Medical Leave Act. Mystery: Are we eligible? Are we not? Should I be grateful for 12 weeks of unpaid leave?

Possible Solution: Save up your sick and vacation time, ask your company to consider offering paid maternity leave, move to Canada, Support Momsrising.org.

4. Toy/Carseat/Baby Product Safety - Are we poisoning our children if we buy Dora or Diego toys, feed them formula in BPA laced bottles, or cover them in sunscreen?

Possible Solution: Z Recommends blog offers many extremely informative product safety guides addressing everything from sunscreens to bathtoys.

5. Breast vs. Formula - Most of us agree that breast is best, but how much better than formula is it really? And what if you are unable to breastfeed or choose not to?

Possible Solution: Do the best you can and stand behind it. Stay away from La Leche League if you choose to formula feed. Read: Formula Fed and Flexible Parenting and Madeline Holler's Babble feature about extended breastfeeding to appreciate different approaches.

6. Childcare - How to afford it. How to find high quality options. Nanny or center? Work or stay home?

Possible Solution: Most studies are concluding that some combination of work and family time makes most parents feel happiest. If your work lets you cut back your hours and you can afford it (without being Mommy or Daddy Tracked) this has been the best solution for my family.

7. Education - Single sex education? Homeschool? Public or private? Waldorf? Montessori?

Possible Solution: Doing what works is obviously best. There is no question that public school is cheapest, but has No child Left Behind Ruined it?

8. Coparenting - Myth or reality?

Possible Solution: This assumes there are (at least) two parents available and willing to raise the kids. While there are plenty of signs that parenting is more equal than it used to be, many still think there is much room for improvement.

9. Potty training - Is it necessary?

Possible Solution: Parents these days are much less stressed about getting their kids potty-trained by 6 months of age. For a great round-up of blogs discussing potty-training, go here.

10. When is it the right time to have a child? - Even though we're cynical narcissists who complain a lot, most of us would agree that "yes" nearly anytime is a great time to have a child.

Making Water Everywhere: The Truth about Bed-Wetting.

Rachael Brownell (Redsy) — Sat, 28 Jun 2008 14:30:00 GMT

There are two distinct phases of potty-training. The first, that many parents talk about, getting the kid to use the potty during the day and the second, getting the kid potty-trained at night, which many parents don't talk about.

Why is that?

Obviously, many of us are embarrassed that our 6, 7, 8 year olds aren't potty-trained yet at night. But perhaps we wouldn't be so ashamed if we knew how common this situation actually is? According to the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, over 15% of kids still wet the bed after age three.

If you're discouraged by your child's inability to stay dry at night you're in good company. By limiting liquids, avoiding shaming your child, and encouraging potty before bed, the situation will likely improve. And the good news is most kids cure themselves of bedwetting by age 7 anyway.

Budget Baby: Cutting Corners on Baby Stuff

Amy Kuras — Wed, 18 Jun 2008 01:52:00 GMT

There's some ridiculous figure out there about how much it costs to raise a baby to adulthood. Of course, that seems to assume that you buy everything new, for yourself (no showers or hand me downs or whatever), disposable diaper and bottle feed, have your little darlings in every activity known to humanity and so forth.

Still, even with generous friends and families and an eye for resale, it can be breathtaking how much it actually costs to have a little baby around. We've been out of babyland for a couple years and now are horrified at how much money goes out of this house on a weekly basis, and we mostly cloth diaper and only supplement with formula here and there (he's four months old and we're still on the free cans from the hospital). And he's not even eating solids yet.

Consumer Reports, a.k.a bible of the thrifty dork, is on the case.There's some ridiculous figure out there about how much it costs to raise a baby to adulthood. Of course, that seems to assume that you buy everything new, for yourself (no showers or hand me downs or whatever), disposable diaper and bottle feed, have your little darlings in every activity known to humanity and so forth.

Still, even with generous friends and families and an eye for resale, it can be breathtaking how much it actually costs to have a little baby around. We've been out of babyland for a couple years and now are horrified at how much money goes out of this house on a weekly basis, and we mostly cloth diaper and only supplement with formula here and there (he's four months old and we're still on the free cans from the hospital). And he's not even eating solids yet.

Consumer Reports, a.k.a bible of the thrifty dork, is on the case. They actually have a baby and kids blog, and this post talks about tips on saving on baby stuff. For example, sign up for every "new parent club" out there. They'll send you good coupons ($2 off diapers is par for the course) and formula "checks" (which has baffled every cashier at every store I ever used them at, but whatever).

They also suggest buying a warehouse club membership, which I can also vouch for – I've even given Costco memberships as baby gifts. They not only have good prices on whopping packs of diapers and wipes, but I've even seen fancy jogging strollers and bike trailers there, and really good deals on Carter's pajamas and cute dresses.

What are your tips to save on baby shopping? Any hidden coupon deals out there or good places to pick up bargains?

Other uses for diapers: Heroin Hiding!

Brett Singer — Sat, 14 Jun 2008 20:50:00 GMT

Ah, diapers. So useful for so many things. You know, like... well, okay, diapers are really just for keeping the stuff that bounces out of your babies' bodies away from their clothes.

