Morning News: Hormonal Women the Answer to Economic Recovery

Madeline Holler — Tue, 31 Mar 2009 13:00:00 GMT

Perhaps President Obama and his economic advisors have been thinking about this economic recovery all wrong. Instead of giving money and loans to banks and businesses, they should give it to the people who could really inject some cash into this economy: women. Specifically, hormonal women.

A new British study claims to show that women way overspend when they ovulate and that they do the real damage a week before their periods start. So one minute the gals are cranky and crampy, the next they're all "oh, look at those pretty shoes." We hate studies like this.

This will piss a (very) few premenstrual women off: "Guiding Light" is getting axed. The longest running soap opera (70 years if you count its run on the radio) just isn't attracting viewers like it once did. (Who knew it was even still on the air?)

Know what show isn't getting axed and has far more viewers than we'd even like to imagine? Glenn Beck's on FOX News. This guy is such a screaming, ranting, dangerous racist, it's unbelievable that he gets to have a TV show -- and suddenly, lots and lots of coverage (which, we realize, we're adding to here ...).

He probably even drives a Hummer, the vehicle that represents this most recent economic, carbon and car-size exuberance. The Hummer bubble has burst as well. The GM brand is searching for a buyer. Maybe the auto giant's now former CEO (fired by Obama ... yikes!) would be interested.

Other perks of the well-to-do, but this one isn't going away: buying one's way into college. In fact, it's now easier than ever for the college-bound with parents of means to get into fancy schools, even if they're crappy students, even if there's a waiting list a mile long for better students of lesser means. Ahhhh. Now that's some economic news we can wrap our minds around!

Here's what else money can buy: four-year-old Mercy Grace! She's the Malawian girl Madonna is trying to adopt. Folks in Malawi are being critical of this generous and entitled and well-meaning super star, so it looks like little Mercy will join the family later rather than sooner as a judge has delayed his decision.

Hundreds of school campuses in California are at-risk for outbreaks of childhood illnesses such as measles and mumps, according to the LA Times. Most of these schools are in more affluent areas, so yours truly is enjoying the breeze up here on the moral highground.

We would also like to share the best and worst shampoos, according to NBC's Today Show. Not surprisingly, what appeared to be a bar of soap made the worst list.

Oh, and fat babies are at risk for becoming fat toddlers. So get those chubberkins on a diet!

Photo: sheknows.com

Remember Baby Jessica? An Indian Boy's Struggle Makes a Mom Cry

JeanneSager — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 21:22:00 GMT

I remember my mother holding me tight while workers were down a well in Texas trying to rescue Baby Jessica. It was 1987, and my mother had not just me but my infant brother at home while every mom in the country held her breath for the 18-month-old Jessica McClure. I was a typical kid who wanted to get back to reading my book. I didn't know about a baby in a well, and I didn't care.

Two decades later, this morning I was the mother hugging tight a struggling kid while workers are down a 150-foot borewell in India digging to rescue a 2-year-old. What is it about being a parent that makes us that much more attuned to a family in crisis?

Before getting pregnant, I would never have wished real ill toward a child. But I wouldn't have sat with one tab open on my computer screen, watching for news of a child literally half a world away. I would have read the story, shrugged, moved on. I might have let pass a comment to my husband or coworkers about how sad it was. But that's it. I felt empathy. I am, after all, human. But nothing like this. Last week, writing a story for the local newspaper about a child suffering from neuroblastoma with a complication that has taken away the almost-2-year-old's ability to walk, and the family's struggle to make ends meet, I wept over my keyboard. When I pulled it together, I pulled my daughter onto my lap and stuck my nose in her hair to drink in the baby shampoo, and I nearly lost it again. I'm not pregnant. I'm not hormonal. But I read the story of 2-year-old Sonu, who is still stuck, 60 feet down the bore well near his home in Agra, India, and I clenched my fists to keep from crying.

Is this all part and parcel of being a parent? Do you find yourself clenching your fists until you find out another person's child is going to be OK?

Image: The Times of India

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Strollerderby : hormonal

Morning News: Hormonal Women the Answer to Economic Recovery

Remember Baby Jessica? An Indian Boy's Struggle Makes a Mom Cry