But Frank Keys Jr. is not bound by convention! According to this Associated Press story, Frank was pulled over by state police in New Orleans. After searching the car, drug sniffing dogs discovered something was going on in his pants.

Here's a couple of quotes:

During the pat-down, "officers felt a large hard object in the pants area on Keys," according to a news release from the U.S. Attorney's office.

Out of context, that could be taken the wrong way. Methinks somebody was chuckling when they wrote that press release.

Then there's this:

Keys told officers he was wearing a diaper and when they asked if there was anything in the diaper, he "shook his head affirmatively."

Tell me you haven't had that exact conversation with your toddler.

Of course, there's a key (no pun intended) difference between what's in your kids' diaper and what was in Frank's. The man had "257 grams of heroin" hidden in there. According to this site, one gram goes for approximately $300, or more if it is broken up into milligrams. That means there was at least $80,000 worth of dope in this dope's diaper. Good thing he wasn't wearing one of these.

image: ebaumsworld (note: this image is not a picture of the man with heroin in his diaper)

Pregcellent: Babies Do Come With (Hilarious) Instructions!

Kelly Mills — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 13:31:00 GMT

As a new parent, the whole baby thing can be overwhelming, to say the least. There's this idea we should just know how to do stuff naturally, like breastfeeding or interpreting the baby's cries correctly with little or no instruction. But of course, it isn't that instinctive. The lucky moms and dads have good relatives and friends to share parenting pearls with, and of course there's tons of books on the subject as well. But other people can get annoying with the constant advice, and the books are by and large dull as bleaugh.

That's why I think nothing is quite as good at breaking down what to do and what not to do as this site, in simple "yes" and "no" terms. I laughed for a loooong time at this. The helpful photos instantly tell you how to do so many of the essential infant things. My favorite is probably the one on bonding, but they are all pretty damn good. Like the diaper change one...Chortle snicker.

Pregcellent: What Gear Do You Need?

Kelly Mills — Wed, 05 Mar 2008 16:34:00 GMT

There's a post on HuffPo about some fairly ridiculous gadgets for parents. You can get a fancy-pants baby timer for tracking your baby's sleep and nap and diaper schedule, presumably to help avoid the age-old question, "Crap, when did the baby last eat?" Of course, when I had a newborn I could barely dial a phone number, much less program a handheld device with four timers. And there's also the LENA System, which records conversations between you and your baby and analyzes them on a computer. I know I would not want to be caught on tape making annoying babbling sounds, but perhaps this is good practice for the kid should they ever come under government surveillance. But perhaps you own these things, and find them indispensable.

'Course this all raises the question: What exactly do you need? Anywhere from a dresser drawer and a couple diapers, to a pre-warmed sleigh crib and video monitor, depending on who you ask. Part of the problem is that it's hard to know what your baby will even like, and what you'll find easiest to use. My child abhorred the baby swing, and I found the metronome noise it made put me, not my kid, to sleep. However, our vibrating bouncy seat made three months of showering possible. Other could-go-either-way items include the special bed co-sleeping attachment or a crib; a frontpack (versus sling); white noise machines (try the vacuum cleaner in a pinch); diaper wipe warmers; and exersaucers. We got the most life out of our baby bjorn, our cheap-o folding stroller, and the high chair. But if I could have made one slightly more extravagant purchase, what would I have invested in? Screw the LENA System--I would have gotten a night nurse.

To Pee or Not to Pee

Adrienne Martini — Wed, 26 Dec 2007 15:24:00 GMT

If you want to start a fight when you meet a new parent online, the quickest route isn't to bring up breast v. bottle or Waldorf v. Montessori. No, if you really want to descent into screaming fits of madness, whisper the words: elimination communication.

Who knew that the world of diaperless v. diapered infants could be so heated. Heather Caliri, who wrote a feature about her diaperless baby for Brain, Child magazine, has discovered, the mere mention of babies who pee can unleash all sorts of online angst. Among the weighty issues under debate are the merits of peeing in a public sink, the entitlement of parents and the proper use of hand santizer.

Nothing like a little urine to bring out the flamer in everyone.

Don't Fight Over Who Has to Change the Diapers - Try Playing Spin the Baby!

Alisyn — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 15:10:00 GMT

"I did the last one!"

"It's your turn!"

"One, two three... NOT IT!"

These are just some of the things my husband and I say to get out of changing poopy diapers. C'mon... you do it too. So why not turn the diaper changing drudgery into an exciting - if not slightly dangerous - game of chance, like these folks did?

To be fair, not all kids would take to this "game" the way young Gabe seems to have done. That little guy was spinning around so fast, I'm amazed that he was able to up at all, much less get up without blowing chunks everywhere. But hey, it's worth a shot - you have a 50% chance of getting out of diaper duty! I call those some pretty sweet odds. It's the parent's version of Spin the Bottle... except no one gets drunk, and instead of making out with your best friend's boyfriend, you get poop on your hands.

Aaaaaaand that pretty much sums up parenting in general, I think.